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| Topic: Can Your Self Talk Create Additional Stress? Yes! | |
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Attitude, Self Talk and Stress
Can Your Self Talk Create Additional Stress? Yes! By Elizabeth Scott, M.S., About.com Guide Updated June 18, 2008 It’s well-known in the therapeutic community that negative statements from others can erode our sense of self-worth. Children tend to believe negative assessments of them from teachers and parents, and develop a compromised self-concept when criticized on a regular basis. Researchers estimate that it’s necessary for the ratio of positive-to-negative comments be at least five to one for a relationship to be healthy and survive long-term. For these reasons, we’re taught not to let others put us down, but sometimes the person eroding our sense of self-worth and limiting our potential is us! That’s right, our self talk, or the words our inner dialogue uses when we think, can increase our stress levels, limit our potential, and color our experience with a negative pen. Here are some more detailed reasons why this happens, with links to resources you can use to change your mind and turn self-sabotage into self-mastery: Language Colors Experience Though it’s not clear as to what extent this occurs, it has been found that the types of words we use can alter expectations and even our perceptions of reality. For example: •If you’ve been told that a difficult person is ‘a nightmare to work with’, you will probably perceive that person as more frustrating than if you’ve been told they’re ‘particular’ or ‘somewhat demanding’. •If your dentist tells you, ‘This will hurt. A lot!”, you will probably find a procedure more painful than if you’ve been told ‘You may experience some discomfort.’ •Research has found that people who speak different languages may see the same things differently based on the words their language uses to describe these things. For example, research has found that language can affect the perception of color. (People who spoke a certain language that classifies blue and green as different shades of the same color were less able than English speakers to differentiate colors that toed the line between blue and green.) These effects influence the right brain more than the left, but the influence is clearly significant. As it subtly colors what you perceive and what you dwell on, negative self-talk can alter your experience of stress in the following ways: Increased Perception of Stress: When your self talk is negative, you may perceive things as more stressful. For example, when you tell yourself something is ‘difficult’ or ‘unfair’, it becomes more stressful to deal with than if you tell yourself it’s a ‘challenge’, or even a ‘test’. Using self-talk that is optimistic rather than pessimistic has stress management benefits, productivity benefits and even health benefits that have been proven by research. Self-Limitation: If you say “I can’t handle this”, you more likely can’t. This is because your subconscious mind tends to believe the thoughts it hears. You can limit your abilities by telling yourself you “can’t”, that “this is too hard” or that you “shouldn’t even try”. Limited Thinking: When you tell yourself you can’t handle something (or some other self-limiting thought), you tend to stop looking for solutions. For example, notice the difference between telling yourself you can’t handle something and asking yourself how you will handle something. Doesn’t the second thought feel more hopeful and produce more creativity? Negative self talk tends to be a self-fulfilling prophecy! Stopping negative thoughts and creating habitually positive internal dialogue can reduce stress and empower you. Here are some resources to help you change negative self talk into positive self talk. http://stress.about.com/od/optimismspirituality/a/selftalk.htm It really does work. |
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This is extremely interesting. I try to pick the words I use carefully as well.
As an example, I never say anymore "I don't have time for...." I instead say, "I haven't made the time for...." or something similar. Thanks for the article and it has already inspired me to dust off an old article I started to write about how I have have learned to use language more carefully. Thanks again. |
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I would also like to add that I use self-effacing humor in many situations for laughs but also as a way to diffuse tense situations or insults.
The problem comes that after awhile, it may become self defeating in a way as well. Is it possible that after many years of doing this, I can then begin to believe some of the things I say about myself? I have seen that some people who don't know me assume I have low self esteem which I don't really have, simply because of my humor. Do I have doubts from time to time? Yes, but I have a good sense of self esteem. Is this why many stand-up comics feel depressed? I once had a 30 minute stand-up routine written (it was on a floppy disk that was corrupted and I lost the data but I am rewriting it) that was very self-effacing. Food for thought. |
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Edited by
Dancere
on
Mon 07/26/10 06:42 PM
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I'd HIGHLY recommend the book: Power vs. Force by David Hawkins
It is all about the power of thought/spoken words - and the import and impact of each, every single thought/spoken word ... The book concerns itself w/ the premise that via kinesiological (muscle) testing - the results for the precise calculation of any given word's vital force quotient can be gauged ... Positive/healing words vs Negative/destructive words ... On a scale of 0 to 1000 ... Positive words only begin at 200, anything below has a negative impact ... The higher the vibrational frequency, the more life giving the word ... Positive thinking is so important, it is CRUCIAL! And? Positive thinking really is a cumulative tapestry of carefully sewn positive words strung together!!! A fantastic, uplifting and life altering read and concept ...  ... Guard your mind!
Edit: Thanx for catchin' the mistake in time for me to edit, Chris ...  ... I love Hawking too, but I was meaning to correctly refer to David Hawkins ... 
Cheers, mate ...  ... Proving that ... You are very GOOD and careful w/ 'the word'!!! 
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Attitude, Self Talk and Stress Can Your Self Talk Create Additional Stress? Yes! By Elizabeth Scott, M.S., About.com Guide Updated June 18, 2008 It’s well-known in the therapeutic community that negative statements from others can erode our sense of self-worth. Children tend to believe negative assessments of them from teachers and parents, and develop a compromised self-concept when criticized on a regular basis. Researchers estimate that it’s necessary for the ratio of positive-to-negative comments be at least five to one for a relationship to be healthy and survive long-term. For these reasons, we’re taught not to let others put us down, but sometimes the person eroding our sense of self-worth and limiting our potential is us! That’s right, our self talk, or the words our inner dialogue uses when we think, can increase our stress levels, limit our potential, and color our experience with a negative pen. Here are some more detailed reasons why this happens, with links to resources you can use to change your mind and turn self-sabotage into self-mastery: Language Colors Experience Though it’s not clear as to what extent this occurs, it has been found that the types of words we use can alter expectations and even our perceptions of reality. For example: •If you’ve been told that a difficult person is ‘a nightmare to work with’, you will probably perceive that person as more frustrating than if you’ve been told they’re ‘particular’ or ‘somewhat demanding’. •If your dentist tells you, ‘This will hurt. A lot!”, you will probably find a procedure more painful than if you’ve been told ‘You may experience some discomfort.’ •Research has found that people who speak different languages may see the same things differently based on the words their language uses to describe these things. For example, research has found that language can affect the perception of color. (People who spoke a certain language that classifies blue and green as different shades of the same color were less able than English speakers to differentiate colors that toed the line between blue and green.) These effects influence the right brain more than the left, but the influence is clearly significant. As it subtly colors what you perceive and what you dwell on, negative self-talk can alter your experience of stress in the following ways: Increased Perception of Stress: When your self talk is negative, you may perceive things as more stressful. For example, when you tell yourself something is ‘difficult’ or ‘unfair’, it becomes more stressful to deal with than if you tell yourself it’s a ‘challenge’, or even a ‘test’. Using self-talk that is optimistic rather than pessimistic has stress management benefits, productivity benefits and even health benefits that have been proven by research. Self-Limitation: If you say “I can’t handle this”, you more likely can’t. This is because your subconscious mind tends to believe the thoughts it hears. You can limit your abilities by telling yourself you “can’t”, that “this is too hard” or that you “shouldn’t even try”. Limited Thinking: When you tell yourself you can’t handle something (or some other self-limiting thought), you tend to stop looking for solutions. For example, notice the difference between telling yourself you can’t handle something and asking yourself how you will handle something. Doesn’t the second thought feel more hopeful and produce more creativity? Negative self talk tends to be a self-fulfilling prophecy! Stopping negative thoughts and creating habitually positive internal dialogue can reduce stress and empower you. Here are some resources to help you change negative self talk into positive self talk. http://stress.about.com/od/optimismspirituality/a/selftalk.htm It really does work. It depends on the self talk......self talk and beliefs into positive thinking and creating positive spirit can also alleviate stress.....dependent on the mental and physical awareness and control of mind and body the individual possesses, as well as, the ability to evaluate the variables and makes correlating changes..... |
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The book, "I'm OK - You're OK" by Thomas A. Harris" helped me.
http://www.ericberne.com/Im_OK_Youre_OK.htm |
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Attitude, Self Talk and Stress Can Your Self Talk Create Additional Stress? Yes! By Elizabeth Scott, M.S., About.com Guide Updated June 18, 2008 It’s well-known in the therapeutic community that negative statements from others can erode our sense of self-worth. Children tend to believe negative assessments of them from teachers and parents, and develop a compromised self-concept when criticized on a regular basis. Researchers estimate that it’s necessary for the ratio of positive-to-negative comments be at least five to one for a relationship to be healthy and survive long-term. For these reasons, we’re taught not to let others put us down, but sometimes the person eroding our sense of self-worth and limiting our potential is us! That’s right, our self talk, or the words our inner dialogue uses when we think, can increase our stress levels, limit our potential, and color our experience with a negative pen. Here are some more detailed reasons why this happens, with links to resources you can use to change your mind and turn self-sabotage into self-mastery: Language Colors Experience Though it’s not clear as to what extent this occurs, it has been found that the types of words we use can alter expectations and even our perceptions of reality. For example: •If you’ve been told that a difficult person is ‘a nightmare to work with’, you will probably perceive that person as more frustrating than if you’ve been told they’re ‘particular’ or ‘somewhat demanding’. •If your dentist tells you, ‘This will hurt. A lot!”, you will probably find a procedure more painful than if you’ve been told ‘You may experience some discomfort.’ •Research has found that people who speak different languages may see the same things differently based on the words their language uses to describe these things. For example, research has found that language can affect the perception of color. (People who spoke a certain language that classifies blue and green as different shades of the same color were less able than English speakers to differentiate colors that toed the line between blue and green.) These effects influence the right brain more than the left, but the influence is clearly significant. As it subtly colors what you perceive and what you dwell on, negative self-talk can alter your experience of stress in the following ways: Increased Perception of Stress: When your self talk is negative, you may perceive things as more stressful. For example, when you tell yourself something is ‘difficult’ or ‘unfair’, it becomes more stressful to deal with than if you tell yourself it’s a ‘challenge’, or even a ‘test’. Using self-talk that is optimistic rather than pessimistic has stress management benefits, productivity benefits and even health benefits that have been proven by research. Self-Limitation: If you say “I can’t handle this”, you more likely can’t. This is because your subconscious mind tends to believe the thoughts it hears. You can limit your abilities by telling yourself you “can’t”, that “this is too hard” or that you “shouldn’t even try”. Limited Thinking: When you tell yourself you can’t handle something (or some other self-limiting thought), you tend to stop looking for solutions. For example, notice the difference between telling yourself you can’t handle something and asking yourself how you will handle something. Doesn’t the second thought feel more hopeful and produce more creativity? Negative self talk tends to be a self-fulfilling prophecy! Stopping negative thoughts and creating habitually positive internal dialogue can reduce stress and empower you. Here are some resources to help you change negative self talk into positive self talk. http://stress.about.com/od/optimismspirituality/a/selftalk.htm It really does work. It depends on the self talk......self talk and beliefs into positive thinking and creating positive spirit can also alleviate stress.....dependent on the mental and physical awareness and control of mind and body the individual possesses, as well as, the ability to evaluate the variables and makes correlating changes..... That is what the article said. |
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This article is nothing new to ponder or even suprising in any way.......Look at martial arts, meditation, oriental teaching such as Confucious, religious aspects all ways of learning control of mind body and spirit......etc.
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Edited by
Dragoness
on
Mon 07/26/10 06:17 PM
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This is extremely interesting. I try to pick the words I use carefully as well. As an example, I never say anymore "I don't have time for...." I instead say, "I haven't made the time for...." or something similar. Thanks for the article and it has already inspired me to dust off an old article I started to write about how I have have learned to use language more carefully. Thanks again. your welcome |
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Edited by
chris_pc
on
Mon 07/26/10 06:26 PM
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I'd HIGHLY recommend the book: Power vs. Force by Steven Hawking It is all about the power of thought/spoken words - and the import and impact of each, every single thought/spoken word ... The book concerns itself w/ the premise that via kinesiological (muscle) testing - the results for the precise calculation of any given word's vital force quotient can be gauged ... Positive/healing words vs Negative/destructive words ... On a scale of 0 to 1000 ... Positive words only begin at 200, anything below has a negative impact ... The higher the vibrational frequency, the more life giving the word ... Positive thinking is so important, it is CRUCIAL! And? Positive thinking really is a cumulative tapestry of carefully sewn positive words strung together!!! A fantastic, uplifting and life altering read and concept ... ... Guard your mind!
Thanks, I have added Hawking's book to my list of "to read" Hawking is an amazing inspiration. What I like about him most is how he attracts people from all walks and life and demographics. Also for a man of his intellect, he speaks and writes in terms that most anyone can relate to and understand, which is a difficult task for most mathematicians and scientists. Thanks for the book suggestion. BTW...the author is David Hawkins but what I said about Stephen Hawking above still holds true. |
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I'd HIGHLY recommend the book: Power vs. Force by Steven Hawking It is all about the power of thought/spoken words - and the import and impact of each, every single thought/spoken word ... The book concerns itself w/ the premise that via kinesiological (muscle) testing - the results for the precise calculation of any given word's vital force quotient can be gauged ... Positive/healing words vs Negative/destructive words ... On a scale of 0 to 1000 ... Positive words only begin at 200, anything below has a negative impact ... The higher the vibrational frequency, the more life giving the word ... Positive thinking is so important, it is CRUCIAL! And? Positive thinking really is a cumulative tapestry of carefully sewn positive words strung together!!! A fantastic, uplifting and life altering read and concept ... ... Guard your mind!
This is interesting too, thanks. |
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Edited by
Dancere
on
Mon 07/26/10 06:42 PM
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I'd HIGHLY recommend the book: Power vs. Force by David Hawkins It is all about the power of thought/spoken words - and the import and impact of each, every single thought/spoken word ... The book concerns itself w/ the premise that via kinesiological (muscle) testing - the results for the precise calculation of any given word's vital force quotient can be gauged ... Positive/healing words vs Negative/destructive words ... On a scale of 0 to 1000 ... Positive words only begin at 200, anything below has a negative impact ... The higher the vibrational frequency, the more life giving the word ... Positive thinking is so important, it is CRUCIAL! And? Positive thinking really is a cumulative tapestry of carefully sewn positive words strung together!!! A fantastic, uplifting and life altering read and concept ... ... Guard your mind!
Thanks, I have added Hawking's book to my list of "to read" Hawking is an amazing inspiration. What I like about him most is how he attracts people from all walks and life and demographics. Also for a man of his intellect, he speaks and writes in terms that most anyone can relate to and understand, which is a difficult task for most mathematicians and scientists. Thanks for the book suggestion. BTW...the author is David Hawkins but what I said about Stephen Hawking above still holds true. WOW! I'm kinda shocked at that one, almost kewl a mistake ... Hahaha ... Freudian slip ... I love Hawking as well ... SO glad you spotted that though ... Kinda like the entire subject ... CARE w/ words ... I was on the phone for partial of the type ... 
Doh ... ... Means a great deal that you took the time to really read and absorb ...
Yes: David Hawkins ... Ya can even find him speaking on youtubies ... You will LOVE his book ... And you will love him, as well ... Such a wizened guru-type, yet everyone's G'Pa!!! |
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Thoughts are things.
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