It's probably not going to be very popular here, but is it frowned upon to use dating sites to look for "friends with benefits"?

Most people on here are looking for Mr/Mrs Right which is fair enough; whereas some say they're just looking for friends, although probably a fair proportion of those are doing that with a view to becoming friends with their Prince(ss) Charming.

Having recently come out of what could be termed a toxic relationship, I'm just looking for someone to chat with and possibly more, but without leading people on with expectations of it blooming into a big romance. I just want to be open and honest, but obviously I don't want to scare anyone away. And of course there may be people who are looking for "Mr Right" but don't mind spending time with "Mr Right Now".

So how do you react when you see a profile for someone of your preferred sex who's looking for (what Mingle terms) an "activity partner"? Do you judge them and if so, how? Should dating sites be purely for the pursuit of lifelong monogamous romance or not?

Discuss!

I know you disagree with it and that's completely fine. I also know that different things work for different people. If someone is just looking for sex, rather than a relationship, being honest about it is going to get them farther with it. Being dishonest about it may get what they want in the beginning, but it's going to cause all kinds of drama.

I think it's more disrespectful to lie about what you're looking for, whether it be sex, a relationship or whatever.

Well I have an activity partner now..me n firefly gonna build a ship! Hmm...gotta bring an Elephant and a Longhorn onboard though, even though we beat your a$$ 2 years ago

I think you're being realistic, which is quite refreshing. When it comes to romance and relationships, nothing can be labelled properly IMO cos people develop, their relationships are in constant flux and "Miss/Mr Right" can turn into nothings, whereas FWB can turn into something big and meaningful.
I'm totally new here, so I don't even know yet where to look what people said on their profile, I'm just focussing on their words for the time being. I can't even remember what I put on my own profile - after all, profiles are like pictures: momentary glimpses, not the full picture at all.

Dude...I'm an Aggie...you must saw off those horns before letting that bull on board

ah an Aggie..ok we are good then

I'm not sure how realistic it is to think that a FWB kind of thing is going to turn into something big and meaningful. It could happen, I'm sure, but I don't know that it happens a lot. I think that's what sweetestgirl was talking about... many women get into that kind of thing thinking more is going to come from it and it doesn't happen that way.

Oh, I agree, it doesn't happen very often. I merely meant that putting a label on something doesn't necessarily mean that the same label will still apply in a few weeks time. IMO it's realistic to not pay too much attention to the labels, but to approach people and let them approach with an open mind.

Oh, I agree, it doesn't happen very often. I merely meant that putting a label on something doesn't necessarily mean that the same label will still apply in a few weeks time. IMO it's realistic to not pay too much attention to the labels, but to approach people and let them approach with an open mind.

What I was trying to get at was listen to the person about what he or she is looking for. If they specifically state they're not looking for a relationship, it is not realistic to think they're going to change their mind about that. When people think they can change someone's mind, that's where the drama starts.

Aw really? :o And i thought FWB meant a friend that would pay my bills, or give me free money. Kidding. As much as you think it's wrong to want a FWB, there's no such thing as a perfect relationship anyway. It's funny how people build up this naive image in their minds (not everyone, just some) that somehow they'll have the perfectly planned wedding, or even dream up what their next partner may look like, but that isn't being real is it? Some like to fantasize, which is quite normal, but still, do they really expect their life will really turn out how they imagine it will? I see nothing wrong with you being honest. What will you lose from being honest? I get the feeling (i may be wrong here) that your fearing losing something if you do. At least you're being honest from the start. That's what matters. It's YOUR life :)

My idea of an activity partner is not the same as FWB. An activity partner is someone I can spend time with as a friend and its completey platonic. A FWB is nothing more than a waste of skin to me. I think if you want a FWB; just find yourself a prostitute as you clearly don't respect a person anyways.

It's probably not going to be very popular here, but is it frowned upon to use dating sites to look for "friends with benefits"?

when someone has activity partner on their profile i chuckle at it cause if they are from 18 to 50 years of age just lookin for an activity partner well i'm kinda like...yeah rrrrrriiiiight the activities will be leading to another activity