If your partner is mentally, emotionally or physically abusive to you. Are you "ssooo in love" if you stay or are you just plain mentally unwell if you stay?

Mental abuse is making you feel inadequate at any level ie body size, mental capability, driving skills, cooking skills, mothering/fathering skills, etc....

Emotional abuse is playing with your emotions at any level ie trying to make you jealous, trying make you unsure of yourself in the relationship, loving you one minute and not the next, telling you they would treat you better if you were different at some level, etc...

Physical abuse is hurting you physically in any way.

So what do you think?

If you stay with them, do you need mental help?

i think that so many women chose to stay in an abusive relationship has more to do with the make up of women in general than a mental disorder. women are instinctively nurturers and the nurturing is not confined to their offspring. they nurture everything including relationships. they often think that they are capable of fixing anything. and just as often when they fail to fix an abusive relationship they blame themselves for failing in their efforts to fix and nurture the relationship. i'm no psychiatrist but i believe that's the approach one takes when dealing with a battered woman. the woman must first be made to understand that she's not to blame but is the victim. after all, the abusive baastard after saying he's sorry for putting her in intensive follows with, "but if you wouldn't keep pissing me off i wouldn't keep beating the crap out of you."

After watching and learning from other people's abusive marriage's I can honestly say NO..I would not stay in one. I choose single parenting over an abusive partner..

yeah,I believe those who stay need mental health care. If they don't need it going into the relationship, they need it after wards.

My last relationship was "mentally" abusive...on both mine and her end. We just nit picked everything about one another, looked at each others flaws and used them against each other. For a while, I couldn't figure out why we went down that road. But, my best guess now is that we just were both unhappy together that the longer we stayed together, the mental abuse got worse. We just brought out the worst in each other...as a couple. Now....as friends...we don't have this issue any longer. We are civil and we get along like we did when we met. I can honestly say that even though I care for her and like her, I would never get involved with her again. We are best suited as friends. We both learned our lesson.

something

"Emotional abuse is playing with your emotions at any level ie trying to make you jealous, trying make you unsure of yourself in the relationship, loving you one minute and not the next, telling you they would treat you better if you were different at some level, etc... "

so what you are saying is.... If they keep telling you how stupid you are, and then you stay.... they are right.. You are stupid!!

Thats like me saying Any gal that would stay with me is just STUPID!!

Any type of abuse (meaning the type an abuser can afford) is reflection of hatred. Hatred is the result of (1) lost love [It’s just gone away.] and (2) “obligation” to stay with the partner. [“I hate you so much for must see you 24/7. It is my psychological necessity to torture you. The more is your pain, the more psychological satisfaction I have. I will continue inventing new and more sophisticated tools of bring you in pain. Your physical death only will satisfy my hunger for your pain.”]

For the prey it’s extremely difficult to believe that the love we truly had is not here anymore. Mental paradigm shifts are difficult. Emotional map changes are almost impossible. [“Hard to believe… How could it happen…?” “I can’t believe it…”] However there is no other way, but to realize the reality we cannot change. The prey does not need psychiatrists or mental treatment. To keep sanity the victim needs willpower to stop beating the dead horse, move on, and be happy in the new reality. Double lucky those who realize how lucky they are in their new life. [“My past love had started joyfully and has finished happily.”]

What a lovely bunch of coconuts

Sounds familiar?

I dont think it necessarily means one needs mental help. It totally depends upon the situation and how much the individual can take. I know many people go through what seems like abusive behavior and they choose to go to counseling or seek God, or some other therapy to work through it. Those who do this successfully come out stronger. That being said, there are also those that dont want to change or get help and their partner needs to recognize this and RUN the other way.

When does nurturing become co-dependency and/or a mental issue though?

I like this anwer though, it shows you appreciate how women are.

Good that you figured it out. Sounds like a horrible way to live.

I believe just some self esteem work would be really helpful, don't you?

Might not agree fully but I appreciate your view.

Who? Where? LOL

Get the hell out of any relationship where your partner is mentally or physically abusive, it can scar you for life!

How much the individual can take???? Why should anyone be "taking" anything?

If they choose to go to couseling/therapy or even seek a religious avenue then they need mental health support of some kind. So you agree with the fact that they need help or they need to run.

I agree.

If he's a jerk, I leave. End of story.