Previous 1
Topic: When it turns to Stalking?
teebee79's photo
Tue 12/31/13 06:36 AM
I've mentioned many a times in threads... I'm getting over an Ex. Have decided since, to just relax with " Looking for the one" and take my time.
I have many male friends. Every last one of them, have zero chance of hooking up with me... and they know this.

Which is why I hear from them every now and then... They might ask me to attend parties or ask me to hang out with them and other friends... a basic friendship!

BUT I have one guy friend, I think is turning more stalker than friend? Here's why?
He texts me EVERYDAY, 3 times a day, GM Tee.. How's your day going Tee, Good Night Tee, I hope you had a great day.
Then, he'll send messages like " When can we meet up.. it's been so long since I've seen you" " I need my Tee shot"... " It's your world, i'm just happy to be in it"

Everytime I remind him" We are just friends" He says " Oh yeah, I know.. I'm seeing Susie ( or whomever he says) and it's getting serious!

He's attached to me for some odd reason!!
I wanted to be friends but each day, I see that's not possible.

no photo
Tue 12/31/13 07:05 AM
Hi Tee

Is this the same guy who was your friend in your OP in the "too picky" thread?

SparklingCrystal 💖💎's photo
Tue 12/31/13 07:10 AM
Edited by SparklingCrystal 💖💎 on Tue 12/31/13 07:13 AM
I think you should voice your "just friends" a lot stronger. Sounds like you're too gentle and subtle. Some people just don't seem to get a simple, subtle message.
Maybe not wait for him to send another message, but get in touch with him yourself and tell him your feelings, that you do NOT want him to send you messages all the time.
If it feels like you can get away with it (and that depends on how sane he is/feels), maybe throw in that you feel like you're being stalked and you do NOT wish to feel that way.
That might hit home. Maybe even tell him straight in his face whilst looking in his eyes --> If he can see your face, any sane man would see that you are dead serious.
You can also get other, mutual friends involved.
If he feels like a nutter, you might want to go for a more serious (legal) approach.

teebee79's photo
Tue 12/31/13 07:23 AM

Hi Tee

Is this the same guy who was your friend in your OP in the "too picky" thread?

YES!!! He is sweet... but He is just getting like this EVERYDAY!!!
I'll have to cut him loose...


teebee79's photo
Tue 12/31/13 07:29 AM

I think you should voice your "just friends" a lot stronger. Sounds like you're too gentle and subtle. Some people just don't seem to get a simple, subtle message.
Maybe not wait for him to send another message, but get in touch with him yourself and tell him your feelings, that you do NOT want him to send you messages all the time.
If it feels like you can get away with it (and that depends on how sane he is/feels), maybe throw in that you feel like you're being stalked and you do NOT wish to feel that way.
That might hit home. Maybe even tell him straight in his face whilst looking in his eyes --> If he can see your face, any sane man would see that you are dead serious.
You can also get other, mutual friends involved.
If he feels like a nutter, you might want to go for a more serious (legal) approach.

I normally don't mince words with him, it's WE ARE NOT DATING, you know that Right "SHAWN"?? He says " oh yeah..I know!
I'm seeing blah blah and it's getting really serious"
Then the next text from him " I had to break up with blah blah, she was still seeing her ex... she was getting more invovled than I was"

I think I will just have to cut him loose completely. I feel bad because he was great to talk to, well until he said" It's your world I'm just happy to be in your world"

Does this creep anyone else out? I haven't checked my phone but I know I have a message right now, and another one is comeing in about an hour... and the final one will be at 9pm Eastern Standard time!

no photo
Tue 12/31/13 07:32 AM
He sounds like another one who can't leave their cell phone alone for one minute. Always texting. Telling people about every little thing.

no photo
Tue 12/31/13 07:44 AM
It's kinda sad really. You said he's a nice guy, but have you said that he sees you as a couple, I mean he says to you he wants to be with you as in a couple?

I guess I'm trying to paint a picture of this. He keeps saying "your together" or what? Or do you think it maybe a case where he is saying one thing and your taking it differently?

I've had friends that I went out with and we acted like a couple but completely friends that checked up on each other, but I guess what your saying is he is saying your in a dating "love" thing?

I hate to see anyone get hurt, but if he's thinking one thing and you another, I guess....kinda sad though.

teebee79's photo
Tue 12/31/13 07:56 AM

It's kinda sad really. You said he's a nice guy, but have you said that he sees you as a couple, I mean he says to you he wants to be with you as in a couple?

I guess I'm trying to paint a picture of this. He keeps saying "your together" or what? Or do you think it maybe a case where he is saying one thing and your taking it differently?

I've had friends that I went out with and we acted like a couple but completely friends that checked up on each other, but I guess what your saying is he is saying your in a dating "love" thing?

I hate to see anyone get hurt, but if he's thinking one thing and you another, I guess....kinda sad though.

It's VERY sad actually..
I've never said or done anything to the contrary of how I feel for him.. AS A FRIEND

He on the other hand, texts everyday.. not figuratively..literally!
I don't text my FAMILY everyday!...3 times a day!

and it's the nature of some of those texts... " I need Tee in my life".. " It's your world Tee"

I've never said anything like this to my best of bestest friends!

I'm not a teaser. I've never called him when I'm feeling sexy to get confirmation from him.. I've never kissed him around people or alone because I'm drunk! I have always been clear as crystal with him.
The last time He and I met up was early November but again he said creepy , stalker like phrases.

Yeah.. i'm gonna block him

no photo
Tue 12/31/13 08:04 AM


It's kinda sad really. You said he's a nice guy, but have you said that he sees you as a couple, I mean he says to you he wants to be with you as in a couple?

I guess I'm trying to paint a picture of this. He keeps saying "your together" or what? Or do you think it maybe a case where he is saying one thing and your taking it differently?

I've had friends that I went out with and we acted like a couple but completely friends that checked up on each other, but I guess what your saying is he is saying your in a dating "love" thing?

I hate to see anyone get hurt, but if he's thinking one thing and you another, I guess....kinda sad though.

It's VERY sad actually..
I've never said or done anything to the contrary of how I feel for him.. AS A FRIEND

He on the other hand, texts everyday.. not figuratively..literally!
I don't text my FAMILY everyday!...3 times a day!

and it's the nature of some of those texts... " I need Tee in my life".. " It's your world Tee"

I've never said anything like this to my best of bestest friends!

I'm not a teaser. I've never called him when I'm feeling sexy to get confirmation from him.. I've never kissed him around people or alone because I'm drunk! I have always been clear as crystal with him.
The last time He and I met up was early November but again he said creepy , stalker like phrases.

Yeah.. i'm gonna block him


Yep, sounds like the best thing maybe. Now I'm a little creeped out for you. He wouldn't do anything weird would he? Not to put fear where it doesn't belong but I was stalked twice and it wasn't fun.

no photo
Tue 12/31/13 08:11 AM
Edited by sweetestgirl11 on Tue 12/31/13 08:15 AM
I think he sounds really nice, but then I would not object having a friend speak with me on a daily basis. My suggestion - because really GOOD friends are too hard to find to risk losing one - is simply do not respond each time he calls or texts. If he texts 3 times in one day, perhaps respond to all 3 that evening or the next day. You can also gradually make yourself less available to him in small ways.

You might have to come clean and explain why if he persists but hopefully not as no one wants to hurt the feelings of a true friend.

I don't think he sounds like he is stalking you. I wonder why what he says bothers you so much? Just let it go....

oldhippie1952's photo
Tue 12/31/13 08:13 AM
Well tee, you're cute so now you have someone as a friend who wants more I take it?

no photo
Tue 12/31/13 08:15 AM

I think he sounds really nice, but then I would not object having a friend speak with me on a daily basis. My suggestion - because really GOOD friends are too hard to find to risk losing one - is simply do not respond each time he calls or texts. If he texts 3 times in one day, perhaps respond to all 3 that evening or the next day. You can also gradually make yourself less available to him in small ways.

You might have to come clean and explain why if he persists but hopefully not as no one wants to hurt the feelings of a true friend.


^^Good advice...Kindness rules!flowerforyou

no photo
Tue 12/31/13 08:21 AM


I think he sounds really nice, but then I would not object having a friend speak with me on a daily basis. My suggestion - because really GOOD friends are too hard to find to risk losing one - is simply do not respond each time he calls or texts. If he texts 3 times in one day, perhaps respond to all 3 that evening or the next day. You can also gradually make yourself less available to him in small ways.

You might have to come clean and explain why if he persists but hopefully not as no one wants to hurt the feelings of a true friend.


^^Good advice...Kindness rules!flowerforyou


Hey there! Hope you had a good holiday!

Honestly part of me is thinking gee it might be nice to have someone messaging.....I know for myself I do not have the luxury of being surrounded by constantly texting males to be able to just toss one out. lollaugh

(I'm getting an amusing visual here....lol)waving

no photo
Tue 12/31/13 08:23 AM
Yep, sorry guys, I think my brother instincts started to kick in there. I would hate to see a good friend get the axe, but I got that other side saying play it safe too.

I need to put on the Kinks and shutup.

that's better :)

no photo
Tue 12/31/13 08:27 AM



I think he sounds really nice, but then I would not object having a friend speak with me on a daily basis. My suggestion - because really GOOD friends are too hard to find to risk losing one - is simply do not respond each time he calls or texts. If he texts 3 times in one day, perhaps respond to all 3 that evening or the next day. You can also gradually make yourself less available to him in small ways.

You might have to come clean and explain why if he persists but hopefully not as no one wants to hurt the feelings of a true friend.


^^Good advice...Kindness rules!flowerforyou


Hey there! Hope you had a good holiday!

Honestly part of me is thinking gee it might be nice to have someone messaging.....I know for myself I do not have the luxury of being surrounded by constantly texting males to be able to just toss one out. lollaugh

(I'm getting an amusing visual here....lol)waving


Thanks ((((Sweet)))), it was OK:tongue: ...I'm looking forward to a New Year!drinker ...Whatever your plans tonight, have fun, be safe, and know I think the world of you!flowerforyou

teebee79's photo
Tue 12/31/13 01:00 PM

Well tee, you're cute so now you have someone as a friend who wants more I take it?

Awwe thank you :) yeah...im feeling he wants more even though Ive told him on numerous accounts that we are not together...I do not like him romantically. He claims to get it but still makes inappropriate comments. I just want a friend...not someone waiting in the wings hoping for a shot.

Shy_Emo_chick's photo
Tue 12/31/13 01:03 PM
Just block the guy

no photo
Tue 12/31/13 01:08 PM
Some men don't give up easily. I've had this happen to me. Why do you find this creepy?

no photo
Tue 12/31/13 06:17 PM


Well tee, you're cute so now you have someone as a friend who wants more I take it?

Awwe thank you :) yeah...im feeling he wants more even though Ive told him on numerous accounts that we are not together...I do not like him romantically. He claims to get it but still makes inappropriate comments. I just want a friend...not someone waiting in the wings hoping for a shot.


I tend to live by the rule of thumb that goes..."if it's male, it will be waiting in the wings for a shot ...no matter what it says otherwise..."

lol Happy New Year!

no photo
Tue 12/31/13 06:20 PM
I'm a Stalkersmokin ..............if I likey youuuuuusssssdrool

Previous 1