to start, I've had a hell of a lot of really bad relationships so I'm not sure what is good and what is not. I've been with a guy for 7 months now and I don't know whether to try to improve or move on. we have pretty good communication, hardly any physical relations (he had a stroke and its not a good thing for him anymore - me i could have it once or twice a week, but not complaining). We seem to be just friends but he says he cares deeply for me and I'm not sure what I feel. I'm so confused on this... I sometimes just want to end it but then he helps me with so much and i try to return the favor. Is no chemistry a sign to move on? I've had a lot of chemistry that didn't work so I'm really messed up on this one! HELP!!!!

When you stated that you feel that it is more friendship and that you are confused about how you feel for him, that is a good sign that you should move along. Caring deeply for someone is nice, but even when you do care and you still feel confused about the relationship, well that pretty much gives you your answer. Be there for him as a friend, but I honestly don't think you are getting what you want out of this "relationship" with him.

Sounds like your really good friends than any thing...if neither of you are making move...remain friends..FRIENDS are hard to come by

I think he feels more for me than I feel... but then again I dont' feel much of anything anymore from being hurt so much. So I dont know whether to try to feel more for someone who cares so much for me. Does that make sense. He is a wonderful guy but I am so afraid of men now I am wishy washy! LOL

this is always a best bet. things can change from there if things get more to your liking.

Can't make youself feel something for someone...when it isn't there. You can prolong the inevitable. But I would break it off and be his friend.

ok, so if he feels more for me than I do, and i want to remain his close friend, how to I tell him without breaking his heart? He was in the process of a divorce where his ex pulled up a uhaul while he was out of town and took what she wanted from the household when we met. I can't bear to hurt this great guy... but I know dragging it on is really shitty.

You guys seem to be good friends, but you don't have to be lovers... u need more than just friendship in a relationship, chemistry, attraction, and more importantly Love.
Obviously you don’t feel about him the same way he feels about you, and this dilemma will always hover over your head as long as you are with him.
I would say Move on…. If you stick around and become his friend, It might hurts him more seeing you with someone else.

Best wishes.

It sounds like the past is still hanging around!! I think maybe you need to keep this guy as a friend and try to figure out how to get over thinking that men are always going to hurt you!! There really are some good guys out there and they do not all deserve to be judged by your past!!
I myself would rather have a great friend over a boyfriend any day of the week!! Boyfriends come and go...Friends are very hard to find!!

I am very wishy washy too..... It seems like as soon as i let my guard down i end up hurt...hence why im single

I agree... just don't want to hurt him. He's been hurt really bad and I just tried to be there for him but now its just not a spark or anything. Keep hoping he sees it to but no such luck!

There is no "Easy" way to do this. Nor is there a way for it to not be painful. You just have to tell him, face to face, that while he is so nice to you, and you care for him, and you want to be his friend (because you don't want to lose him), but that you just feel that the relationship is not going anywhere and that you do not feel it will change. He has to understand how you feel and why, and talking to him is the best route. You can't help what happened to him in the past. That has nothing to do with you. But you can show him respect by talking to him about this.

NOT talking to him is going to hurt him more in the end!! You just have to sit down with him and be honest, isn't that what true friends do?

thanks. just really bad at telling men I'm not into them. been hurt so many times I have a hard time being the one to hurt.

ok, this is making me so sad, I wonder if I should try to make it work... see how confused I am about relationships! He's so nice but if there is no physical attraction for me I dont' know how to handle it. It's always been important to me that the men I'm with are sexually attracted to me and now I have someone who is wanting more than just sex... hello???? what the hell????? never been in that situation! LOL

Are you in love with him??

don't think I'm in love with him... to soon for me to tell.

There's your answer. Time to break it off.

You want to make this work because he LIKES you? If you are not feeling it and there is NO spark...what are you thinking? Not to be mean or nothing, but you don't have to be desperate...you are a cute girl. I think you are really confused..maybe you need to spend some time away from him and see how you really feel????

Is he still married?