Community > General Discussion

Topic: A BETTER YOU
sweetestgirl11 Joined Fri 09/12/08 Posts: 30087	Sun 03/04/12 07:58 PM
After so many years of worrying about my ex and my sons, I am learning that it is OK to put myself first. My boys are men now and I feel I did a good job raising them but in the process I forgot to think about myself. It may sound strange to some but to anyone who has raised a family and always put their wants and needs first it takes time to rediscover the person you are. I'm getting there. you can put yourself first and still be there for them too - everything in time

jaded72 Joined Tue 12/06/11 Posts: 1456	Sun 03/04/12 08:32 PM
After so many years of worrying about my ex and my sons, I am learning that it is OK to put myself first. My boys are men now and I feel I did a good job raising them but in the process I forgot to think about myself. It may sound strange to some but to anyone who has raised a family and always put their wants and needs first it takes time to rediscover the person you are. I'm getting there. I'm in this process, too. Learning to reconnect with myself while being a wife and mother. It's been liberating to change my responses to situations; to change the energy. All the best to you.

PacificStar48 Joined Tue 10/02/07 Posts: 13764	Sun 03/04/12 09:12 PM
Glad to see this thread rotate back up. Sorry with only half the eye surgery done I am not going to read through every one elses posts tonight but I figure they will be interesting. What am I trying to do to improve myself? Probably trying to live one day at a time and not be too hard on myself when one seems to slip away from me and the "to-do" list doesn't become the "done-list". Think the last decade living around my dad has been a positive influence because he is a gentle soul for the most part. Never was one to like competeing but now more likely to avoid conflict tham let it suck me in. It is still sometimes a concious effort but I am begining to make it a habit. I think that would probably count as self improvement. Been thinking a lot about how much room I am making for someone in my life. Was kind of shocked when the anniversery of looseing my mate hit the two decade mark and I looked back over how the time had slipped away without shareing it with anyone all that significant. Kind of hit me I had stayed too busy, too distant, to crowded into my routine to even notice that I had not left any real space for someone to be in my life. Think I might need to expand my interests, warm up to being more social, make a little more effor to flirt and fluff my feathers. Making and effort to take better care of myself instead of every orphan that comes along. See guys I listen Downsizing to a smaller place I may still have to ditch some "lady" stuff to make it more hospitable to a S.O. but I think I have OD'ed on the whole "my way" concept. It was kind of nice after years of doing the Mommy thing but would be nice to see someone across the dinner table occassionally. Neck maybe even the breakfast table for the brave souls. lol Does that count as self improvement? Probably depends who you ask.

mssilverfox Joined Sat 12/08/07 Posts: 10529	Sun 03/04/12 10:02 PM Edited by mssilverfox on Sun 03/04/12 10:02 PM
After being a caregiver for my husband and then my mom (they passed away 7 months apart) and having to deal with people at a nursing home, I decided to keep as many negative people as possible out of my life...That was 5 yrs ago and I've done a pretty good job.. Learning to say NO sometimes and taking time for yourself also helps.. I had to go thru a mental breakdown at age 23 to learn that... I'm a survivor, having raised 2 familys, I don't feel quilty about taking time for myself...

oldhippie1952 Joined Mon 03/14/11 Posts: 22693	Sun 03/04/12 10:34 PM
After so many years of worrying about my ex and my sons, I am learning that it is OK to put myself first. My boys are men now and I feel I did a good job raising them but in the process I forgot to think about myself. It may sound strange to some but to anyone who has raised a family and always put their wants and needs first it takes time to rediscover the person you are. I'm getting there. I also put my kids priorities first. Now they are stabilized and it's my turn! I regret nothing I sacrificed.

winterblue56 Joined Sun 12/12/10 Posts: 2465	Mon 03/05/12 06:49 PM
I am trying to work on self esteem. I am the only one there for myself and my kids. I have to be strong for them. Working on self esteem is a hard one and most of us are working on it. Although from what I have seen here on Mingles; you are one incredible lady that should feel damn good about yourself. You are right,navy. Machug is really a very good person. Yes she is

krupa Joined Thu 07/03/08 Posts: 18651	Mon 03/05/12 06:58 PM
I just go by what my Dad taught me as a kid.... "Be the best man you can be today..tommorrow be a better man" I always try to be good today....tommorrow, I want to be better. It don't always work out but, at least I try.