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| Topic: Cliques, cults, or both? | |
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Due to a recent experience, I began researching cliques in an effort to better understand the dynamics of how and why they operate...In the past, I associated cliques with "young" people, specifically teenage girls....Big mistake!...Teens have graduated!...Much to their delight, these adult women (and men) have discovered the internet is a perfect place to exercise their control issues....Victims are often people they resent, envy, feel have stepped on thier toes, or just plain don't like for whatever reason... Unfortunately they use the "strength in numbers" game to hurt and alienate others in an effort to elevate low self esteem and disguise insecurities....Much like cults, cliques use intimidation, innuendo, and reverse psychology to sway consensus by casting themselves as the " virtuous" ones and their victims as the "bad" guys....The bigger the power trip, the more dangerous and damaging the game becomes...The most relevant connection between cliques and cults is that both are based on the same dynamic....One "central" person surrounds him or herself with synchophants who feed their ego...
I found two really good books on this subject...Both were written by Roselind Wiseman....The first, titled "Queenbees and Wannabees", is geared toward the younger set and was the basis for the movie "Mean Girls" ...Wiseman's second book, titled "Queenbees and Kingpins", speakes about the adult world of cliques..She formalized the structure of the clique as follows: Queen Bee Sidekick Banker Floater Torn Bystander Pleaser/Wannabe/Messenger Target. The book goes into a detailed accounting of how the clique forms and how people play each role..... Wiseman also gives good advice on how to "deal" if you are being targeted by a clique....Great read!! |
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Edited by
jemare
on
Fri 05/11/12 11:07 AM
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Leigh, how sad that I believe this to be true
 I think people have a basic core personality. It may change somewhat as they get older (and maybe life's experience can help to alter this), but those that are mean in spirit as teens, will probably be the same as adults. I think in cliques, those that like to lead in this manner, find new "followers" as life sends their old "followers" in other directions over time. Although I think that in a cult, it is more severe as the leaders can have a complete control over a group. You've given a good thought to ponder over
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Just don't drink the Kool Aid.
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I can not believe you are posting about clitz!
And not even in the "R" rated forum! 
Geez Leigh, Jerry really has had an effect on you sexually. Although I think its cool, im really not sure........ what....... OH CULTS!! Nevermind! |
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Leigh, how sad that I believe this to be true I think people have a basic core personality. It may change somewhat as they get older (and maybe life's experience can help to alter this), but those that are mean in spirit as teens, will probably be the same as adults. I think in cliques, those that like to lead in this manner, find new "followers" as life sends their old "followers" in other directions over time. Although I think that in a cult, it is more severe as the leaders can have a complete control over a group. You've given a good thought to ponder over
I understand your sadness all too well Jemare ..Even though I resisted the concept of adult cliques targeting other adults by brushing it off as belonging only to the young and immature, when it happened to me I had to accept that not only was I wrong, I was being naive....I agree with you, even though cults and cliques share a primary dynamic, a cult would fall into the extream range of a clique as described in Wiseman's book....
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I can not believe you are posting about clitz!
And not even in the "R" rated forum!
Geez Leigh, Jerry really has had an effect on you sexually. Although I think its cool, im really not sure........ what....... OH CULTS!! Nevermind! Am I supposed to laugh, cry, ignore, or fake confusion?..I'm picking number one..... 
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Just don't drink the Kool Aid. I hear you, but for some people that is easier said than done... 
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Due to a recent experience, I began researching cliques in an effort to better understand the dynamics of how and why they operate...In the past, I associated cliques with "young" people, specifically teenage girls....Big mistake!...Teens have graduated!...Much to their delight, these adult women (and men) have discovered the internet is a perfect place to exercise their control issues....Victims are often people they resent, envy, feel have stepped on thier toes, or just plain don't like for whatever reason... Unfortunately they use the "strength in numbers" game to hurt and alienate others in an effort to elevate low self esteem and disguise insecurities....Much like cults, cliques use intimidation, innuendo, and reverse psychology to sway consensus by casting themselves as the " virtuous" ones and their victims as the "bad" guys....The bigger the power trip, the more dangerous and damaging the game becomes...The most relevant connection between cliques and cults is that both are based on the same dynamic....One "central" person surrounds him or herself with synchophants who feed their ego... I found two really good books on this subject...Both were written by Roselind Wiseman....The first, titled "Queenbees and Wannabees", is geared toward the younger set and was the basis for the movie "Mean Girls" ...Wiseman's second book, titled "Queenbees and Kingpins", speakes about the adult world of cliques..She formalized the structure of the clique as follows: Queen Bee Sidekick Banker Floater Torn Bystander Pleaser/Wannabe/Messenger Target. The book goes into a detailed accounting of how the clique forms and how people play each role..... Wiseman also gives good advice on how to "deal" if you are being targeted by a clique....Great read!! You astound me my friend. You absolutely get my "impressive award of the year". Honest to goodness, you don't know this about me till now, but socially I'm actually quite shy with people unless it's business, but I would love to hang out with you and yours just to be around your Vibe, knowledge and wit. |
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Edited by
luv2roknroll
on
Fri 05/11/12 11:44 AM
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I can not believe you are posting about clitz!
And not even in the "R" rated forum!
Geez Leigh, Jerry really has had an effect on you sexually. Although I think its cool, im really not sure........ what....... OH CULTS!! Nevermind! Am I supposed to laugh, cry, ignore, or fake confusion?..I'm picking number one.....
here..........   
*Kitten runs before Vicky smacks her* |
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I can not believe you are posting about clitz!
And not even in the "R" rated forum!
Geez Leigh, Jerry really has had an effect on you sexually. Although I think its cool, im really not sure........ what....... OH CULTS!! Nevermind! Am I supposed to laugh, cry, ignore, or fake confusion?..I'm picking number one.....
here..........
*Kitten runs before Vicky smacks her* 
Thanks for this (((Kitten)))...I so needed a good belly laugh today!....AND, if this doesn't bring my guy back to the forums, nothing will...I miss the fun we used to have....Come on Jerry, SAY SOMETHING!!!!
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Due to a recent experience, I began researching cliques in an effort to better understand the dynamics of how and why they operate...In the past, I associated cliques with "young" people, specifically teenage girls....Big mistake!...Teens have graduated!...Much to their delight, these adult women (and men) have discovered the internet is a perfect place to exercise their control issues....Victims are often people they resent, envy, feel have stepped on thier toes, or just plain don't like for whatever reason... Unfortunately they use the "strength in numbers" game to hurt and alienate others in an effort to elevate low self esteem and disguise insecurities....Much like cults, cliques use intimidation, innuendo, and reverse psychology to sway consensus by casting themselves as the " virtuous" ones and their victims as the "bad" guys....The bigger the power trip, the more dangerous and damaging the game becomes...The most relevant connection between cliques and cults is that both are based on the same dynamic....One "central" person surrounds him or herself with synchophants who feed their ego... I found two really good books on this subject...Both were written by Roselind Wiseman....The first, titled "Queenbees and Wannabees", is geared toward the younger set and was the basis for the movie "Mean Girls" ...Wiseman's second book, titled "Queenbees and Kingpins", speakes about the adult world of cliques..She formalized the structure of the clique as follows: Queen Bee Sidekick Banker Floater Torn Bystander Pleaser/Wannabe/Messenger Target. The book goes into a detailed accounting of how the clique forms and how people play each role..... Wiseman also gives good advice on how to "deal" if you are being targeted by a clique....Great read!! You astound me my friend. You absolutely get my "impressive award of the year". Honest to goodness, you don't know this about me till now, but socially I'm actually quite shy with people unless it's business, but I would love to hang out with you and yours just to be around your Vibe, knowledge and wit. I (we) feel the same about you Michael  ...Are they still running Friday night wedding specials out there??
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A very very strange group of people!
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>>>>> runs to the bathroom because those pics were so funny, she almost peed herself. Oh yea... Leigh tell your Man-O that he wears a dress well. Not many men can get away with that
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Edited by
luv2roknroll
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Fri 05/11/12 11:52 AM
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Thanks for this (((Kitten)))...I so needed a good belly laugh today!....AND, if this doesn't bring my guy back to the forums, nothing will...I miss the fun we used to have....Come on Jerry, SAY SOMETHING!!!!
I thought I was in trouble! 
I couldnt resist! 
We now return you to your regularly scheduled thread. |
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Due to a recent experience, I began researching cliques in an effort to better understand the dynamics of how and why they operate...In the past, I associated cliques with "young" people, specifically teenage girls....Big mistake!...Teens have graduated!...Much to their delight, these adult women (and men) have discovered the internet is a perfect place to exercise their control issues....Victims are often people they resent, envy, feel have stepped on thier toes, or just plain don't like for whatever reason... Unfortunately they use the "strength in numbers" game to hurt and alienate others in an effort to elevate low self esteem and disguise insecurities....Much like cults, cliques use intimidation, innuendo, and reverse psychology to sway consensus by casting themselves as the " virtuous" ones and their victims as the "bad" guys....The bigger the power trip, the more dangerous and damaging the game becomes...The most relevant connection between cliques and cults is that both are based on the same dynamic....One "central" person surrounds him or herself with synchophants who feed their ego... I found two really good books on this subject...Both were written by Roselind Wiseman....The first, titled "Queenbees and Wannabees", is geared toward the younger set and was the basis for the movie "Mean Girls" ...Wiseman's second book, titled "Queenbees and Kingpins", speakes about the adult world of cliques..She formalized the structure of the clique as follows: Queen Bee Sidekick Banker Floater Torn Bystander Pleaser/Wannabe/Messenger Target. The book goes into a detailed accounting of how the clique forms and how people play each role..... Wiseman also gives good advice on how to "deal" if you are being targeted by a clique....Great read!! You astound me my friend. You absolutely get my "impressive award of the year". Honest to goodness, you don't know this about me till now, but socially I'm actually quite shy with people unless it's business, but I would love to hang out with you and yours just to be around your Vibe, knowledge and wit. I (we) feel the same about you Michael ...Are they still running Friday night wedding specials out there??
Why, are the 3 of us getting married? he's so cute and cuddly |
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Thanks for this (((Kitten)))...I so needed a good belly laugh today!....AND, if this doesn't bring my guy back to the forums, nothing will...I miss the fun we used to have....Come on Jerry, SAY SOMETHING!!!!
I thought I was in trouble!
I couldnt resist!
We now return you to your regularly scheduled thread. Did you say you were regular? |
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>>>>> runs to the bathroom because those pics were so funny, she almost peed herself. Oh yea... Leigh tell your Man-O that he wears a dress well. Not many men can get away with that
He's been practicing the art for many years now. |
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Due to a recent experience, I began researching cliques in an effort to better understand the dynamics of how and why they operate...In the past, I associated cliques with "young" people, specifically teenage girls....Big mistake!...Teens have graduated!...Much to their delight, these adult women (and men) have discovered the internet is a perfect place to exercise their control issues....Victims are often people they resent, envy, feel have stepped on thier toes, or just plain don't like for whatever reason... Unfortunately they use the "strength in numbers" game to hurt and alienate others in an effort to elevate low self esteem and disguise insecurities....Much like cults, cliques use intimidation, innuendo, and reverse psychology to sway consensus by casting themselves as the " virtuous" ones and their victims as the "bad" guys....The bigger the power trip, the more dangerous and damaging the game becomes...The most relevant connection between cliques and cults is that both are based on the same dynamic....One "central" person surrounds him or herself with synchophants who feed their ego... I found two really good books on this subject...Both were written by Roselind Wiseman....The first, titled "Queenbees and Wannabees", is geared toward the younger set and was the basis for the movie "Mean Girls" ...Wiseman's second book, titled "Queenbees and Kingpins", speakes about the adult world of cliques..She formalized the structure of the clique as follows: Queen Bee Sidekick Banker Floater Torn Bystander Pleaser/Wannabe/Messenger Target. The book goes into a detailed accounting of how the clique forms and how people play each role..... Wiseman also gives good advice on how to "deal" if you are being targeted by a clique....Great read!! You astound me my friend. You absolutely get my "impressive award of the year". Honest to goodness, you don't know this about me till now, but socially I'm actually quite shy with people unless it's business, but I would love to hang out with you and yours just to be around your Vibe, knowledge and wit. I (we) feel the same about you Michael ...Are they still running Friday night wedding specials out there??
Why, are the 3 of us getting married? he's so cute and cuddly What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, right Michael? 
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>>>>> runs to the bathroom because those pics were so funny, she almost peed herself. Oh yea... Leigh tell your Man-O that he wears a dress well. Not many men can get away with that
He's been practicing the art for many years now. You got that right MG...We've been fighting over who gets to wear the pink chiffon first for a whole week now 
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Due to a recent experience, I began researching cliques in an effort to better understand the dynamics of how and why they operate...In the past, I associated cliques with "young" people, specifically teenage girls....Big mistake!...Teens have graduated!...Much to their delight, these adult women (and men) have discovered the internet is a perfect place to exercise their control issues....Victims are often people they resent, envy, feel have stepped on thier toes, or just plain don't like for whatever reason... Unfortunately they use the "strength in numbers" game to hurt and alienate others in an effort to elevate low self esteem and disguise insecurities....Much like cults, cliques use intimidation, innuendo, and reverse psychology to sway consensus by casting themselves as the " virtuous" ones and their victims as the "bad" guys....The bigger the power trip, the more dangerous and damaging the game becomes...The most relevant connection between cliques and cults is that both are based on the same dynamic....One "central" person surrounds him or herself with synchophants who feed their ego... I found two really good books on this subject...Both were written by Roselind Wiseman....The first, titled "Queenbees and Wannabees", is geared toward the younger set and was the basis for the movie "Mean Girls" ...Wiseman's second book, titled "Queenbees and Kingpins", speakes about the adult world of cliques..She formalized the structure of the clique as follows: Queen Bee Sidekick Banker Floater Torn Bystander Pleaser/Wannabe/Messenger Target. The book goes into a detailed accounting of how the clique forms and how people play each role..... Wiseman also gives good advice on how to "deal" if you are being targeted by a clique....Great read!! You astound me my friend. You absolutely get my "impressive award of the year". Honest to goodness, you don't know this about me till now, but socially I'm actually quite shy with people unless it's business, but I would love to hang out with you and yours just to be around your Vibe, knowledge and wit. I (we) feel the same about you Michael ...Are they still running Friday night wedding specials out there??
Why, are the 3 of us getting married? he's so cute and cuddly What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, right Michael?
He'll make me a lovely bride! |
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