I have seen a man infrequently for three years, he lives 1,000 miles from me. He was married and had two children and was divorced six years ago. His youngest child is now 18. During his marriage he was a stay at home dad as he refers to it. He stayed home, took care of the kids, the home etc and his wife at that time worked. He has an excellent education and had worked prior to marriage. He told me that all he ever wanted to be was a stay at home dad.
Ok, I fine this odd. Certainly I have heard of this type of arrangement before but in todays world both parents work or the mother stays home for a given period of time and returns to work. (He did return to work after he was divorced).
What do you think of stay at home dads?? I need your input!!! I have never heard of a man aspiring to be a stay at home dad.

I don't date men with kids, so this will never be an issue for me. But if both people agree to it, I don't see anything wrong with a man staying at home for his children.

I was one and its what i wanted to do for a long time , i am from a HUGE very close family and have been taking care of kids as long as i can remember...When i was 17 to 19 i cared for 4 children from newborn to 8 from sun up to sun down.. their mother (my sister was sick) and their father was overseas (101st airborne.. This Was A full time job and was done in a show home that my sister had some arangement with the realtor where theyd randomly call and id have like an hour for the house to be Perfectly clean (we just kept it that way)...

So when my daughter came i was WAY more qualified to care for her than my ex who is an only child and only grandchild.. there are literally 6 people in her family (counting my daughter).. she knew nothing...With only one child to care for i couldnt stay busy enough to not go stir crazy so i work during the growing season.. and the only work i doo from fall to spring is various jobs i have interest in.. I have the ability to do ANYTHING ive ever tried and often do custom marble work or even rebuild a motor or paint a car for someone...I also kickboxed in tournaments for years so rule out the weak homemaker sissy stereotype

So i guess my opinion is forget stereotypes it seems in freeing themselves from sexism ALOT of modern women werent taught to be a homemaker more like a never rely on any man attitude.. In turn i was taught if i didnt learn to care for myself and my family no one would..I am a great cook and meticulous housekeeper

If it is a full time job taht keeps you busy its fair not to work..if you have too much free time work a little ... if your just lazy GET A DAMMN JOB BUM!! But if your single like me Do It all Learn to balance providing and caring and make sure you find time for homemade meals and quality time (somehow)...

and now chapter 2
LOL sorry so long

Thank-you for your answer, it provides so insight for me!! It sounds like you were very busy from a young age!!

My son's friend has a stay at home dad. When his friend was younger, he had a nanny, and both parents worked outside the home. Once the friend and his sister got older, the father began working from home. (No fool, him!)

Stay at home dads are not uncommon where I live. Some work from home; others take care of the business of home.

I think it depends on the family.The world is different from when I was growing up.The fathers always went to work.Put I just think now with the world so changed that what is best for the family all around is the best thing that counts.Specially for the children involved.

I think it's absolutely wonderful and would only be a problem if both parents wanted to be the stay at home parent. But, I wish all families could afford to have one parent stay home to take care of the children. Kudos to that father!

my son had a friend when he was younger where his friend dad raised his 2 kids and he was a stay at home dad. i did find out from my son friend that his dad was a minister..
they lived in his grandmother home untill she died and they sold that and bought another place and sold that and moved to nevada.

I wish I could be a stay at home dad. While I don't find the thought of it odd, I do find the thought of it AWESOME!!

Staying home and taking care of kids instead of working the sometimes hellish job I have? That's a no brainer if I could get away with it. Nobody says that you have to do anything with an education. I know Millionaires that never graduated from high school and I know people with higher education that deliver packages or work at electronic stores for a living.

lazy i tell ya......LAZY!

My mom did the stay at home thing, because dad made more money. Dad would have done it if mom made more. I know if it ever came up, I'd like to stay at home. I think it's awesome that one or the other parent wants to do it, and will do it well. It's the ones who claim to be stay at home's and do nothing around the place that bug me.

Im with you it irritates me when i see a "stay at home" mom or dad that doesnt contribute to the family.. love care and provide its pretty simple thats a family contribute or drag your "loved ones" down with your dead weight.. With men it sucks because i would love to be back in a work for my family in the home situation.. Some people just assume i am lazy and its because of othet lazy bastards that other hard working home dada get ridiculed..As for the lazy stay at home moms some women seem entitled to be do nothing trophies.. im not sure how that satisfies you as having a purpous in life but looks fade and your lazy approach may get you replaced with a younger model of lazy bit. or maybe a REAL woman that contibutes to the family in whatever way makes her feel whole //

I think it's really nice to see someone wanting to take care of their kids. A female or male!
Aslong as the child is actuallt getting looked after right , it doesn't matter.

I personally know of someone who's child got taken off them six years ago because of his records and the mother did no favours so the child ended up in fostercare.

Now he is totally cleaned up his act and all he wasn't is to be a "stay at home dad."

Another one of my friends does it too and e loves it!!

Well said!

Been raising my son on my own for the last 9 yrs... wouldn't trade it for the world.....

Bravo! Great to hear!

We always made it rough on dad when he had to go back to work, in between jobs. Both parents were very involved, at home and in the schools. I think it's a sad state off affairs that kids aren't getting that anymore.

Beautiful for him to embrace his family and step up to the huge and rewarding expereince of being the primary care giver for his children. kuddos to the guy, the world needs more men who are not afraid to break the ******** bonds of society that say men bring home the bacon. men can stay home and change nappies just as well:-) congrats to a stand-up father!

I have two feelings off the bat

1. It is interesting, I know women aspire to be stay at home moms and I sort of understand because of the bond formed in carrying a child and the nurturing that generally is required from the mom at the beginning of the childs life. I dont think there is quite that same INITIAL bond for a male,,,,however

2. Although this would not be 'my type' of guy, I find the quality in a man to be as endearing as in a woman. Just because the bond starts out different, doesnt mean a man cant have an affection for children which is healthy and admirable just as much as a woman can.
If he aspires to be there for his childrens emotional needs while his partner meets the financial, I see nothing particularly WRONG with that. The idea is that children have a balance of nurturing and provisions. I prefer the traditional role of the female being the primary nurturer and the male being the primary provider because I do embrace gender roles in a family,,but I think as long as the balance is there in SOME form(even if roles are reversed) than both parents have my respect.

I persopnally think it is best for kids to see both parents parent and both parents work. Work out side even unpaid or part time the home gives parents another place to focus their energy and not make the child every breath of the universe which I really don't think is good for parent or child.

I never liked to be refered to as a housewife and don't consider the term house husband any better. You are married to the spouse not the property or the kid. Kids are going to have a hard time taking wings and flying with a Mom or Dad who have made being a parent their whole life.

That said I don't care how much either work as long as they get along as a team and a partnership about how the jobs get divided up and done and the family is well cared for all around. Never thought martyer Mother's were a healthy thing and I wouldn't see that as a healthy thing for a Dad either.

I have always said some parents can be born with both hands tied behind their back and just be a natural at parenting and elevate homemaking/parenting to a true career even art form. Some seem to get the job done regardless of what obsticals come along and their kids are really blessed even though it is big shoes to fill.

For most though it takes both hands and usually it takes all they got to do a pretty decent job. Homemaking nor parenting is a job for sissies to be sure.

Sadsly some folks don't have a clue about home making or parenting and with all the help in the world or all the precision of skills it doesn't feel like home, life is choas, and the kids sometimes end up being more the parents than the parents.

My Radar goes off real fast when someone wants to withdraw form the world and be a stay hat home anything; includeing a parent. You can isolate yourself from the world and that is not really being a good parent because your kid only learns how to cope through modeling

I am not saying it can't be done because I retired early, owned a couple business', my home, vehicals ect out right and even take care of my extended family to some degree most of my life. Granted I started early working and played it smart balanceing my budget and saved to buy rather than finance most things almost all my adult life but I was also lucky a few times but not particularly on any grand scale. Maybe just too darn stubborn to see failure as and option. Maybe my luck was not having anyone but myself to pull me back up so I had to learn. But this old gal is tired and a lot of times the corners that got cut were on me. Not a lot of luxeries in my life past, present, or future.

But in all honesty I can't say I would not have some major reservatons until I saw the proof of the pudding to how a single parent could be a stay at home parent on only child support. Most the time child support just is NOT nearly enough to sustain any real quality of life no matter how you can squeeze the feathers off and eagle. I don't think people have the right to expect taxpayers to support them either.n Living off the parents, the state, or even your spouse is selling out to some degree. It is one thing if they are hurt or chronically ill but even that is not a lot if you didn't have a pretty substantial income to draw benifits from prior to being a parent.

I think I would be really concerned if they were doing anything illegal that could come back on you if you became a room-mate or spouse by common law or marriage. Unpaid taxes, living off the state, or the out-laws, or depending on gambeling can get real dicey fast when there is a second income to come after. I sure would not want to end up cleaning up someone elses messes. I have also seen how little some people value what they don't have to work for. I would take a real long hard look at things before I got myself into something that might be a lot harder to get out of. Anything that is as far away as you are talking about would be real risky to know the whole story.