Topic: Non-Married | |
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For the people who haven't been married yet, do you think the idea of marriage is the be all end all or do you feel otherwise? Do you find it daunting to make a commitment to one person for the rest of your life? Are you apprehensive the other person won't care enough to make it work with you?
Do you not at all see it in your future? Possibly because of bad experiences, family divorces or, if you aren't opposed to it, are you just not in that right place for such a decision? If the last one is true, do you see yourself ever taking the risk to be married? |
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Personally, I know I'm not in the right place in my life for the daunting effort to try n make a relationship work for marriage. Considering my last relationship (about 3 years) had been the longest I have had, and when I saw something was a miss. I tried to talk and find out what I could do to try n make the relationship not seem so stale or what was wrong. She in turn decided that the best thing for us was to break up and remain friends. We are still friends, just no where near as close as friends as we had been.
With that now being said, I think some of you maybe able to understand some of my apprehensiveness about dating in general. I'm trying to gain a full love for myself first, before attempting to date. Probably because of my condition, I literally beat the hell out of myself for having the last relationship end the way it did. Of course the last date I did have a couple months after was just a disaster. That's when I made the decision I have made. Do I think about marriage and family life? Of course I do, then realize unless my partner is willing to adopt, or if she has kids from a previous relationship. That is the only way we're going to have a family, as I am not able to produce offspring. |
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I have learned my lesson.
No, I won't consider marriage again. If you live together in Texas and meet some criteria, you could be subject to common law. I'll make sure that doesn't happen. I feel, a commitment doesn't have to include court papers. |
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for my buddies above me.
I've seen marriages flourished & also have seen other marriages deteriorating before my eyes. Marriage is a beauty thing - I just don't see it in my future. |
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For the people who haven't been married yet, do you think the idea of marriage is the be all end all or do you feel otherwise? Do you find it daunting to make a commitment to one person for the rest of your life? Are you apprehensive the other person won't care enough to make it work with you? Do you not at all see it in your future? Possibly because of bad experiences, family divorces or, if you aren't opposed to it, are you just not in that right place for such a decision? If the last one is true, do you see yourself ever taking the risk to be married? Funny that I was asked precisely this question today by one of my friends here. I can answer because I have nothing to hide. My biological dad abandoned us when I was a baby. I grew up feeling I was unloveable. Just things a kid imagines because I had a wonderful step dad who loved me like his own from the time I was 3. Until he passed away when I was seventeen. In between that time I became afraid of men when I was a curvaceous but ignorant teenager and a friend of the family tried to have his way with me. It took me a while to realize that the fear magnified the incident to more than what it had been. To learn not to judge all men by one piece of garbage. I'm not opposed to marriage, but I want to know a man first and be friends, get to really know someone before establishing a lifelong relationship. Because when I do get married, I hope for it to be for us to grow old together. |
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"You'd be a brilliant first divorce."
My girlfriend loves the things I say to her. |
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For the people who haven't been married yet, do you think the idea of marriage is the be all end all or do you feel otherwise? Do you find it daunting to make a commitment to one person for the rest of your life? Are you apprehensive the other person won't care enough to make it work with you? Do you not at all see it in your future? Possibly because of bad experiences, family divorces or, if you aren't opposed to it, are you just not in that right place for such a decision? If the last one is true, do you see yourself ever taking the risk to be married? Funny that I was asked precisely this question today by one of my friends here. I can answer because I have nothing to hide. My biological dad abandoned us when I was a baby. I grew up feeling I was unloveable. Just things a kid imagines because I had a wonderful step dad who loved me like his own from the time I was 3. Until he passed away when I was seventeen. In between that time I became afraid of men when I was a curvaceous but ignorant teenager and a friend of the family tried to have his way with me. It took me a while to realize that the fear magnified the incident to more than what it had been. To learn not to judge all men by one piece of garbage. I'm not opposed to marriage, but I want to know a man first and be friends, get to really know someone before establishing a lifelong relationship. Because when I do get married, I hope for it to be for us to grow old together. Thanks for sharing this story. Was honest and raw, one of the best answers I've read...especially the last sentence. |
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I have seen so many happy couples go sour after tying the knot. I'm afraid of that happening to me so I adopted the "its just a piece of paper" saying. Marriage is a promise and I hate promise breaking.
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Edited by
jacktrades
on
Sat 07/12/14 12:51 AM
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I am not opposed to marriage but all your points are well taken. I am the last of my friends who is single, they are all married but I have seen horror stories and seen people trying to destroy each others live's as it ended so I would not get married unless I truly felt I could not live without her.
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