im not trying to come across as a know it all but i have noticed some things in these forums lately that some of us being the older crowd might need to take a look at:seems to me since the merge that we have picked up a few more younger members and though they may have names that say one thing if you read what their saying you find that some have some real issues that could use a little more compassion and empathy rather than some of the harsh words and judgements that have been passed their way.Some of these members are the age of our kids and we need to read a little between the lines because they do have real problems and rather than being so quick with our witticism,i think there is a couple who may benefit from some fatherly and motherly advice.true i know this is a dating site but maybe they have no one else to talk to and theyve come here.dont shoot the messenger and you can vote this for deletion if you wish but i think some of you have seen this also.i know weve come here to date but i for one dont see the harm in trying to be more understanding versus what kind of underwear im wearing.i try not to post anything i just thought this needed some attention..not meant to offend anyone



<---- does not wear underwear in here,now you know..

good post and i do agree Tomb.i haven't been here for very long and i'm still young but i see what you mean

I agree 100%. All too often, I see someone post a legitimate question, and someone doesn't like the way it's phrased and automatically accuses that person of "whining." If we stop and try to see the issue from the poster's point of view, and realize that we don't all word things exactly the same way, then it could just be that what's "whining" to us, may not be intended that way at all.

A little tolerance is a good thing. I'm not saying there aren't times when somebody goes too far, and needs to be taken aside and "advised," so to speak, but those are really pretty infrequent, and shouldn't be used as a basis for jumping all over the next guy just because we don't approve of the way he said what he had to say.

Tombraider, I like your suggestion for "compassion and empathy." If we were new here, just starting out, isn't that how we would wish to be greeted? Let's take a look at the other person's side every now and then....

i agree lex i have found myself guilty of this also thats why the post

Guilty as charged, Sir.

oh so its kinda like confession?great post btw

hi lex!

not so much a confession other than the fact that it was something that need said i included myself,

some timesw we come here not 100%at the ready and this was not meant to throw stones as it was to make all myself included aware

I think most of us HAVE done it at some point, and probably not consciously, and probably not with the full awareness of how it might look, or how it might be interpreted. With that in mind, Tombraider's post is a good lesson for everybody here. Today's newbies are tomorrow's elders -- let's, at the very least, try and set a decent precedent for them.

And Hi to you, SB!

Sometimes its easy to forget that some of these folks are new. Most here try to respect folks. And jump on transgressors.Been on both sides of that myself. But, on almost every thread, the chatting is done with respect.

yeah i agree lex,if newbies are taught to not actually read the post,then nobody gets help and they will leave and its just a bad cycle

I accept for young people to whine and carryon they are still learning things in life but by jingles if they are people my age group and over, sorry, I will tell 'em to grow up. Yea, thats harsh too bad. I am being honest.

Being upfront don't mean I lack compassion ...people will not grow if we feel sorry for everyone we come across. Yes, I agree some people have genuine problems and I don't mind helping them out on the side and I will still be upfront with my responses. It's my free time in my life, sharing my opinions of what they air on this forum.

Part of learning things for a youngster is "patience" we all been there and that is what I would advice them

If they wanna be cool then they shuttup and listen to me!!!