then why do you need to wait for some one else to take the first eye? if not for preventative measures then surely it must be of a pleasurable motive.

i don't understand...

forgiveness is bullcrap. a person asks for forgiveness selfishly. forgiveness only benifits the offender. it lets him off the hook in a sense for his wrong doing which often lessens the harmful impact in his mind that his offense has caused the victim. when someone says they are sorry to me i thank them for the appology and acknowledge his/her courage in admitting the mistake. then i let them know if it doesn't happen again we'll have no further problem.

when thinking about forgiveness i cannot help but think about the wife beater who keeps asking and receiving forgiveness from his wife and continues the beating. when he finally puts her in intensive care and gets hauled to jail he says, "well if she'd quit pissing me off i wouldn't beat her". forgiving sucks. consequences matter.

Is forgiveness bull crap for those of us who offer it without being asked?

just because one claim to forgive someone doesn't mean that the person in question need, want or require your forgiveness ...the person may even feel that they have done nothing to be forgiven for

if forgiveness is anything it's a form of therapy to help someone deal with a given situation by placing themselves into a positon of power to absolve the person that supposedly done them wrong of their supposed sins

there is no need to forgive because to do so takes power from you and give it to the person in question ...if anything consider the incident to be knowledge and not allow it to continuously cause a negative impact upon your psyche

To forgive, does not take any power from me, it relinquishes me from the negative emotional consequence of the offense. Forgiveness is not for my offender, but for me.

maybe worse. offer it without the perpetrator asking and you diminish the consequences of his offence even further. further remove the deterance for a repeat offence. he/she simply doesn't feel as bad for what he's done to you. he's even rewarded by removing the need to humble himself and ask forgiveness. his humiliating shame is lessened.

what is forgiveness if not a pardon? a crime against my moral compass is no less a crime than a crime against society's laws. it's more and more common in america that people come to the realization that there are few consequences for their actions whether it be illegal immigration, teen pregnancy, date rape, spousal abuse, insulting friends or whatever. i cannot help but think that this lack of appreciation for concequences for commiting harm to others doesn't begin with having continuously been forgiven from an early age.

Forgiveness does not absolve anyone of consequence. An offender may not even know that he was forgiven. Forgiveness happens inside the person who is offended.It absolves them of the stressful consequences of hate and blame. I can FORGIVE a repeat adulterer and still BREAK off the relationship as a consequence of the offense. Forgiveness does not exclude consequence. It is merely an emotion to help heal the offended.

if you have to "give" then that is an indication that it "takes" away .....only because of the actions of the offender would you have the need to forgive ...this means that the offender already has some power over you....and to then forgive is to relinquish the offender more power

i understand how you see it. we simply see it differently. forgiveness works for you. doesn't work for me.

Or perhaps forGIVEness, GIVES me back the power that was taken when I was offended,,,,,,wordplay that could go on for pages. The above post states it best, it works for me,,doesnt have to work for everyone.

not really...because it is you that has this need to give...the offender simply may not care...it becomes your obsession

not really an obsession, a pretty simple and quick action followed by me moving on with my life.

as I said at first..it's therapy

forgive us trespasses

as we forgive those who trespass against us



and then beat the crap out of em

consequences.

it's kinda like the condemned muderer

you forgive him

but you still execute him

forgive him if that's what blows your skirt up. not me.

well that's what you're suppose to do

very few of us (actually none) are "good" christians

in reality its pretty difficult

if you loan someone $20 and they never pay it back, you're suppose to forgive it and give it to them freely

but in reality we go find em and beat the crap out of em and get our money back

that means that the governor didn't forgive him