Why are you single?

Did you move too often because of a job or the family?

Did you have any long term relationships or it was just a series of NSA adventures?

Question for those with kids but never married - why didn't you marry? What went wrong?

I'm not over 45+ but I want to comment and say who says 'something went wrong' if someone didn't give into the stereo type of having to be married to have a family? just curious.

Stereo-types are common in society and they are not reserved exclusively for any specific race/sex/age/profession/ group.

That is not a topic.

So, you decided to have kids and not to marry the mother of your children. why?

Nope no kids, but after being married once, and divorced once and knowing how difficult was without kids, and watching friends with kids go through the same process I was able to see how much more difficult it was for them. I decided kids or not I will most likely never marry again. The couples I see that divorce with kids normally turns really ugly, and VERY few ever get back together, the couples i know that that aren't married but have kids, MOST have gotten back together after little splits, and most are STILL together.

I have come to similar conclusions (*).
Thank you for the reply!

P.S.

@isaac_dede

Kids change everything.
When my parents divorced mother re-married, but father lived alone till the rest of his life.
I was married and without kids for over twenty years.
My brother has kids and few UGLY divorces behind him, so I agree with you ... those who have kids and divorce RARELY (if ever!) get back together.

Sorry to say this if you have your conclusion already why ask .

It depends on the situation don't you think.
What went rite not what went wrong.
What went rite was it for the best interest of your kids.
What went rite you chose their safety before your own.
What went rite the love you see in your kids eyes when they look up at you...
No wrongs just a spark of life an hope you see in your kids eyes....

Just saying my bad if I upset yahh peace out

Expressing different opinion is not disturbing the peace. Why would it be? It is impossible for all of us to agree on everything because we are different personalities and our life experiences may be totally opposite, so... every honest reply is taken as is. No peace disturbance here LOL

P.S.
Also no conclusions either. I ASKED the questions and appreciate honest answers, whether I like them or not.

I agree different personality, different opinions.
Everyone you come across will always leave footprints in your memory's..
But the ones that leaves footprints in our hearts are the ones we will always remember. ..
only time will tell when those toe jam footprints won't hurt any more. Lol

I seem to attract a lot of men in their 40s who have never been married....the man I'm with has no kids and never been married...I asked him what's wrong with him...he said he never met the one woman he wanted to spend his life with.....I guess it can happen...I believe he just to be a player.....lol and his game got lame.....that's my boo though....

There's something wrong with you if you've never been married in your 40's, but nothing wrong with you if you've been married and divorced multiple times. Yeah that makes sense.

Time gives answers, heals wounds and makes it easier to live after some painful experiences. They might still hurt, but one learns how to let go and give a chance to someone or something new.
We need time in order for things to settle down and to gain a backward and forward perspective - to realise why we were there and where to go from here. We need time for re-establishing peace and calm.
So, yes, you are right, time will tell...

I trust my feelings. If something is wrong and I am not sure what it is, I'll try to put a finger on it. If I can't find out what it is and do not feel comfortable, I'll walk away. Perhaps that is too cautious?

Who said that? I asked the questions to hear the answers. So, if you want to share an opinion, you are welcomed to do so here.

I know someone who lived on few continents, but never stayed anywhere long enough to settle down and get into serious relationship.
Let's keep in mind that there are people who work a lot and have to take care of their family. They do not have much time left for anyone else and it takes time to build a relationship.
There are other examples as well.
Perhaps the way I asked the questions is provocative, but it is intentionally so in order to get your response.
These are not things most people like to talk about, so I am not really expecting too many replies.

I have been married so not the best to answer your questions...

However, looking back, I would have been better off not getting married to the wrong person...It would have been better to remain unmarried...

If I was to marry again, it would come with a detailed pre-nuptial agreement...

So to those of you who have never been married, "take your time and don't buy into society's lie that happiness and marriage are somehow related"...they are NOT

I am sorry to hear that you had such an experience. I guess once the trust is lost it is very hard to regain it, if it is possible at all.
You gave very good advice to those who are considering marriage. It is true that it does not guarantee happiness. So, considering some possible issues in advance is a good idea.
It is not easy to be a single parent, so I wish you to keep your health and your job and to find a true happiness with someone who will love you just as you are, not because of what you own!

I have a son who is 43 and he has dated quite a few women for extended periods of time but has not found the one he feels he would want to spend the rest of his life with. He has never been in a rush to get married and he isn't in a hurry to have kids either though he would make a great dad. Actually I very much respect his choices in his life. He has used a lot of good common sense. If he did find someone he would be in it for keeps.

I hope he will find a keeper.
I wish my brother was less impulsive in his decision making. His kids didn't deserve to feel the pain caused by those ugly brake-ups. On the other hand, he does not understand why I live alone, as if it a MUST to have someone, anyone, next to you.
Why would it be?
If and when the right person comes, I shall know it for sure. I'd rather be alone than lonely next to the wrong one.
See, even when raised the same way we can see things differently?
That's life!

absolutely! I have one brother who has beem married for almost 20yrs, 2 kids, another brother who has a kid by his second wife, but is now married to his third wife. and you already know my views...

oh and If I were to consider marriage again most likely a prenup would be a must