Please be sincere with your answers. Have you ever snooped on your partner? If yes/no give your reasons.

never have.
if he doubts me, he doesn't know what I'm about.
if I were to doubt him, it means we haven't built a solid foundation.

What do you mean by snooped?

No
and he didn't need to snoop on me because I would tell him everything
had nothing to hide.

These are lovely sincere replys ladys being in a relationship where openess and honesty and trust are never questioned awesome

NO, I never snooped, no one ever gave me reason. I'm the trusting type anyway. The other way round I agree with Annie, always up front and honest, only way a relationship works.

You raise a point I was pondering on. when your given reason to snoop or investigate to protect oneself from misplaced trust I have snooped in this situation it was a case of financial infidelity I actually glad I did over time she had developed a gambling addiction and shame and denial stopped her from being open and honest with me .Which was hard to comprehend at first because I considered myself as very understanding nearly lost everything but oh its only money

Well, addictions are never rational, and shame is a very powerful emotion. You never want to let the person you love down.

When trust is broken and the signs are hitting you in the face
then you have to do something. When it comes to addiction, you may actually be saving someone.

Kool reply dude totally agree

The old saying "Two wrongs do not make a right" applies here.

I totally disagree with if things look wrong and you suspect addiction that you should snoop. That only pours gasoline on a fire. If you suspect that you are dealing with problems related to and addiction in a relationship with a significant other in a committed relationship then educate yourself about your resources and the subject then face to face address the issue with your partner in a safe place. Betraying someone in crisis is not going to help anyone.

You have the right to protect yourself and I would suggest you do that but snooping in ways that violate your honor makes you just as sick as the addict.

Thanku I enjoyed your prospective on this topic a very measured and educated approach .if i may clarify a few points

If you have to snoop, it really isn't a relationship in the loving, trusting sense anymore. It is now based on fear and distrust.

I still do not understand snoop? Is it reading emails, texts or like following them?

Yep, that could all be snooping. Although, following is also stalking.

No, I have not.
I have been snooped on and it is such a violation. Especially when the mistrust is in their head.
I agree with you though Norcal, when addictions are involved they can not be trusted and confront with love and point them towards help.
Addictions ruin marriages.

Yes I belive your statement to be true in the most literal sence however I do wonder if its that clearly defined in the depths of a long term relationship

If you look at the statistics of divorce, long term is getting shorter.

Yes I have and wholeheartedly regretted it. A) because it ain't right and B) because my intuition turned out to be right.
Then you're stuck with the question: What am I gonna do with the knowledge?
Him angry cause I snooped, me angry cause of what he'd done.
So yeah, I had done something wrong, but so had he ...

Very true I haven't looked at any divorce statz however just thinkin about present and past generationz just in my own family my great grandparents and grandparent's had long term marriages in the till death do us part sence of the word

Average length of marriage around the world

Rome, Italy — 18 years

Stockholm, Sweden 15 years

Ottawa, Canada — 13.8 years

Paris, France — 13 years

New York City — 12.2 years

Sydney, Australia — 12 years

Mexico City, Mexico — 12 years

Tokyo, Japan — 11 years

London, England — 11 years

Cape Town, South Africa — 11 years

Doha, Qatar — 5.5 years


The Swedish word for poison is Gift and the Swedish word for marriage is Gift