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Topic: between the ages
lovetravelwithu's photo
Sun 10/27/13 08:58 AM
Edited by lovetravelwithu on Sun 10/27/13 09:00 AM
I have recently met a wonderful man but there is a big age difference.He is 48 I'm 59. He is a wonderful person and as we converse we find more and more in common.The age does worry me though he says not to worry.I do seem to be attracted to younger people all my life.This relationship just seems so right but moving very quickly.Please give me any experience you all may have had with this.
Love struck

navygirl's photo
Sun 10/27/13 09:10 AM
I don't think an 11 year age difference is too bad as its really only a decade and a bit between you and I am sure you both are matured age wise. Where it would be a concern if the gap was 20 years or more; then I would wonder what the guy's motive was. I haven't really dated anyone more or less than 10 years of my age so not much I can share. I say if it feels right; then just take it day by day but be cautious if it is moving too fast. Good luck with it.

TxsGal3333's photo
Sun 10/27/13 09:21 AM
11 years is not that big of a deal. Last one I dated was 12 years younger and actually the age was never a issue... Just go for it it may be the best thing you ever did...bigsmile

lilott's photo
Sun 10/27/13 10:10 AM
My parents were 11 years apart.

wolftiger's photo
Sun 10/27/13 11:07 AM
Edited by wolftiger on Sun 10/27/13 11:09 AM
i never ever think and will think age matter where there is love and a true one that ppl learn to keep live as love. go for love dear.

no photo
Sun 10/27/13 11:49 AM
Depends on the two people involved, sometimes maturity is an issue, sometimes ambition is an issue, it just depends. If you're both on the same page in regards to what you value and want in life, maybe it'll work out for you. Good luck however it goes.

lovetravelwithu's photo
Mon 10/28/13 05:11 AM
Thanks for posting. I really do appreciate it. Right now the difference doesn't seem that great right now but in 10 years it will seem greater.

oldhippie1952's photo
Mon 10/28/13 05:12 AM
It is whatever you are most comfortable with, you're the one who has to live it.

no photo
Mon 10/28/13 05:26 AM

Thanks for posting. I really do appreciate it. Right now the difference doesn't seem that great right now but in 10 years it will seem greater.


It 10 years, you might not care. Enjoy it while you can, life is too short to worry.flowerforyou

TawtStrat's photo
Mon 10/28/13 05:35 AM
Well, I've been with older and younger women. My last girlfriend was twenty one years younger than me and we got on great but I'm not the controlling type and it didn't bother me too much that she spent a lot of time hanging about with her friends instead of with me.

Usually I won't date women that are older than fifty and that's just a personal thing for me because I find younger women more fun and older women tend to have a lot of baggage and can be "I don't need a man" types. My ex is in her fifties now though and she's still fun to be around. I know this other lady that's in her fifties and although she's a bit on the skinny side for my taste, I've always found her very attractive and she's a classy lady. Unfortunately her husband left her a few years ago and although they are seperated, she still seems to be hung up on him. I mean, I've been out with her just as friends but when she told me that she had enjoyed the day we spent together and I asked her if she would like to go out for a meal sometime she just made an excuse about being too busy with family stuff.

sybariticguy's photo
Mon 10/28/13 07:13 AM
Edited by sybariticguy on Mon 10/28/13 07:13 AM

Thanks for posting. I really do appreciate it. Right now the difference doesn't seem that great right now but in 10 years it will seem greater.
its futile to concern yourself with what might happen in ten years as there are no guarantees in life much less love so enjoy the quality of your relationship and if that is right then make the most as time is precious and at your age you should know this...

no photo
Mon 10/28/13 09:30 AM
Im 26 and i really love dating older women so i think there are no limits for age :wink:

navygirl's photo
Mon 10/28/13 09:51 AM

Thanks for posting. I really do appreciate it. Right now the difference doesn't seem that great right now but in 10 years it will seem greater.


I think the age difference is minor. You are both very close in age, and closer in maturity as compared to say a 20 year difference where you would be two decades apart. With the small age gap; you mature together rather than having a younger person trying to play catch up. I say go for it and take it day by day.

no photo
Mon 10/28/13 10:01 AM
friend shift me

jacktrades's photo
Mon 10/28/13 10:01 AM
Hey if your happy then why change it.If he's in his late 40's then hey he all grown up and he knows what he's looking for sounds like its you.Take it and find peace every relationship has questions, be happy and God bless!

navygirl's photo
Mon 10/28/13 10:20 AM

Hey if your happy then why change it.If he's in his late 40's then hey he all grown up and he knows what he's looking for sounds like its you.Take it and find peace every relationship has questions, be happy and God bless!


Actually, he is 59 and she is 48. Just to clarify. :smile:

Duttoneer's photo
Mon 10/28/13 12:47 PM
I believe age difference does not matter, enjoying one anothers company is what it's all about, my best wishes to you both.

PacificStar48's photo
Mon 10/28/13 01:14 PM
I have mixed feelings about this.

My Dad remarried a very nice lady that was as much older as you are from your partner.

In the early years she and he were very compatible. And I know he loved her greatly. In the beginning it was no big deal.

But while he was still middle age and would have given his eye teeth to continue the healthy an active life including a "private life" she pretty much became his room mate leaving him a big hole in his life that he respectfully endured.

And as she aged she developed major health issues that meant years of caregiving that he willingly gave precluding him meeting anyone who might have actually enjoyed the retirement he worked 60 years between his two careers to earn.

Then while he was ageing he was alone and I believe incredibly lonely. I will always believe that is the biggest reason his health declined because he was lost without his mate.

We can pretend that seniors can date and find new companions but the reality is it rarely happens and when one mate is significantly younger they usually end up alone and more or less forgotten. Even if they are lucky enough to live with attentive families it is still very tough. Especially since too often the circle of friends becomes the age of the oldest spouse and they also die off.


navygirl's photo
Mon 10/28/13 02:03 PM

I have mixed feelings about this.

My Dad remarried a very nice lady that was as much older as you are from your partner.

In the early years she and he were very compatible. And I know he loved her greatly. In the beginning it was no big deal.

But while he was still middle age and would have given his eye teeth to continue the healthy an active life including a "private life" she pretty much became his room mate leaving him a big hole in his life that he respectfully endured.

And as she aged she developed major health issues that meant years of caregiving that he willingly gave precluding him meeting anyone who might have actually enjoyed the retirement he worked 60 years between his two careers to earn.

Then while he was ageing he was alone and I believe incredibly lonely. I will always believe that is the biggest reason his health declined because he was lost without his mate.

We can pretend that seniors can date and find new companions but the reality is it rarely happens and when one mate is significantly younger they usually end up alone and more or less forgotten. Even if they are lucky enough to live with attentive families it is still very tough. Especially since too often the circle of friends becomes the age of the oldest spouse and they also die off.



That is a good point. I think of these things myself which is why I never dated someone considerably younger than myself. Everyone states that as long as you love each other; then everything will be fine but once the "honeymoon stage" wears off; you will find that love isn't enough to bridge the generation gap. Health, interests, family, and especially the circle of friends can make or break the relationship. I think age really does matter when you actually look at the whole picture. People are caught up in emotions rather than looking at this in a logical perspective.

no photo
Mon 10/28/13 02:07 PM
True, about them possibly ending up alone, but I prefer to focus on the happiness you could have had before...nothing lasts forever, nothing is guaranteed, and you never know when your time is up. The younger person could die first, or just end the relationship. My uncle was younger than his wife and he dropped dead of a heart attack last year, we never even knew he was sick. So now she's the one left all alone...

All this "what if" stuff is stuff, if both parties agree to it, and you're both legal, what is the problem? Seize the day and all that ****.

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