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| Topic: Can relationships be that hard? | |
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As above, ive had a few,not that many as i try as hard as i can to make a go of my relationships when things are not as good as they could be. I got married two years ago at the age of 38 for the first time as i realy wanted to meet the right person before i gave that important commitment,as soon as we were married my wife changed i couldn't understand it. Im not stupid by any means but surely marriage isnt a key to unlocking a relationship,its should be a tool for locking it securly. Im a very decent man who seems to get walked over as i am always a peacemaker and a forgiver. Just marriage seems to of shattered my life,im now in a pokey small flat on my own,not seeing my daughter,who i bought up from birth,thinking do i trust my choice in women????? Im very tall,ex army and can look after myself but i do despair as i have so much love and affection to give the right lady. xxxxxxxxxx
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communicate with your partner and dont give up on marriage. if you settle on marriage you have to accept your partner on what she was. thats why you had your marriage with her. you love her inside and out. now do you your child to suffer just because you dont like her now. whoaaa. just think of all your sacrifices that you made since you have started. do you want to start another more again? is your decision? woman sumtyms is nagger and materialistic but they are like that bcoz of also the family and children as you can see. we live in the world of money. for me being simple is enough. have a job, family, friend, house to live in, being healthy and enjoy life is enough
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Based only on what you've said, I think you need to work on your picking skills (may need therapy...not because youre nuts, just to help you figure out what you really want) as well as your backbone. Theres a difference between forgiving, or nice...and weak. it could be i may not know how is started...but the only thing im giving is how to treasure the positive part not the negative. ill accept your opinion
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Backbone i have plenty but thanks for the advice
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Backbone i have plenty but thanks for the advice
i can see you are a successful man. its the marrige that i am trying to manage. have a bonding with your children they were your treasure in life right now. im a friend 
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communicate with your partner and dont give up on marriage. if you settle on marriage you have to accept your partner on what she was. thats why you had your marriage with her. you love her inside and out. now do you your child to suffer just because you dont like her now. whoaaa. just think of all your sacrifices that you made since you have started. do you want to start another more again? is your decision? woman sumtyms is nagger and materialistic but they are like that bcoz of also the family and children as you can see. we live in the world of money. for me being simple is enough. have a job, family, friend, house to live in, being healthy and enjoy life is enough
The relationship/marriage has already ended my initial question was why does the other person change when your relationship becomes legal? My child is only suffereing due to the actions of my wife not me. The only relationship at the moment is with my daughter but thats not easy because being a single father in this country throws all your rights out of the window.... |
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The relationship/marriage has already ended my initial question was why does the other person change when your relationship becomes legal? My child is only suffereing due to the actions of my wife not me. The only relationship at the moment is with my daughter but thats not easy because being a single father in this country throws all your rights out of the window.... yeah you really dont know your wife at the moment. and marriage in the country as law is easy to withdraw. i grew up in a country where divorce is really not accepted. i came from a broken family. my mom and father separate when i was second yr hs. so as a third party i was hurt. this my life is very confidential. |
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I think what makes them hard are the physical illusions and the cultural emphasis on physical attraction.
people are so eager to hook up because of an initial(physical) chemistry, that they overlook all the truly important stuff that make a relationship work. things like actually enjoying each others company outside the bedroom(this doesnt mean just enjoying looking at someone,,lol) genuinely being able to make each other smile and laugh(not the smiling and laughing we do to be polite) being able to communicate and share feelings beyond being horny or having a good time having compatible priorities and levels of responsibility emotional availability(women especially try to hard to MEND males who arent able to show emotion) comfort and trust levels(if you have to be a 'secret' its probably not relationship material) mutual supportiveness (in other words,low levels of criticism, martyrism, defensiveness, and procrastination) mutual reliability and dependability and common relationship goals and values |
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yeah you really dont know your wife at the moment. and marriage in the country as law is easy to withdraw. i grew up in a country where divorce is really not accepted. i came from a broken family. my mom and father separate when i was second yr hs. so as a third party i was hurt. this my life is very confidential. I was bought up in childrens home all thru my childhood,whats that got to do with this? i knew my wife for 6 years before we got married!!!!! so i know her very well thanks 
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I think what makes them hard are the physical illusions and the cultural emphasis on physical attraction. people are so eager to hook up because of an initial(physical) chemistry, that they overlook all the truly important stuff that make a relationship work. things like actually enjoying each others company outside the bedroom(this doesnt mean just enjoying looking at someone,,lol) genuinely being able to make each other smile and laugh(not the smiling and laughing we do to be polite) being able to communicate and share feelings beyond being horny or having a good time having compatible priorities and levels of responsibility emotional availability(women especially try to hard to MEND males who arent able to show emotion) comfort and trust levels(if you have to be a 'secret' its probably not relationship material) mutual supportiveness (in other words,low levels of criticism, martyrism, defensiveness, and procrastination) mutual reliability and dependability and common relationship goals and values |
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I think what makes them hard are the physical illusions and the cultural emphasis on physical attraction. people are so eager to hook up because of an initial(physical) chemistry, that they overlook all the truly important stuff that make a relationship work. things like actually enjoying each others company outside the bedroom(this doesnt mean just enjoying looking at someone,,lol) genuinely being able to make each other smile and laugh(not the smiling and laughing we do to be polite) being able to communicate and share feelings beyond being horny or having a good time having compatible priorities and levels of responsibility emotional availability(women especially try to hard to MEND males who arent able to show emotion) comfort and trust levels(if you have to be a 'secret' its probably not relationship material) mutual supportiveness (in other words,low levels of criticism, martyrism, defensiveness, and procrastination) mutual reliability and dependability and common relationship goals and values Well summed up. lol, thanx, I think I might use it in my next profile on the next site I join...(being the expert on relationships and all,,lol) |
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