When i hear the word nice, i think boring, needy, unimaginative and plain. Am i the only one not looking 4 nice?

probably not the only one,,,

but IM sure many of us admire nice and wouldnt mind it being in there somewhere

however , if 'nice' is the only adjective that comes to mind,, it will probably become boring,,, as will any other adjective that stands alone to describe someone,,,

Hi Dodo David. I found this article taken from Psychology Today in your interest which you might find of interest.

(http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-love-wisdom/201201/is-being-nice-virtue)

This is what a Psychologist has to say about the definition of nice:

I quoted the article:

"Is Being Nice a Virtue?Should we think about all that "being nice" means?
Published on January 13, 2012 by Jennifer Baker, Ph.D. in For the Love of Wisdom

Credit: Diego Fernández
Is there a moral instruction we hear more often than "be nice"?

I'm fairly sure people actually take this instruction to heart, as I, too, just feel terrible if I haven't "been nice."

And if we take it to heart, it might explain why a young women remained next to a man who was clearly trying to harm her - an agitated man who was asking her to "go get a donut or something" in an airport at 3am, his voice getting louder and louder, completely insistent. She was being so nice back, that at first I assumed they knew each other. Only when he walked away did she express terror.

But there may be less dramatic reasons why "being nice" is an unhelpful guide to "being good" in the traditional sense virtue ethics recommends.

And I think they relate to one major difference between the traditional approaches to virtue (that of Plato, Aristotle, the Stoics, Epicureans and their modern day fellow travelers) and more recent ones (including very old ones like, even, Hume's.) More recent accounts of virtue may take our common sense accounts of "moral qualities" (niceness a prime example) and fit these into an explanation of the role virtue plays in morality. We widely agree that "niceness" is a good quality, so it would be included in one of these "more modern" accounts.

The older, original versions of virtue ethics are not as willing to take common sense accounts of good qualities at face value. Plato, who we can assume was an opponent of Socrates's execution, made this very clear: societies cannot be trusted to determine right and wrong. We can't just accept what is conventional, or widely accepted, as right.

And Aristotle presents common sense accounts of virtue in work on topics like 'how to give a speech' (his Rhetoric), but these don't mesh with the proposals he makes as he sets out his account of ethics. He has to coin new terms for virtues that haven't yet been recognized, he has to point out that there are right ways of being courageous, that we cannot just trust what we think we can see.

Each potential virtue has to be put to a test: how does it get us to function intellectually? Emotionally? Dispositionally?

The traditional accounts of virtue won't trust that just because we all tend to think "niceness" is a good quality, it should count as virtue.

So how would "niceness" fare? Could it be a virtue? If we ran it through the considerations of traditional virtue ethics, we'd be answering these types of questions.

Intellectually, how does "be nice" function? Does it help us to clarify what our role is? Does it help us to understand ourselves and good behavior better? Does it contribute to an appreciation of why very good acts are good?

Emotionally, how does being "nice" feel? Does it work out long term? Do you feel regret over "being nice?"

What does "being nice" get us to do? Are these the right things to do, in all cases?

I have my doubts about "niceness" when it comes to each of these questions. And I say this as a person who is still willing to admit "you are just not nice" is about the most thorough send-off you can give someone. The problem is that the concept of niceness just isn't disambiguated. It can refer to something crucial to our humanity, but at the same time it can suggest being passive and compliant.

A recent tweet by author Alain de Botton had got me thinking. Not about what he mentions- fear of failure, per se, but about this issue of "niceness" and virtue itself.

Half the fear of failure is of the judgement of false friends we feel compelled to impress but don't even like. @alaindebotton



What a distraction "the judgement of false friends" is! Boy, did that resonate. De Botton's tweet is what reminded me of the young woman being so kind, smiling, responsive, to a stranger trying to get her away from the rest of us in an empty airport.

She was being very nice! Worried, perhaps about the "judgement" of this very "false friend."

I remember how she was shaking as the rest of us finally figured out what was going on and alerted the airline personnel.

I will urge my children to never be that nice. To be virtuous, sure. But never that nice. For goodness's sake."

I think of myself as more of a good guy.

And I'm not boring, unless you don't like going places and doing "things."

I'm sorry....But....
People in general are Not nice......
we are selfishly motavated,
drivin by our own needs and wants,
with little regard for......others.
Yes, some of us have compassion, consideration, and genuine concern.
But that don't make us.......Nice.
We are human, we all got chit hidden in our closets or under our beds. We all got some baggage.
One day we treat someone well.....the next we treat'em bad.
It is what it is.
It is the honed edge we are drawn too....
If life hasn't sharpened our edges with the rough surfaces....we are.......Boring.
I, for one.....
Refuse to be.............
Nice!!!!!!!

Im Bad, But have a good side.

I really like wholesome womans post.

One person's idea of "nice" could be another's idea of nasty...it all a matter of perception.

Yup, some of the nicest people I know have had reputations for being a**holes or b*tches. I've found them to be far from it.

And it goes the other way too. An example is i took my very strong willed daughter to a 'nice' authority figure i had asked 4 help. help in teaching her that it is important for her to respect me. The person ignored me, dug 4 abuse and traumatised us both.

I was horrified that this 'nice person' could think so low and the whole experience turned us both off religion. She wont go to church and i dont blame her. What bothered me the most is my daughter thinks christians r creepy now. As does the world!

Neither sex is purely nice. Though we try really hard, its all in our intentions meeting the action.

I think that "nice" guys are often shy and don't put themselves out there. So you may know that you're nice but because it doesn't get shown you get overlooked. Plus the "nice" that they are looking for comes with time, nice and trust go hand in hand. They need to know that it's not an act and that is earned with a history of niceness. So to me I think the nice thing isn't a good starting place it's more like something that comes later when you get to really know someone.

Damn it Krupa, you're a great guy! True talk right there in ya'll faces. When they nice, think twice. Hahahahahahaha! Buuuyaaah!

You also right honey! Thumbs up!

All I can say in respect to this topic is that I am a very bad nice guy and I think that's best for anyone. Egoistic me! Oops!

I would never claim to be a nice person. Sometimes I am and sometimes I am not. I am human and yes I have my bad days.

Where are those strippers I've been askin bout? Ehhh?

I've never considered myself "nice" I'm to plain-spoken for that. But I do consider myself a "good man". There is a difference. A nice guy usually comes off as a wimp. That I'm not. A good man is a man who does what he knows is right. Even if it goes against him. His word is his bond. He never breaks his word.

He is good to his family. He holds his wife/girlfriend in high regard. Nobody messes with her or his kids. If they do they answer to him. He does what's right for his family. He is the man of the house. And he loves and shows his love to everyone in it. What he says, he means and if he has to he will back it up. He takes no shyt off no one. He respects himself. He respects his family. He tells his kids what they are gonna do. Not the other way around. He and his wife/girlfriend lead together.

Every man I have ever seen refered to as a nice guy, That's usually a "nice" way of saying he is a wimp. Easy to lead around. Lets everyone run over him. No one respects him. Bland and boring.