no disagreeing would be utopia which doesn't exist... If one does not give consideration their partners feelings then I doubt they'll have a partner for very long... To keep moving on is a solution when things just don't align at all but to keep moving on b/c she's annoyed that you didn't get milk or pick up your socks, well that's just finding a reason to be alone... Alone as in no SO not as is you have 30 friends you hang out with all week long...

..but one doesnt HAVE to put up with crap,, it is a choice.

Im single, becuase I CHOOSE not to put up with crap

(crap being hypocrites who feel they are there to be 'spoiled' and I am there to be used,,,basically. I want to treat a man like a prince, but only one who wants to treat me like a princess)

hmmm, IMHO: when you are single - you think of yourself and it's ok, because you are single... being in a relationship - I do not think it is ok to think only of yourself, you should give your SO, partner, lover, ect... the BEST of you (love, affection, consideration and respect) as well as the worst of you (leaving your socks on the floor, being late, not listening on occasion)... BUT - it shows the lack of respect, when you don't listen and compromise...

to user the OP's example "Why should she care if I leave my socks on the floor, if she cares so much - why does she simply pick them up for me"... he is missing the opposing viewpoint of the other person who is likely thinking "why does he not pick up his socks, he must not care for me if he knows this bothers me - but will not compromise"...

respect
understanding
love
affection
compromise

*sigh* it's not really that difficult, if you truly care for them...

$.02

too many people are too unwilling to change in the slightest.
the biggest/silliest one is the toilet seat issue. neither gender wants to accommodate the other. it's like people are afraid that they'll lose a part of their individuality if they alter their behavior even when that modification could be an improvement and could benefit both parties.
i say give a little, take a little. "honey, i'll learn to put the seat down if you stop sending me out for your feminine products."
make deals. then you can say that you traded one thing for another and you won't feel slighted.

i was just using the toilet seat thing as an example.


. . .

Sooo true...

If a man goes and buys my tampons without as much as a flinch....

I will make that man the happiest man alive!!!!

The way I can answer this question is, what kind of crap did she have to put up with from me? Well it's a short list. She said my clothes were wrinkled. They weren't that bad just a few, and I don't do ironing very well. I'm allowed that weakness, she never took out the trash.
She said I slept in too late. There was more for me to do and be interested in at night, so that's why I was up late. I felt that mornings sucked. She said I didn't watch tv with her enough. Well, her shows I was not interested in, and I found them quite boring or annoying, so I let her watch, and I did my thing. She hated my kind of music, so I got headphones, and listened to my music and let her listen to hers. She didn't like the fact that I didn't clean the litter box enough. Well it's pretty nasty, and I didn't feel like doing it every day. A little 50/50 on that responsibility would have been nice.
I would also like to be pleasantly asked to do something, not barked at. She didn't like how sexual I was, she said I was oversexed, and that she wasn't in the mood frequently. Puzzling, because she cheated on me, even though I gave her plenty of attention in the love department. Sadly she did not reciprocate. So like I said, a fairly short list, and it seems to me that problems need to be solved no matter who solves it, instead of being complained about and over-exaggerated. Harmony works if you put some effort into it, and you do things to help, love, and show support for the other person.
So I think the "crap" is self-inflicted by the perpetrator. The one flinging it is the one with the problem. So, people that like to b**ch and moan about every little thing, need to check themselves before they wreck themselves. Be part of the solution, not part of the problem.

My first sentence is messed up that's what I get for multi-tasking... I meant.... No disagreeing in a relationship would be utopia, etc.. Excuse my error that may have caused confusion..

'I have a giant penis'

'I make 20 gazillion dollars a day'

' I have a healthy love for my mother, and only live in her basement because she is scared of the boiler'

'My ex wife REALLY was a *****'


etc.......etc.....etc....

I usually don't respond to threads like these but it's Thursday and I'm feeling punchy, so here goes, the "crap" I refuse to put up with from any man:

Lying- in any form, I don't believe in "little white lies" a lie is a lie, if you can't be completely honest with me, move along, cheating, making promises they have no intention of ever keeping, ignoring me, abuse- mental, verbal, physical or emotional, not having enough time for me, selfishness, poor hygiene, never having anything positive to say about anyone, treating me like a maid/servant, pressuring me to do things I'm not comfortable with, trying to "handle" me, ie. telling me what they think I want to hear and then going off and doing whatever they damn well please, not calling when they say they will, being unavailable all the time, everyone comes before me, excessive arrogance, no ambition or drive to be anything more than what they already are, not listening, devaluing everything that is important to me, jealousy, trying to control me, expecting me to always build up their ego while not giving a **** about mine, being inconsiderate of my feelings, making lame excuses, and cowardice.

I'm sure I've missed a few, but that's what I've come up with so far. I'd rather die alone than spend 5 minutes with any man who thinks he is so freaking amazing that I'm supposed to put up with his "crap" just to be with him. Relationships should be about give and take, if one person is doing all the giving, and the other person is doing all the taking, that's not a relationship, it's a business arrangement, and unless the pay is huge, it's not worth it to me.

Life's too short; if someone isn't what you want in every way, it's best to just move on. That's what I always do.

You my dear should respond to these more, you added value

Thanks prncs.

We all carry our own little bags of crap around with us.
Some folks in discrete brown paper, others in clear plastic.
For some reason most are unwilling to deposit them in the trash and make life smell just a little bit sweeter for the rest of us.

I realized I should explain myself better. I had two incidents in my life where I was mad at someone for something trivial. One being a relative and one being a man I dated. Both died; one health reasons, and the other a tragic accident.I have to live with the fact that the last thing I said was how mad I was at these people over petty little things. Can't see myself getting mad at a guy for leaving his socks on the floor when I may never see him again. Life is too precious and I always make it a point to tell my s/o that I love him everyday and to have a great day because I may not see him again. Its a harsh fact of life that I hope all you never hae to face. Cheers.

that's what happens when you eat too many skittles.
definitely a rainbow i don't want to tastes.




. . .

you want to taste other rainbows?


Navy that's unfortuante I understand what you're saying..

This is getting into the area of CHANGING someone. It never works. They try hard for a while, but sooner or later they fall back on their old ways. They become themselves.

If someone does (or doesn't do) spomething that gets on your nerves you should take a look at it and decide if you can live with it or not. If you can live with it, shut up about it. If not, leave the relationship.

Everyone will be happier without the nagging. Every happy couple I know lives this way. My mom and dad, who have been married for more than 60 years are a great example.