A man walked into a cafe, went to the bar and ordered a beer. "Certainly, Sir , that'll be one cent."
"One Cent?" the man exclaimed.
He glanced at the menu and asked: "How much for a nice juicy steak and a bottle of wine?"
"A nickel," the barman replied.
"A nickel?" exclaimed the man. "Where's the guy who owns this place?"
The bartender replied: "Upstairs, with my wife."
The man asked: "What's he doing upstairs with your wife?"
The bartender replied: "The same thing I'm doing to his business down here."

How would you handle an affair?

Just Awesome!

I read that earlier this week in the forum

Then what about this one:

A mortician was working late one night. He examined the body of Mr. Schwartz, about to be cremated, and made a startling discovery. Schwartz had the largest private part he had ever seen!
"I'm sorry Mr. Schwartz," the mortician commented, "I can't allow you to be cremated with such an impressive private part. It must be saved for posterity."
So, he removed it, stuffed it into his briefcase, and took it home. "I have something to show you won't believe," he said to his wife, opening his briefcase.

"My God!" the wife exclaimed, "Schwartz is dead!"

Haha. Another funny one.
But shouldn't this be in the jokes section though?

Possible but often a relationship is a joke. Not that it is funny when you're in one but you should learn to laugh at life.

I agree. Most of the time, it is a joke.

If she wanted to come back to me and had admitted to me what she'd done I'd insist she prove to me that I am the person she really wants to be with. First I'd tell her to write down everything she did,why it was wrong, how it hurt me and what steps she'll take to be sure it never happens again.

I know, that sounds like a stupid idea and you're right, it is stupid. But, that's not the point. The point is that she has to do something difficult to prove herself to me. She must make me believe that I can trust her again. It won't be easy and it will take a very long time.

Also she cannot complain when I berate her for it. Yes, it makes her feel bad. But, she's a cheating, lying tramp. She should feel bad about what she did. She must suffer the punishment I deem necessary. If I forgive too easily, she'll lose respect for me and will surly do it again. Without pain there is no growth.

Or she can go. Women are not an endangered species.

He is gone. I have no need for that in my life. If I wanted to deal with cheating I would do it.

I told my late husband that I did not belive in Divorce but if he fooled around I did believe in Homicide.

The best way to handle an affair is to make sure her husband is out of town before you come over. If he's just at work, he might come home early.

Never have an affair with a buddy's wife.

For god's sake, never discuss it in an open forum.


I hope this helps.

I have to disagree with one of your points. Do everything you can to have sex with any friends woman, take lost of photos 9in case he doesn't believe you) and tell him everything ASAP so he knows what a lying, cheating tramp she really is.

He may hate you for it. But, it's for his own good and one day he'll see it.

You confront an affair , and then they deny it, and then you deny it, and then get paranoid and confront it again, then leave and watch them beg, but you go on because you are better than them and you deserve better than that, true story! And they deny it the rest of their life to save their pride and prejudice.

Do not start an affair!

SMART GIRL MY THOUGHTS EXACTLY :)

If she wants another.....

I walk away.

Its really simple.....

you turn....and put one foot in front of the other....

after you remove one from her......

arse..............

When I found out that my ex had cheated on me I was hurt, I was disappointed, for me the trust was gone in our marriage, I wondered how I had failed. I read books, I went to counselling (she would not). I forgave her but there was still a lack of trust. We divorced with her 2nd affair, and after 9 years of being divorced she told me she had a 3rd affair, on and off for 3 years. I don't hate her, I put up with her, because we have kids, and feel sorry for the husband she has now.

Thanks!

Ouch.

Seriously. I would walk unless there are children. Divorce hurts and affects them far more than it does the married people (I won't say adults). I was there. But once the children were mostly grown and gone, so was she. The marriage ended when I found out about her affair. No trust=no love=no relationship. I do not hate because she's not worth it (try that for an oxymoron)