Well, her selling her plasma has landed her in the ER on Monday, because of dehydration----not being hydrated enough beforehand and her body chemistry being screwed up because of her period. She passed out in the bathroom of a Wendy's after she donated and was taken out in an ambulance.

But she is going to do it again in the morning... ....after they spend the night in a car with her two friends because none of the other three have a place to live.....yes, the new boyfriend and room mate was kicked out of his apartment yesterday!!!

she stubborn
you figure she would had learned her lesson
but nope
she too dang blind

Am just gonna say this without any regrets ......

she is 18years old you know the situation to which she going to be in ,
At 18 years ,she needs her parents - Guidance-
might think its love ,but its mere inexperience (infatuation )
sending wrong signals
to answer your question :No i don't think that relationship is
gonna go anywhere ...

i didnt grew up with my parents , and at 18 i wanted them so bad because,my life turn upside down
i blamed them some may say its selfish but frankly i don't care

She is your kid , sit her down tell her your mind ...you see what she cant ......
later she will thank you .

I'm not a big fan of tough love. I believe more in keeping the door open and communicating. Of course, that means not having to always agree. You can voice your opinion, but still be supportive.

So, if she's hungry give her a meal....but not every night. If she wants to take half of it for her boyfriend, that's her decision.

If she needs a place to stay, give her only a couple nights....that's it.

If she wants money for a wedding, tell her to plan it out herself, so she can see the cost. After she does, give her only what you can afford, but don't pay for more than half.

Etc.

Enough to let her know that you care, and are there for her, but don't let her boyfriend mooch off of you. If he complains to her about it, it gives her a reason to defend you rather than hate you.

That's the best I can think of.

In my country, this is a definite direction that does not need questioning. My friends from the Western culture do have hesitations with this family set up - parents being in charged of their kids up until the kids are not yet past their teenage years (and in some cases until the kids are kids at heart and unbound by experience).

Hope everything turns out fine for your daughter, eileena09

Yes, in your country family tends to mean more than it does here. I'm not saying parents here love there children any less, just that I have seen a much stronger family bond amongst your people.

It's one of the many things I admire about your country.

I have tried talking to her, she says she will think about what I say but after a few days she tells me that just because I have heard it happen to others doesn't mean it is going to happen to them.

Tonight when I asked her not to donate tomorrow, her reply was that she will do it because "he loves her and she will follow him anywhere." That "he puts her before anything, even himself....but he has her sleeping in a car with another couple and putting her health in danger. To me, that isn't love as kissable said, it is infatuation. Lynx, he will convince her that I am in the wrong for not taking care of both of them. He has that much influence over her right now.

I will always be here for her but not to support them, things are hard enough for us to make ends meet right now I can't afford to pay their expenses too. My brother is doing that with his son who is a hs dropout and doesn't have a job.....my brother is now fighting cancer and the money he could be using to spend on better treatment is going out on his son's rent and food.

So soory to hear that.Py prayers are with you all.Hope she does come to her sences.

Eileena, I don't like her situation either. I understand your worries. And yes, she is putting her health at risk. But if she isn't listening to you, what options do you have? She hasn't quite reached a point where you can do a legal intervention, like with a drug addict, has she? Maybe the health issue will reach that point tomorrow or the next day.

It sucks that she is doing this.

But, right now you need to have faith in your parenting. Meaning, you have to believe that she will snap out of it based on what you have already taught her.

Personally, I think this guy is manipulating her. Whether he realizes it or not, is a whole other story. Some people are like that. I don't think she really loves him - I think she has convinced herself that she does. If he really loved her, then he would be donating to gain money too. Who cares if it is blood, plasma, or even semen. What she is in love with is feeling loved, but that is a far cry from actual love. The only way to combat that is to show her what love really is, and all it means.

Then again, I don't know her or her boyfriend. I'm just trying to give you another perspective is all.

Sorry to hear about your situation. I can only imagine how you must feel. Hopefully after a little time passes, she will change her mind and they both take the time to concentrate on their education first and being financially stable, then moving on in the direction that they choose too.

Please Please Please, be careful I have been through this already.

Not with my daughter but myself.
My mum begged me not to marry my ex, she was worried for me and she made good points and i sat and listened, and said I would think about it, but I didnt see it, and I believed that the problems he had could be fixed or wherent his fault.
I stillmarried him, I lived though 15 years of abuse and supported him, but In all that time I never ever talked to my Mum about what was going on at home..
Not because I didnt love my Mum and I knew that she loved me and would do anything to help me.
But I didnt want my Mum to know and be disappointed with me, and I wasnt strong enough to leave on my own..

When I finally did leave, everyone reminded me of what they thought, which made me feel pretty bad, i was young , and immature.

I still cannot share my feeling with anyone , except annaconda, and havent been able to for years.

With my own children we talk about anything, if something is wrong they let me know and we talk, my eldest daughter has brought many problems to me and I can tell her what my opinion is but she knows that no matter what she decides I will never try and change her mind,
She also knows that aI will be there for her to pick her up when she needs me,

I dont know how you can do it, and I doubt that she will change her mind, but try and keep your trust and communication open.

And yep she has to know that she is responsible for her actions and that if they are married that you cannot look after them , not because you dont love her, but because you cannot.

I hope everything works out..

{{{{{Josie}}}}}

There is some good news to report.

I picked the kids up last night, and they spent the night at home.

I'm not too thrilled that her boyfriend spends as much time here as he does, but at least our daughter was inside last night.

She is quitting the plasma donation for awhile because after she did the other day, she felt really crappy and agreed with me that she should put it on hold for awhile.

Thank God for small miracles.

I hope this experience is her wake-up call.

I hope everything works out for your family soon.

No, she doesn't have a job right now. She was doing babysitting for a while but the family got into financial trouble and didn't need her anymore.

She will always have my love and support, and she knows that.

I get the "We will work through all our problems together....and at least we will be together while trying it!"

I have already gone over all of that with her when she told me they were engaged. I stayed calm and she said she would think about it and try to figure it out. After talking to him, she claimed they have it all figured out....but those plans have been falling apart.

The friends she claimed they would move in with broke up, and then they got kicked out of the apartment. The car she was saving for got sold to someone else.....etc...

OMG I remember when I was 18 and I was IN love with someone who didn't have a job or a car. My mother didn't like him and that made me like him even more!! I was warned to stay away from him and that made me want to be around him even more...you really have to be careful HOW you word things with your daughter because you might make her RUN right to him.
I am not a big believer in letting a boyfriend spend the night, but I am not a big believer in letting someone live on the streets either. YOU are in a very tight spot. I do know that IF I allowed him to stay in my house, they would never be allowed to sleep in the same room. I don't know this is a rough one.
I will keep you in my prayers!!
PS
I was IN love with that guy for about 2 years, ended up getting my heart broke and went through a lot of stuff over him. He was NO good for me BUT I had to learn that on MY own. I guess we all have to live our lives and learn from our mistakes!!!

Oh both Jon and I have made it very clear that they are not allowed to sleep in the same room. That has been stressed from the day she started asking if he could stay at the house. One time when he was caught in her bed, started a whole argument and that is when she told us they were engaged. I don't know if she thought we would jump up and down and say it was okay then, but we have both been very cautious with what we say so it doesn't push her into his arms faster.

I just hope she comes to her senses soon because she just dropped another bombshell on us...they want to move to either San Diego or Seattle..