be in a relationship to make them happy? Why do we need to rush things and race to the finish line?

Is there not anything else that makes us just as happy?

Most of the men & women I have noticed who post about looking for a life long partner are people my age. That is why I don't understand what the hurry? Then they complain that they got heartbroken but want Mr./Mrs.Right right now?

Anyone else question this?

cause we`re all hungry for love &


we want to know someone is goin to grow old with us and we`re not gonna die alone

or should I say..we want that guarantee...

instant gratification....

i have always wondered the same thing...i think it's insecurity

ok..I shut up now....

( funny..how talking about others..one always ends up talkin about themselves )

People are very suggestible (or mentally lazy) and we live in a culture where the idea of a "significant other" is emphasized as being necessary for one's happiness (hence the use of "significant").

TV, movies, religion, tradition, advertising, etc., all bombard us with the idea that we can't be happy unless we have "The One" in our lives.

But like most things found from TV, movies, religion, tradition, advertising, etc., this is a myth designed for the purpose of manipulating people's minds and behaviors.

It comes as a bit of a shock to learn that the people we THINK might be "significant others" turn out to be neurotic control freaks who are totally incapable of generating a thought that hasn't been done on an infinite number of sitcoms already.

Some of us let go of myths easier than others.

what he said....

Give me the following....

Pizza, Cable tv, internet, books, diet coke, and hookers and I am happy.

It depends of what relationship.I could just say that "I am interested in someone and I'm focusing on her" by saying that "I'm in a relationship".

Not necessarily that I'm gonna marry her or stay with her forever, but right now I'm not dealing with other women for now.

but do you need to be interested in the opposite sex to be happy?

I would be happy too if I had all that.

IMO those are the types that do not like themselves or the lives they live. They figure someone else will come along and fill the void they can not fulfill themselves.

As for me, I am happy. But it sure would be nice to share that happiness with someone every evening. Yet, I am not in any rush to any finish line. Someone in my life would be the whipped cream on my banana split.

Oh I see now. No, not necessarily. I haven't dated for 2 years..then had a date here and there in the past few months..and I can't say that I am an unhappy person.

sex.

Welcome to the society of 'instant gratification.'

We want everything and we want it now, not later, we don't want to work for it, trust and communication is worthless. We want Mr./Mrs. Perfect right now. Thank you, society, for creating a beast that we cannot control or damn to the depths of hell.

and that`s the whole scary truth

Because we are taught growing up that we need it, and force-trained into believing it. Some people wise up, and others don't. We also tend to mistake friendship and companionship in general, for the need to have a relationship, and that's not necessarily true. We don't focus on families and friends, and think we are miserable without the lover.

But really, we don't need it, we're just indoctrinated into believing we do, and that we will be miserable without it.

well

i dont know if i want a life-long partner....i just want a companion...ya know...fix this...**** me...go home........

at your age i was makin bacon....and makin babies....now its "me time"

the man who is along for the ride....better hold on!!!

Hmmmm...I find the same observations fascinating....

The only way to find happiness/contentment....is to create it in yourself...there is no longevity to pinning your happiness on another...why obligate someone?

I am completely content within, without and surrounded...and happily, joyfully single...

Not sure about being "joyfully single" - but being 'single' has been a deliberate choice over the last few years. Personally I find the whole concept of 'must have' a relationship with a 'significant other' strange. Over the years I have observed Mr and Miss 'normal' running about in what often seems to be rather frantic circles either trying to maintain an existing relationship - or find a new one (even - in some cases - where they are still in one .....) For me, the most important aspect of any relationship is friendship. What on earth is the point of being with a significant other that you actually have little in common with - or indeed (if you're honest) don't really get along with?

Please don't get me wrong. I am not hostile to love, relationships, commitment or any other aspect of the whole thing. I do however tend to question whether many of us really appreciate just what 'love' is and I suspect that many get 'love' confused with that natural and normal rush we experience when we first get together with a potential 'significant other' - believing (falsely) that once this wears off (which it invariably does and is otherwise known as lust) that therefor we no longer love that person. Reality suggests that 'love' is really still wanting to be with that person - even when you know all those annoying things, even when you have faced the disappointment of realizing that he or she is not exactly the person you originally thought they were.

On the other hand - I might just be talking total bollox .... ;-D