You can't understand why someone (me as well) would suggest you run? DRAMA; dysfunction; co-dependency; enabling!

What you have typed is not normal. Why would you want to live a life like this? Suicidal?? She has issues. You are too young to get involved with crap like this and you will ruin your life, develop poor ideas of what "love" is and never have a functional relationship.

Just reading this post is enough to shake my head and scream "NO!”

But ... good luck with that ... *glad it's not me*

move on to a new family!

Lemme re-think that 'sit down and talk' idea.

Ya know, there are enough everyday, ordinary problems that can tear a relationship a part. This doesn't sound like a good situation...nor one that will be resolved. The best to you...but as someone else said, I'm glad it's not happening to me.

I agree with everything MelodyGirl has said on this.

Leave it for the daughter to stand up to her own parents

I concur.

That's when you marry her & make the inlaws lives a living hell!! At least that's what I did!

The way I see it whom ever has the set of parents that are like that. Then it is their place to put their foot down with their own family. If they don't think enough of me to stand up to their parents then I don't need to be with them.

It is no ones business how others choose to live their lives let them live it and if it don't work out then it would only be up to them....

They can think what they want to but there is no reason for family members to be out right rude to anyone. They could at least be civil when they are around each other.

Ahhh sweet payback :-)

My FIL hated my guts! The feeling was mutual!!!

Dude,,listen,,seeing as now I know she's her OWN person here,,,Then she and you have nothing to really be needed to go through if YOUR BOTH IN LOVE!
YOU are allowing her parents to MAKE YOU have a problem inside about them and who you are......DON'T let THEM have ANY bearing on your guys lives,,,,,IF SHE FEELS SHE HAS TO HAVE THEIR APROVAL OF HER PICK OF MAN OR PARTNER IN LIFE,,THEN SHE'S JUST WRONG FOR ANYBODY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
MOVE-ON and find a lady who has fully grown-up! W/O HANG-UPS as to FIT HER PARENTS EYES AND MINDS...
EVERYONE SHOULD LOVE THEIR FOLKS,,but at adult age,,THE PARENTS SHOULD ALLOW THEIR CHILREN TO MAKE-UP THEIR OWN MINDS, w/o any NEGITIVE GUILTS on them of their ONE....
I mean with-in reasons of norm,,,SURE,,if your a covicted mass murderer and just released from Prison,,,YES,,I MIGHT TRY and CHANGE MY DAUGHTERS MIND of loving you,,,,lol
But just based on NOTHING,,,THATS NOT A REASON..
But KNOW this LIKE Melodygirl has already said,,
IF YOUR LADY HERE,,feels it or THAT an issue NOW,,,then to go on with her in MORE complex ways like living together or marriage.
THEN,,THAT WILL ALWAYS BE AN ISSUE THAT SEPARATES YOU BOTH FROM EACH OTHER..and THAT DRAMA,,,will cause MUCH HEART ACHE weekly.
So,,,,,,,GOOD LUCK with your choice....

take a shite on their lawn, then get drunk and make a pass for her mom. when she knocks you back, imediatly with no hesitation, make a pass for her dad.

when theyre standing all confused and shocked go out side and roll in you previously prepared pile of poop, strip naked and run around and around the outside of their house, shouting "im a dirty poop monster, im a dirty poop monster"

then at least they will have something cool to whine about

break up with her and tell her the reason is because her parents are driving the two of you apart.



. . .

he said he CAN understand why people say run, but he`s never been loved like this before

i say, she is 37 and her mummy tells her what to do... thats why I would run

stephen, i know your a sweet niave guy, just think about what your doing.

and if all else fails, "get rid" of the problem

(kill them stephen, you wont get caught)

lonetar, she was telling me that SHE feels like killing them in a text message yesterday, but didn't want to go to jail so may as well kill herself. I don't think it's right to condone violence, and it would be my wish if at all possible for all the hatred and negativity to me to stop, now I am not saying I don't take some responsibility, I've made some decisions in this relationship that I definitely regret, if I could do it all over again I would have waited for longer until I visited her so many times.

"break up with her and tell her the reason is because her parents are driving the two of you apart."

if that was going to make her move out and stand on her own two feet, I might consider that option...unfortunately, that would be more likely to send the message "you can't trust this man, he won't be there for you when times get hard," and would only push her away from me, and I could lose her forever.

Iam4u thank you for your advice, you show much wisdom. So do you gossip.

Tessa, I find your side of it all inspiring :)

Melody Girl:

"You can't understand why someone (me as well) would suggest you run? DRAMA; dysfunction; co-dependency; enabling!"

Don't all relationships have drama? Is there any relationship that does not have some form of dysfunction? Also, what do you mean by co-dependency and enabling?

"What you have typed is not normal. Why would you want to live a life like this? Suicidal?? She has issues. You are too young to get involved with crap like this and you will ruin your life, develop poor ideas of what "love" is and never have a functional relationship."

Okay, fair call; so what would you say is a GOOD idea about what love is? what does a functional relationship look like to you? How do you feel it will "ruin" my life? And furthermore, what do you consider a "normal" relationship?

I am sorry for playing devil's advocate here, I hope you know the only reason I am asking these questions is because I respect your opinion Melody as much as anyone else's on here.

Kill them all and go on the lam.

Make their daughter.....EXTATICALLY HAPPY!!!!!!!!!!! really pisses them off!!!!!!

and you don't see a little psychotic here? seriously...

Missed this, my reply still stands.

Hi! First, sorry I misread your statement that you DO understand why some members said to run away. I read, "...can't understand..."

I can't define what "real love" is for you or anyone but myself.

I know that my expectations in a partner are HIGH and I would never allow even a friend in my life with as many problems and dysfunction as you have described.

"Normal" is subjective to the lifestyle in which we live or were raised. Some people think its normal to steal or feign while others would never consider this pathology.

I personally don't put up with drama; no, I don't believe relationships should have drama. If people allow it then they probably think it's normal. For me, drama and baggage is not normal. That is the way I choose to live my life.

I have a quick trigger and a sensitive BS/red flag meter. I have a big red circle, with a diagonal line through it, on my forehead that rules my world. How I came up with my idea of normal is only valid in my life. You will develop your own ideas of what is acceptable and what isn't as you experience life.

When you ask for opinions on a public forum you will have a different answer from each person. There are no absolutes. Use common sense and think about consequences rather than thinking emotionally. How you handle this will, of course, shape your dating future and dictate your relationship skills (or lack of skills).

Enabling: allow, facilitate, make possible
Co-dependent: mutually supporting, mutually dependent
Basically, the two of you will encourage and support each other’s bad habits or abnormal/impaired behavior.

Personally, I would rather shoot myself in the foot that get envolved with anyone like you have described.

Remember, this is YOUR life and no one will look after you but YOU. Life is too short to be miserable or to constantly ride a rollercoaster of other people's garbage. It’s better to be single than to be in a toxic relationship. Relationships are not difficult with the right person nor should they cause you to post for help on an internet forum.

Best wishes with internalizing this situation.