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| Topic: y do we cheat on women and women cheat on us... | |
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because we can seriously, we learn from action and reaction, and when the reaction is unpleasant enough we learn not to repeat the action but currently, people are too blase about infidelity and sex so there is no real DETERRENT to promiscuity or adultery I agree with Msharmony. |
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it's the government mind control man......
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There is a lot of very good commentary on here about the topic. Once I cheated on a girl that I was in a long relationship with. I think I cheated just to see if I could get the "hot chick". It was something stupid like that. Anyway, my girl found out about it and was crushed!! I never had a woman break-down emotionally like that before and it shocked me. That was when I realized the impact my actions - my selfish actions - had on another human being. It was a painful lesson. I am grateful for having learned from it and grown. I have never cheated since. So there you have it. For me, it was "selfish pride" that made me cheat. What a great post! Thanks for this. So how long ago was it...apparently you are not together anymore...did this break you up? That lesson happen almost 20 years ago. And, no, it didn't break us up, but, it was a really hard period of my life. My "girl" at the time was the mother of my children. It was other factors that broke us apart. |
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cuse everybody cheats on everybody....
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I've never understood why. I've never cheated and never would,
and if any partner of mine cheats-it's done, period, no excuse or second chance. |
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Because we're evolutionary programmed to do it. Men have a built in desire to have sex with as many women as possable. This works for men because he can spread his genes with a number of partners, therefore increasing his genes long term survival. Women on the other hand cannot increase the number of offspring by having a more partners. So, they go for high quality. Maybe she's not attractive enough to keep a high quality man of her own, but she may be able to attract one for a short term romp. Then she can trick her long term partner into thinking her child is actually his. Or, if she has a number of partners, none of them can be sure if they are the father or not and will all contribute the the child's well being. But, none of us have to cheat. It is a choice we make. But, the desire to cheat is built into all of us. |
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Because we're evolutionary programmed to do it. Men have a built in desire to have sex with as many women as possable. This works for men because he can spread his genes with a number of partners, therefore increasing his genes long term survival. Women on the other hand cannot increase the number of offspring by having a more partners. So, they go for high quality. Maybe she's not attractive enough to keep a high quality man of her own, but she may be able to attract one for a short term romp. Then she can trick her long term partner into thinking her child is actually his. Or, if she has a number of partners, none of them can be sure if they are the father or not and will all contribute the the child's well being. But, none of us have to cheat. It is a choice we make. But, the desire to cheat is built into all of us. I don't know what TV show you are talking about. I got my information from reading a few books on evolutionary psychology, such as The Red Queen, by Matt Ridly. There's a difference between cheating and feeling attraction. When you were with your wife did you ever masturbate while thinking of someone other than your wife? If so, you had desires for women other than your wife, but never cheated (although, there are some people that would consider that cheating). It's normal for both men and women to feel attraction for people other than our lovers because attraction is an emotion, like joy. Have you ever seen something that made you happy? It's the same with attraction. It happens before you have time to think about it. An attractive women enters your peripheral vision and you find yourself looking before you have time to think about it. Something in the primative parts of your brain take over your body and causes you to move your head and eyes, then you think to yourself, "pretty girl." That is temptation. What you do next IS within your control. You could say hello to her or you may simply enjoy her beauty, draw a little energy from it, but never think of taking it any further. To deny our desires is to deny the very thing that makes us human. |
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...personally i think it has to do with integrity..either you have it or you don't.. 
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...personally i think it has to do with integrity..either you have it or you don't..
amen, desire and action have a bit of a grey area between them I may have an evolutionary desire to eat, but that doesnt cause me to go take other peoples food,,, its a matter of knowing right from wrong and giving a damn,,,, |
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it's the government mind control man...... I'll take what your having.. |
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