Another thread on here got me to thinking about expectations. I am thinking beyond simply: What do you "expect" from a partner?

Well, what do you expect?

But also how do you think expectations change as the relationship changes?

I think they do change and that they should start out very small until we know each other well enough to communicate about what our expectations are & try to make sure we keep them "fair"


is it possible to have a relationship with "no expectations?"

I don't think it can happen since we all have some kind of expectations when entering a relationship.

To lower those expectations leads one to settling...

But then one must view what they expect, to see if those expectations are beyond our reach...

My list is pretty simple. . .honesty, trust, and respect. . . .b good kisses would be nice too. .bigsmile:

In a new relationship this^^^if by kisses Penny means chemistry In the beginning, the basics are all I really expect...But Sweet, you are right, as the relationship changes, expectations must also change...

Is it possible to have a relationship with no expectations?...That would be indifference, so no, not for me anyway...

thank you. I agree that expectations tend to evolve over time from little things in the beginning to "calling when we say we will" (both male and female)....to hey you forgot to pick the dry cleaning...to ultimately larger expectations such as fidelity.

I like what klc saaid about kindness & chemistry initially. I'd say that is pretty much how I view the initial stages also.

I admit it used to rankle me if a man had "expectations" but I do understand that now as a form of caring. I still think communication is necessary. I don't think we are "obligated" to expectations in a relationship with a man that we have not agreed to.

such as he may "expect" to make unilateral financial decisions or unilateral decisions about how free time is spent (as assumptions). I wouldn't go for that (as they impact my income and free time)

or

he may "expect" us to remain faithful at a certain point....as long as that has been a verbal understanding, I am fine with it and actually prefer it.

I did not think about settling....but I think what txsgal said is also true.

thanks Penny

I agree and might be buping up "good kisser" to the top of my list....that way even if it doesn't last something good is salvaged

i expect to wake up and see boobies





that is all

As far as I'm concerned it isn't a "relationship" without the physical intimacy. You seem to just be asking what I expect from a friend.

I am new to this, but have been reading through all the posts and would like to add my opinion.
I notice that women speak to emotional connections, while men are speaking to purely physical
Not to say that physical isn't a very important part of any good, lasting and rewarding relationship but.....
I think it might help men to understand that women think emotionally, the more they trust and feel that they matter as a person, the more they will want to enter into the physical part of a relationship with you.

Again...just my opinion

well we know your easy jt


lol

once again assumptions. Expectations can be part of any relationship. think more deeply perhaps. what would your expectations of physical intimacy be? are you certain that those are the only expectations you have?

an intimate partner is not also a friend? how horrid

at the beginning i just expect compatibility to a level we
can see potential. as the relationships grows i would expect
balance, where we both are happy and enjoy doing those
things that make us just intoxicated with each other, for each other.
i have always found that someone you truly want to be with, and
vice versa, just naturally makes your world go round. any
thing else would just not be what i am looking for.

i'm easy to please

thank you for adding your thoughts. clearly men have nonsexual expectations in a relationship. we have all had "why isn't dinner ready?" "what did u do with the remote control?"....the two sweethearts on here are simply thinking with their lower brains this morning...lol (in MY opinion)

it must be those testosterone cycles....

we love them anyway

do you think then, that these questions about expectations of each other are resolved almost seamlessly if the relationship is righteous? I tend to think that is probably true and why it is important to move slowly while , as u said, continuing to do those things that createhave created the physical and emotional strength that brought the 2 2gether

that's what they all say .......... at first

well i am