Ok.. I just responded to a topic..
And my answer to the topic got me thinking.... and I'm hoping I'm not the only one that is discovering this.. or has this problem.. well maybe it's not a problem...

Do you find that when you begin to talk to somebody online...
Or even when you go on a meet and greet... that you can spot potential red flags in that person really quickly..

Like scary quick...lol..
I cannot tell you how many women I have met that have so many.. past unresolved relationship issues..
Or psychological issues..
Or self-esteem body issues...
Or they just or looking for instant gratification sexually.. always have Fifty Shades of Grey on their brains..
Or maybe have just one.. flaw to the physical self that I find a bit off-putting..ie). She's a great person very attractive but it looks like she never brushs ..her teeth... or she's just a little too short.. or a little too overweight...
Or they misrepresent themselves in their profile pictures and who they are on their profile... which is totally crazy when you think about it.. because we are going to meet at some point...
As an example.. last night I met somebody online.. good profile good-looking woman.. quite a few body pictures.. and then just one picture of her face but really close up...
And in her body pictures.. she either had sunglasses on or a hat and sunglasses so you could never really see her face.. big red flag...
So during the course of text messaging.. each other and the conversations were going great by the way... I asked her why this was and if I could have a picture of her face where it's not a close up... well she totally.. got weird on me... and instantly ended the conversation...me..wtf.. not a big deal to ask of us face picture...
So obviously there was some type of issues that I was not aware of with her..
Or am I just imagining things...
But this is what I'm talking about issues that come up really quickly

Nobody is perfect. Everyone of us has some issues, flaws, weirdnesses. You should ask yourself which issues you can accept and which ones you can't.

Red flag? - When person is dishonest about himself. I would rather accept him with other flaws, but not with dishonesty.

I agree with sipsik about having to decide which issues you can accept or which you cannot.

Red flags for me , are :

narcissism, negativity, helplessness, clinginess, perfectionism, defensiveness, inconsiderateness, excessive cynicism, or emotional emptiness,,,(robotic and drone like, no real personality or ability to communicate)

mostly character flaws send me red flags, because character doesnt change as quickly and often as the physical,, its more likely what one will be living with for the longest haul , in a commitment.

I think we all have some different red flags due to past relationships

Depending on who you ask the issues will be different and have different priorities.

I hate liars.
I have gotten fairly good at spotting lies.

For me, I can tolerate a lie here or there but every lie I detect is accumulative over time.

I pay attention to details and have a really good memory.

I also have a pretty good understanding of personality types and the traits of consistent liars.

I lived 27 years with a compulsive liar.

I can deal with almost anything except lying.

The few other things that are deal-breakers if missing or inadequate in my book:

Personal cleanliness, not only of the body but their living style.
Respect for other people's feelings
Ability to demonstrate intelligence
Emotional maturity
Self-sufficiency
Health, can have health issues but must be at least trying to manage it.
Non-destructive to themselves or others

Not sure if this is what you're looking for but it is the way I understood it.

I agree with sipsik
And yes. I spot red flags very quickly, and run as fast and as far away as I can when I do.

Ps: And just know that others are just as diligent in spotting the red flags in us . We're not as easy to deal with as we think

Seems like you're basically saying "has anyone noticed that the longer you spend using internet dating it becomes more apparent that you're scraping the bottom of the dating pool?"

Red flags, yes... hmm okay... but what's wrong with 50 Shades of Grey?
I'm about to publish in the genre... Got a contract for 4 books as a matter of fact. I don't consider that a red flag, haha.
Neither does he btw, he likes me being erm... creative.

As for the lady, maybe you should've asked a different way. And maybe be less focused on looks, great bodies and so on... A guy who is overly focused on looks and hot bodies is a MAJOR red flag to me

"Red Flags," especially the instant ones, are not only illustrative of the person you are reacting to, they are illustrative of yourself.

I don't think that's true in all people.

I learned a long time ago to lead by example.

To me that means that any standards I require from others I hold for myself.

I can accept others for who they are but it doesn't mean I want an intimate relationship with them.

thats right

welcome to my world

correct!

I'm not trying to be judgmental here but if I see a red flag. I
run for the hills as fast as I can. Life is short I want
to spend it being happy & positive. There are certain things to
consider even though we all have some past scar's from relationships
that we factor in our choices.

I think finding someone we are compatible with is hard enough let
alone trying to deal with crazy to. So I kick the crazy in the bar
ditch a move along.

I feel omission is betrayal.

I get you becouse some do not post recent photos of them selves ... but she may have felt... he is all about looks when you asked ... or she could have been a scammer or what ever ... you will never know unless she contacts you again ... and then you better be the one running lol

since my divorced...


I have been asked out a lot ...
but felt the ones ...I really where attracted to where a just sexual attraction ... no did not go through with either of them ... now the others I went out with all red flags after I talked with them ... an worse when I met them ... thought I would at least give them a chance ... but none peaked my interest... where I was or had butterfly's in my stomach ... looking forward in meeting them ... those where all red flags ... My picture profile in here ...is real and was taken last yr ... but I am one not to keep a lot of pictures in here ... mainly don't want to be bothered lol I had this friend once live in another country ... he was so funny every time we talked he asked for naked pictures of me ... of course said no way ... he was in love with this other girl so we talked about her alot while he played his game on line ... he worked but that was the wkend so every time I bugged him he would say send me pictures ... I was always doing something on line to ..but we had our windows open for each other ...
to chat ... I miss some of those friends I made ... but as some would say ...which I will not say ... lmao but some times you miss the red flag I have once or twice ... so it may not just have been you ...

I have gotten so comfortable with doing this solo act that I see a pink flag I out the door; Red flag getting the digits; forget it.