Hi......Looking4u52,

Chemistry is not needed to be in love, but if you have it, it is often a very powerful love that will take you to emotional levels that exceed anything imaginable. The key is to be open to feel and experience your true emotions. Sometimes people are so stressed and worried about so many things that they don’t loosen up enough to feel a chemistry that could be there.

Release your inhibitions and feel whatever attractions are there to feel. You may be suddenly surprised by the fact that the person, who was only your friend for so long, is actually your soul mate and the "Chemistry" between you.....,takes you through the roof!

Don’t be so distracted that you overlook the obvious. Sometimes what you are looking for is right in front of you!

Keep the................."Goatee", you wear it well !!!

Good Luck...................Benz !!!

Puffins, that was a very thoughtful reply.
I agree it is what is on the inside that counts.
Life can be so confusing. Chemistry and attraction can
seem so shallow. But, is a main ingredient in romantic
relationships. I guess I have been lucky.

personally I am attracted to beards and stashes. My husband could not grow hair on his face and I am attracted to totally someone different from him, personality, height, etc.

Hi Benz, thank you for your thoughts. I know a couple
who were just friends and then later had the chemistry
develop. They seem to have a great relationship. Things
just don't usually develop in that order.

Anyway, based on the responses I'll keep the facial hair.
At least we can end that part of the discussion.

I hear you...,It is not "Chemistry" that we are really looking for in a relationship..., I think it's more of an "Attraction", that leads to the "Chemistry" over a period of time.

Often people try too hard to find the right person and in doing this they miss noticing whom the right person is, even when they are in front of them. Sometimes it is necessary to simply be yourself and go about your business.

It seems that only when we stop looking, do we often find what we are looking for. There is something about being in a state of search, which tends to distract a person from what really is. By being yourself and by doing things that make you happy as an individual, you shine with a luring charisma, which attracts your true love to you without looking for them. This is a sort of effortless and magical experience when it happens to you. Which later on in the relationship, can become "Chemistry"..!!!

Take Care & Welcome......Good Luck..........Benz !!!

Unfortunately people change and there are so many people who are good looking and have shi** attitudes. Once you find someone that has most of the things you seek in a partner then it is up to you to except any changes if you want the relationship to grow long term. Maybe if everyone sought out the good in a person rather then these impossible qualities that one person can not live up to, then we would probably not need online dating sites.

Humm regardless unless there is and attraction and chemistry then most will not look any farther for there has to be something there that catches your attention first. Before one will seek to look farther not talking drop dead beautiful but at least pleasing to the eye of the beholder. And for me yes I want the chemistry there.

But regardless if it is there one must work at what they have found kinda like silver if you don't polish it once in a while it will become tarnish. You can't expect to find it wine and dine them and treat them like a million dollars. Then through them in the corner and expect everything will remain like it was.

sssssssshhh that is what happens with most relationships they expect things to continue like it was and they don't have to do anything more they figure well I have them now so they should just be happy with that and move right along.

It don't work that way you did things before for them why did you stop? One must work at what they want.

I don't see that most guys just cause they buy a car they expect it to stay like it is. ohhh no they wash it they clean it have a tune up done new tires cause they know if they don't pamper it it will finally break down and quit running Hellllooo just like a relationship. If you do not put and effort into keeping it like it was in the beginning guess what it will also fall to the way side.

Anything worth having that your really want then you must take the time to keep it that way. But it takes both putting in 100% or it will never hold up.

TxsGal, sounds like you are right on. If we were all as smart as you maybe relationships would work out for the longer term.
Or is this something people figure out after it is too late?

I must say that the folks on this discussion board have made
some really good points.

So do you think if you had a relationship with the chemistry and
attraction and things fell apart that one should go back and try again with that person, provided the chemistry and attraction still exists?

It takes some work to keep the chemistry going. You also have to meet each other half way (honesty and communication). If you don't have either -- why bother!

"if at 1st you don't succeed, try try again, then quit. it is no use making a d*mn fool out of yourself"

W. C. Fields

You're right -- I just had my ass kicked because I believed in doing the right thing for my man. So, when he forgot I really was a good woman -- I realized it was time for me to leave.

Bee yourself. Robin Williams' line from Alladin while he was doing the genie that was doing the bee.

I guess difficult part is should I stay or should I go.
If there is no chemistry or attraction it is pretty easy
to move on. But .............

Yeah. Definately elusive like Big Bird taking advice from his invisible friend Snuffalufugus. Sure is nice to have friends that can understand you whether they exist or not is somebody's else's problem. Doesn't has to be yours.

for hillfolk....

mayday....mayday...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h0SO5ACenQM

Want me to sting her? Thanks for the link.

I think you need to seperate them first.

There is physical attraction: how turned on you get by the other persons looks

There is emotional attraction: How attracted you are to there likes, hobbys, the way there brain and heart work

Physical Chemistry: How well your physical aspect's work together like being active or laid back, or how well you mesh with sex and dancing

Emotional Chemistry: How well you work with that person on an emotional level, like how you deal with fights, or finaces, day to day life.

I think physical chemistry is underated. I think physical attraction is important but not a deal breaker. Both of those can be changed or delt with over time. Emotional attraction is either there or not, just like phsyical attraction, thats the spark. Emotional chemistry though, i think is the most important one peroid. It's the one that shows if your going to last or not. I hear everyone talk about wanting a best friend and lover. Thats emotional chemistery..the best friend part. Best friend and lover i would guess would be physical attraction and emotional chemistry. You dont really need to like the same things, nor do you need to complament the other physically. I've known plenty of klutz's that are with cordinated people. They worked out fine