Would you consider this a bigoted statement?

" I would be friends with (insert adjective here) people, but I prefer not to date or marry one"


I have found that I have strong preferences at this point in my life, in terms of education and hygiene, although I realize not everyone has had the same opportunities in life to learn hygiene or to obtain education. I am really just not interested in someone that doesnt 'speak my language', so to speak.

I also have a strong preference for independent type who have their own because I already am responsible for two children and just choose not to take responsibility (at this time) for another adult.

I have these preferences just because of what I think is comptible with me, not because of any negative feeling toward the groups mentioned.

Do you suppose this would still be a form of bigotry though? Hoping not,,,,,

I don't think your a bigot. It's all about personal preference.

Just my opinion.

why would that be bigoted? personal preference doesn't matter? i guess we should all do things we don't wanna do so we don't hurt someones feelings... thats the problem with PC, nobody can have an opinion about anything...

I dont think so.....a matter of preference isnt bigotted in my opinion

I think "bigoted" implies a sort of negative value judgment re: whatever group is in question. A preference is more along the lines of "I'm not interested in anyone who is _________" but doesn't say that those people are bad or worth less than others in any way.

There are lots of people here who fall into categories I wouldn't date, but I value them as good friends nonetheless.

Thats what I meant, thanx.

There are many people I wouldnt want to pass up on getting to know as friends, even though I wouldnt want to 'share' a life with them.

I do not think it is bigoted to prefer to date within your race or culture. It is a preference like any other. As long as we treat each other with equal respect and avoid stereotyping we can avoid racism. To me, racism includes a belief that a people is inferior, undeserving of equal treatment, or somehow "bad" people because of their race.

I think those with whom we are friends and who we date are personal choices - often based on several compatibility factors - if you do not have a lot of associates outside of your race, I do not think that is racist - it becomes racist if you treat a person negatively or unfairly because of their race.

You can treat others fairly but not necessarily be close personal friends or dating partners. I like to have a very diverse friendship base, myself, that does not have limits defined by race or culture. But I have associates who clearly prefer their own race for socializing....as long as that in no way impacts me negatively, I don;t care one way or the other.

maybe I'm wrong but this is how I interpret a difference between preferences and racism

Oh, IM the last person to have issue with race. I was speaking more along the lines of not dating smokers, or drinkers, or non christians, or things that relate to how others believe or carry themself (Race is out of anyones control).

And you make a good point about preferences, they arent absolutes usually. I say I dont prefer to date smokers or uneducated, rather than that I would NEVER date a smoker or an uneducated man


I think preferences just narrow down our choices, but life has a way of expanding them again and I certainly could fall in love with someone regardless of their education or smoking habit if I were around them enough to get to know them and do so...

i dont think there is anything wrong with that.... we all have our opinions on who we would or would not like to date or marry... anyone who says they dont is a liar...

Didn't read anything more....You are approaching this topic with bigotry in mind.....not my thing....peace.

why do u think that? I thought she wanted to avoid racist behavior.

Knowing what you want and knowing what you don't want can be important. In Ham Radio we discriminate the unwanted frequencies from the wanted frequencies. It is called fine tuning when it comes to radio. At one time there was just the digital form that Samuel Morse broke up with the carrier being broken up through modulation. He would modulate then demodulate. This technology evolved to become the modem which the computer uses to get Online. It evolved into frequency modulation or FM radio. It evolved into more than just a key but ANSI which makes you keyboard discriminate between the letter "A" and the letter "B". Before discrimination the signal would broadcast on all signals. This happens when one goes through grief and divorce without discrimination. The greater the discrimination the less the white noise. When there was just reception with carrier antennas didn't have to discriminate as much. Harmony was present on all frequencies but when the transmitter comes into play especially with when the transceiver transcended the transmitter the antenna had to be cut into different lengths so that the standing wave ration would be a one to one match. Otherwise, the finals in the radio would burn up and the radio would fail the smoke test. Even the antenna could melt when the wave mismatch was amplied at greater frequencies in the ultrasonic frequencies and greater voltage levels, i.e. Xray and microwaves ovens. Discrimination isn't always bad.

Think about it in terms of; would you want your daughter to marry a
(insert term here).

Why or why not.

Since my daughter is just as big as a control freak as me or her mother control is not that a big a deal for her. She is good at controlling herself.

It is showing your preferences. Also that you can make friends with anyone.

I'm the same way. Just because I want you as a friend does not mean you will be more then that. Regardless what others think it is what it is.

I'd have to agree with Lex here. It's a preference of mine, and I don't consider it bigoted. As long as one isn't nasty or derogatory about why they prefer it the way they do, then it shouldn't be a problem.

Damn, that is just what I was going to say.

Your intent and the statement itself are not bigoted. It is a clear and honest statement of preference; something everyone has.

However, that particular wording is treacherous because it is often only the lead in to more clearly prejudicial pronouncements.

I agree that referring to "interest" would improve the feel of the statement, rather than "wants" or what you will or won't do.

I guess the question here would have to be "why".

After you answer that then you could answer if it is bigoted.

Bigoted people are not so intentionally a lot of times. They were raised bigoted and don't know any better.

But if an answer to "why" implies that the person is less than you, bad, etc... then it is probably a prejudice making it bigoted.

Preferences are not the same. I don't date druggies because one: I don't fit in that lifestyle but they have the right to live how they want and they are not less than me because of it. Preference.

Bigoted: I don't date druggies because they are sorry no good pieces of shyte not worth my time.

Preference: Warm brown eyes just really flip my switch.

Bigoted: Brown eyes are better than blue.