"Don't say never."

Is this old proverb proven false through time and circumstance? Does life move mechanically or by chance? What do you think of when you hear someone say "never"?

I say it all the time to clients who have given up on themselves; to co-workers and friends who think they face problems with not solutions. I always say never in terms of relationships though- here I rarely see people change

I firmly believe it is "never" a good idea to enter into a relationship imagining that the person will be any different/better than what you already know of them.

I also would "never" have a close relationship with a smoker.

I don't know what the word "never" has to do with life being chance, though.

when I hear someone say never I think 2 things. Either they feel very strongly about the subject and/or they are a little close minded. It depends on the context.

Sometimes it is very reasonable like saying you would never commit a violent crime for example. that 's not close minded really, we feel strongly about things like that.

But when saying never it should not be used judgmentally IMO - for example - a lot of people who would "never" commit a violent act have done so when pushed into a corner vis a vie a life threatening attack....

Well I guess when I hear it, normally its those two things. Some people use the word "never" out of fear sometimes. People who are scared of life I see use it in whatever they are saying and it gets overlooked and at times confused with the other meaning; feels strongly. But it really depends on what they are saying. Morality statements (killing, physically hurting, shaming etc.), feels strongly, trivial relationship promises OR pure fear of what something could mean to them, ex: "I will never meet that person."

No! Life moves by choices we make. Be careful to say "never" until you cross that bridge, so to speak, because you just might end up doing what you said you would "never" do, sometimes.

First you said "violent crime". Then you said "violent act".

A violent act isn't necessarily a crime.

good to see you! when used in fear it's a defense mechanism. I will "never" meet that person is sad - because why? why close off a possibility of friendship (given there is nothing weird or creepy) - or if it is because it is not possible - well that is also sad

never is a sad word sometimes

it is a hard promise to keep

I will never leave you

how many have heard THAT one before?????????

I don't know....I feel like this is what goes on in the world nowadays and it gets ignored a lot. People say never like its a verbal tick. I used to say it when I was younger because I heard people say the word and I liked how it sounded, as funny as that sounds. Sounded powerful to me. Like a command. Now I just think of it as something people say now to avoid life. Used in lying as well. Could be wrong but its what I gather from the people I've come across.

You mean kinda how people use the phrase I love you?

maybe

both are true at the time but leave us wondering - how true? and for how long?

so the sad element as well as the power and control element that mariah mentioned

it's an interesting word. an anomaly, an impossibilty

the longer i live the more apparent it becomes that most do not think before they speak - some "never" do ( )

I prefer the James Bond proverb: Never Say Never Again

In my limited time cruising around the planet I have learned that life is nothing more than perception. What we believe is the single most important aspect to defining our reality. That being said it is so crucial that we don't allow negativity in. It's the same thing as designing a back-up plan before working on your dream. All it does is quite literally set yourself up for failure. Words like "never" are the worst offenders you can ever have in your lexicon because they don't just imply a chance for failure (bad enough in it's own right) but the make it the unavoidable resolution. Not to mention life's most beautiful moments tend to surprise, by completely closing yourself off to a possibility you might miss the greatest ride you could ever have.

Oh and a side note, words like "always", "forever", and "never" do get thrown around a lot these days, but coming from the clinical psych side they are used predominately by people being casually dishonest as a means to add more "credit" or believability to what they are saying. Honest people know that all they can offer for sure is now and tend not to promise what they can't guarantee. That alone should be reason enough to avoid throwing them around yourself. :)

typically I think "really?" and respond "don't say NEVER" only because things change in life, oftentimes unexpectedly, so restricting oneself to NEVER change, move, choose etc creates limited boundaries for oneself..

that said.. the word NEVER seems to have lost much of it's meaning in today's vocabulary and is tossed around carelessly with nary a thought.. it seems people forget that in reality.. NEVER is a VERY long time

my experience is stuff can happen that you havent thought of

so 'never' is as risky a term as 'always'


in my opinion


there are lots of things I just cant see myself doing, but my mind cant imagine ALL possibilities or situations so that means there may be SOME situation in which I just might do those things


I feel that way about life in general,,,,


Im also a firm believer that the combination of speaking and repeating things/behavior makes them more solid and unchangable

so words like 'never' and 'cant' are two that I Try to not speak,,,at least about myself

unless in past tense,,, where 'never' can be used more definitievely

I really don't believe a lot of people have many words loaded into their lexicon. It'll be too daunting a task to, actually live broadly without worrying so much about what you think is going to happen. I feel really its just people acting out of their own self-restrained cages. Being wounded from life can constrict us beyond our control. Have you ever been hurt so hurt that you want to die? But you didn't want to kill yourself you just, didn't want to be here anymore? Not exist? You just wanna hide from life. I think its a mental illness in some ways to hold onto how much others hurt us. Saying "never" is a shield for our hearts when we really don't know what to say.

The three words you listed are almost as frequent as confessing "love" in everything you say and so soon too. I gotta say, as a broadly honest person myself, I run across people in life that believe lying is just the way the world should be, you know "forever?" It is just a simple fact that I should get used to because people are just scared of what really living their lives can mean to them.

There's this line from a book called Tuck Everlasting that says: "Most people will do everything they can to keep from dying to avoid living their lives."