I have had several exchanges from people who seem to not get that nuclear family planning choices are not always compatible irregardless of age. I am not looking to debated birth control but more what peoples experiences are with comingleing families even adult children living in? Perhaps dependent siblings or parents? What limits would you set on emergency assistance to "family'? Any opinions on the subject? When should this issue be addressed? Do you think prenups are a solution? Would you date someone who had significantly different goals? If so why? If not; why? How do you handle being put on the spot to defend such decisions?

I love the idea that, no matter what kind of family
you were born with, as an adult you can make any
type of family you want to.

It would be most helpful if your mate felt the same.

My mate and I have co-mingled 5 cats with one dog
who wishes to eat them.

So far, so good :-)

That's my kind of dog.

I think for children it is best for them to have a mother and father as foundation of their home.

as far as a family unit, a family is ,according to how I was raised, always welcome so long as everyone is contributing their share to the household, so comingling isn't a problem in my culture

the only issue is with setting boundaries and spaces that are designated for each individual adult and those which are common areas..lol

I would never do a prenup, but Im not planning on a government marriage again anyway so it doesn't matter

I wouldn't date someone with significantly different goals, life is too peaceful without such stress. Id prefer someone working towards COMMON goals with me

I don't handle being put on the spot for any reason very well, I don't do it to others I love and I expect more from others who claim to love me

Hmmmm.
How about if I slather a picture of you with beef gravy.
See how the dog likes YOU :-)

The idea of just not dating someone with different goals/situations seems pretty reasonable to me. Even considerate.

I have run into some getting really hostile like not wanting to raise their children or even grandchildren as some kind of personal attack on them, hating children, or not being "female".

As someone who has parented many times over for years I thought it was fine to have an empty nest. I didn't bust anyone's chops when they weren't into parenting when I was.

I would not have been hot for the pre-nup idea for a lot of reasons but the number of divorces I am seeing in long standing marriages and dating horror stories I am hearing about situations with "adult" children I am not sure it isn't a good idea. Don't know about other states but here in California if a spouse tells someone they can move in even if the other spouse is against it they are stuck. Making me seriously think about the "bigger" picture.

Soufie would think that would interesting. lol I just got a special bird avairy for my Parakeets because considering another pet. My neighbors cat and dog sleep together.

It would probably work better if you slathered the picture with cat gravy.
To make it, you need at least one cat.
So, which of your 5 are you the least fond of?

I will not respond to being put on the spot in a personal situation. Those who know me personally would, I think, agree that it's not a good idea to do that to me. Therefore it really never happens....and with the newly acquainted ...never for a second time.

I have serious reservations about cohabiting under any circumstances with anyone...unless it is with one of my children. If it were with a partner (romantic) neither would invite another - no matter who it is - to live with us w/out mutual decision making. I am not known to want to spend a lot of time with a partner's family. that is prolly not gonna change. I would not cohabitate or marry without a prenup.

I'm fairly open minded about it but then, I've never actually lived with a partner and I don't have any children myself that I know of.

Let's see if I've got it straight, Pacific (you do appear to have your very own personal articulation of english after all):

If you've got a massive ego, working on the presumption that you would seek out other people with massive egos to date, what do you do when you have a personality clash?

Well, the idea is to pick someone compatable as a primary requisite whether or not egotism is involved in your life.
You're just basically wondering if you can just pick someone with an ego as big as yours and not worry about compatability.

And wow that's an extra big ego to even think like that O_o


Not that there's necessarily anything wrong with having a massive ego, each to their own, the world and people are ideally diverse, ego is not a dirty word according to The Skyhooks (70s music), so it shouldn't be a secret. One can be proudly egotistical and that's just fine and lawful and all the rest.
But if it wasn't a secret, if you were normal about yourself, then you'd have seen straight off the very topic question is its own obvious answer. It is literally an answer rewritten as a question.