now I have to make noises???? I'm really messing this up.

The parts are no longer available.

i'm not against being attracted to someone for looks... or for lust.. i'm just sayin... take the leap of faith once in a while. It doesnt work for everyone. Its not suppost to.... but the excitement and follow up after the risk is usually worth while. Whether it is by finding someone new, or because you've begun to learn from the mistake.

Did you try ebay? I hear they have everything....

I never pegged you as the quiet type.

I've never been attracted to one particular type before. I just like who I like.

I agree on most points. I very much agree that sometimes, it is surprizing to whom you are attracted...

I let my heart decice the "heart aspects", my brain decide the "intellectual aspects", my body decide the "physical aspects" and my spirit decide the "spiritual aspects"...

What I find, is an initial attraction based on one of the "four aspects"... and then I get to know someone to see if the other three are there in any real way....

I listed to all four parts - however, it seems to take some time to get enough information on the remaining three...

make sense? This is just me btw... who knows if I am right or not LOL...

$.02

there's nothing wrong with what you said. especially since there is no real "right" or "wrong" answer. But the way you go about it is very strategic and seemgingly successful.

Not true. Lots of arranged marriages back in 'da day' that worked out fine... in fact there is less divorce in arranged marriages. Not condoning them, but saying that you "need" attraction is just something that some people blindly tell themselves. It's like the old saying "do you want to be right or do you want to be happy".....

i compeltely agree with that

arranged marriages are more like business contracts. Would you voluntarily be with someone that you aren't attracted to? Attraction is one aspect. Another are being attracted to the inside was as well.

Just as someone that doesn't have a good heart or not part of the mental attraction....wouldn't work. Dating someone based on looks alone rarely works.

saying you need to be attracted to someone was my opinion. If you have a different opinion....then that is what is right for you, not for me

Well, my motto is "if it ain't broke, don't fix it." I love the type of man I'm attracted to, he makes me happy, he excites the hell out of me, he gives me dirty thoughts all day and all night, I love looking at him, his voice is sexy and makes me weak, he's really smart and clever (I'm not into "funny" men, I think they're annoying), I look forward to talking to him all the time and it's never enough, I love obsessing over him. Why in god's name would I ever want to give that up just to say I made a change? No changes, not ever, not for me. But whatever works for everyone else, y'know?

for sure. I totally agree with you. I'm not saying change anything. Especially if you have found something that works for you...by all means, keep on keepin on. However, i'm saying if you have run out of idea, run out of things to try.... try the most obviously overlooked thing.... and again, i'm not sayin "types" are the dumbest thing to follow... I mean dang, I have my own... but it doesnt mean that itll always work out.

See, this is my whole problem. The type I'm attracted to became extinct around 1999.

Yes they are, and I suppose that not being in control is scary, but the facts speak for themselves and I was only pointing that out. When people "choose" based on attraction - the divorce rate is high. If "attraction' was so important to a good relationship, then that wouldn't be the case


LOL... yeah, in a perfect world people would be like this, but we both know that's not the case... What's the FIRST thing that most people do when they review a profile? They look at the pictures, and sometimes that's all they do... do you really think that those people are going to get married once and stay married? I don't... and the divorce rate among them backs that up...

I wasn't debating your 'opinion' - and I'd be the first one to defend your right to have one... I was debating the way you worded it... which was trying to make it sound like a 'fact'... which obviously it isn't. Attraction is not a 'need' - it's a 'want'...

perhaps consider there is less divorce in arranged marriages (if in fact this is true) - due to cultures that implement arranged marriages - are NOT tolerant of divorce... you assume all arranged married couples are blissfully happy - and do not have the problems (infidelity, abuse) that non-arranged marriages do...

$.02

I knew something epic happened that year, just wasn't sure what!

The way I word things doesn't seem to matter in forums any way I can clearly state it's my opinion and that doesn't matter to some lol....so I don't always say it's my opinion, since it doesn't seem to matter any way

There are people in arranged/unarranged marriages that are unhappy and happy. There are many reasons people don't separate or divorce. That is their choice.

There are many types out there....some might only like a certain color hair/eyes, race, religious/spiritual beliefs, height, etc.

I see nothing wrong with having a type. I date guys taller than me.

A relationship isn't a 'need' - it's a 'want.'