Topic: Going "dutch", what are the rules? | |
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She Pays Now. Cause in a few yrs she's takin half or more of mine anyway. Hummm not many dates lately huhh? lmao Myself if I ask I'm prepared to pay and will in fact pay for my own if they ask..... Hehehe.......I thought it was.....funny!!!! but really......... If I ask..I expect to pay.....if she offers I'll tell her...next time!!! |
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I wouldn't mind paying as long as I don't have to wear those silly wooden shoes.
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Edited by
Cheer_up
on
Sun 04/15/12 08:47 AM
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I try to pay for all of it. If you are both paying..it ain't a date...it's just hanging out. Hanging out ain't gonna get you any closer to a real relationship where as a date may help. If you're worrying over whether a date is a date because of who is paying, the date probably isn't going that well. Hey now Krupa paid when we went to breakfast and the friendship is going great.... Sorry the way I see it who every ask the other to go should be prepared to pay...It may not happen that way the other may offer to pay their part if not then pay the bill and don't whine about it... |
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Rules???????????????????????????????????????????
WHY do there always have to be Rules?????????? If she wants to pay...she can pay!!! If she doesnt.....she dont..... Screw the Rules!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
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Rules??????????????????????????????????????????? WHY do there always have to be Rules?????????? If she wants to pay...she can pay!!! If she doesnt.....she dont..... Screw the Rules!!!!!!!!!!!!! Right. I don't do dutch, I just pay because her company is a pleasure. |
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This is something I sometimes wonder about.
Especially as the realities of dateing ,of even having a social life, for most of us mere nortals means doing it on a budget wheather it is time and or money. Or that sometimes a date is just a date and not a preamble to courting. I will be honest enough to say if I suggest that a date be Dutch it probably is a good clue that I am still checking them out or they are in the friend only zone and not likely to graduate to a level of intimatcy and co mingleing anything. While I so believe in being very honest with people I don't see a great need to explain if my interst in someone is meager or waining. Most people do not want to hear how they are failing in romance and trying to remake themself if the relationship is not a natural fit is an exercise in futility. I am a big believer in letting some relationships die gracefully and then you can move on as friends if you don't recite how they don't quite measure up in the personal interest area. There is someone for everyone but not everyone is for me or vice versa. Doesn't make either person wrong but if I am saying dutch treat after a long pouse it is probably a polite hint that the interest has cooled. Now if I have been dateing a person, which I tend to see as an equal number of invitations to share time together where who ever makes the invite pays and the guy gets huffy about me chipping in as an insult to his manhood or suggesting that going dutchh on something a little pricery is me being a gold digger then I am probably going to get the feeling that money is going to be a power play in the relationship and my interest is going to evaporate fast. If anything I am generous to a fault with my friends and family and I don't buy into the whole women are helpless parasites crapola. I have been paying my way in the world since I was a young teen so dateing never has been about supplimental economics. Every guy I have ever been in a relationship with has prospered because I am good with money and there isn't enough money to buy my love so it just does not come into the picture. As a mature person I am dortuneate that I have aquireded and hung onto the nasic necessities but I have also been through some catestrophic events in my life and I know how long it sometimes takes to recover from certain responsibilities. I am not foing to turn away anyone who must live modestly because they have taken some economic or "time" hits in the real world. To me a person who demonstrates being responsible about either impresses me a lot more than someone who tosses around a lot of social invitations like there never will be another rainey day. That I rarely entertain at my home, have worked in the hospitality industry and know the realities, and frequently like to linger over coffee/dinner at my more favored resturants where they happily accomodate that since I am a heavy tipper I don't need to date some guy who gets his shorts in a knot if I drop some cash on the table. |
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This is something I sometimes wonder about. Especially as the realities of dateing ,of even having a social life, for most of us mere nortals means doing it on a budget wheather it is time and or money. Or that sometimes a date is just a date and not a preamble to courting. I will be honest enough to say if I suggest that a date be Dutch it probably is a good clue that I am still checking them out or they are in the friend only zone and not likely to graduate to a level of intimatcy and co mingleing anything. While I so believe in being very honest with people I don't see a great need to explain if my interst in someone is meager or waining. Most people do not want to hear how they are failing in romance and trying to remake themself if the relationship is not a natural fit is an exercise in futility. I am a big believer in letting some relationships die gracefully and then you can move on as friends if you don't recite how they don't quite measure up in the personal interest area. There is someone for everyone but not everyone is for me or vice versa. Doesn't make either person wrong but if I am saying dutch treat after a long pouse it is probably a polite hint that the interest has cooled. Now if I have been dateing a person, which I tend to see as an equal number of invitations to share time together where who ever makes the invite pays and the guy gets huffy about me chipping in as an insult to his manhood or suggesting that going dutchh on something a little pricery is me being a gold digger then I am probably going to get the feeling that money is going to be a power play in the relationship and my interest is going to evaporate fast. If anything I am generous to a fault with my friends and family and I don't buy into the whole women are helpless parasites crapola. I have been paying my way in the world since I was a young teen so dateing never has been about supplimental economics. Every guy I have ever been in a relationship with has prospered because I am good with money and there isn't enough money to buy my love so it just does not come into the picture. As a mature person I am dortuneate that I have aquireded and hung onto the nasic necessities but I have also been through some catestrophic events in my life and I know how long it sometimes takes to recover from certain responsibilities. I am not foing to turn away anyone who must live modestly because they have taken some economic or "time" hits in the real world. To me a person who demonstrates being responsible about either impresses me a lot more than someone who tosses around a lot of social invitations like there never will be another rainey day. That I rarely entertain at my home, have worked in the hospitality industry and know the realities, and frequently like to linger over coffee/dinner at my more favored resturants where they happily accomodate that since I am a heavy tipper I don't need to date some guy who gets his shorts in a knot if I drop some cash on the table. No problem with that. Had a woman pay the entire meal and tip once on me, despite my protests (I didn't protest too long, she wanted to do it). |
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I'm new to the site but I've also had this question, in general, for years. I've also been out of the loop since a lot of my adulthood was spent in a relationship. Now I've been divorced for 3 years and I'm stepping out there again. The question: is it assumed the man pays for everything...as in, I contact someone, or they contact me for a coffee-shop visit. Should each person pay for their own coffee, or is it assumed the man simply allways pays for everything. I'm a male, but I don't pay my male friends bill when we get together as friends...but what are the rules for female friends? I'm on this site looking for a female friend with the "possibly" of a LTR. This may be a dumb question, I know, but I don't have any casual female friends to get input from. What do people think? It is always good to at least offer to pay and if she keeps insisting then let her pay her own, at least you tried. |
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Yes...I paid....and she still ain't showed me her boobs. I feel so used....
sigh...sniffle...snot bubble :) |
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Nope....No Dutch.......
the daym wooden shoes don't go with my.... Kilt!!!!! |
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I have tried to be more progressive thinking though....."equal rights"...."Feminism"....crap like that. I am trying to be supportive of the concept. So, if some broad wants to hump me like I owe her money....she should be the one to pay. If she wines me and dines me, THEN she can 69 me.
hehehehehehe |
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Yes...I paid....and she still ain't showed me her boobs. I feel so used.... sigh...sniffle...snot bubble :) Awww heck Krupa here now do ya feel better lmao .... |
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Nope....No Dutch....... the daym wooden shoes don't go with my.... Kilt!!!!! Sounds kinda punk fashionista. Give it a shot bro....SOMEONE has got to be the one to step up and start a fashion trend. |
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Yes...I paid....and she still ain't showed me her boobs. I feel so used.... sigh...sniffle...snot bubble :) Awww heck Krupa here now do ya feel better lmao .... I love you. :) |
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Nope....No Dutch....... the daym wooden shoes don't go with my.... Kilt!!!!! Sounds kinda punk fashionista. Give it a shot bro....SOMEONE has got to be the one to step up and start a fashion trend. |
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Don't be fooled Cheer....I am pretty sure, those ain't her actual boobs...(though I did manage to rub one out to them).
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