sorry you had to deal with that..make sure you DONT go back...it
WILL happen again regardless of what he says...you deserve better!

I know it. I even told him that I do know that in his calm conscious state he'd never hurt me, but he flies off the handle and gets down right insane in a way most people can't imagine and probably would call me a drama queen. He even has me thinking I'm overreacting when in the calm light of day I do know I did the right thing.

if a woman slaps a man then its not right but its not a big deal

if a woman beats a man as she is nuts, then thats not okay

if a man slaps a woman who was being crazy, then its a massive miss judged mistake. but not realy a sign of bad character on the guy

if a man is getting phisicly angry around a woman, his family or even his male friends, then he needs to "man up" and endever to solve his controll issue.

if a man puts his hands round YOUR throat..... i cant finish this sentance without swearing, but he will never change and i suggest you go to his house and shoot him

Jamie,

Hopefully you will find good support here.

Sorry this happen to you. I am sure you know this is not a unique experience. Not even that it has happen before. Unfortuneately being a victim doesn't sheild you from someone else making you a victim again. One does compound the other.

Makes sense it had to scare you. Hopefully you are getting couseling to deal with the stress. Learn how to calm yourself when you feel frightened or upset about it. THere are some really good techniques that work.

Know you feel really bad about the toddler but you will have many chances to parent and probably now you even have sympathy for the Mother but you still need to end contact with the child. Hopefully you reported this to child protective services because a child seeing this, living with, this kind of violence is abusive to him and his developement. He could get hurt just as a bystander. This parent should only have supervised visitation.

This person is not a nice guy that just looses his temper. It is likely that he has a long history of tantrums and it is pretty obvious he has done nothing to learn how to control it. And he won't. He may play at it to stay out of prision but it is not a problem to him and he is not going to change as long as he can pacify or intimidate the people he abuses. And he will keep doing it wheather it is you or someone else. I would not be surprised if he hasn't already picked your replacement. Sadly he will probably find several before he is stopped.

You did the absolute right thing getting in school. I hope you have availed yourself to all the resources on your campus. If you talk to the Special Student Services Co-ordinator that person can be a great help to you. Also talking with the on campus police so they know you have been assaulted and keep him off campus. Financial services should be able to help you get scholarships but until you have them in hand I would streach what you have absolutely as far as you can.

I've been there before so I know how it feels. My ex pushed me to the ground several times, kicked me in my back, hit me in my mouth, making it bleed, ripped clothes and jewelry off my body, etc. I always tried to leave him but he would apologize and i would always take him back because i loved him and believed he wouldnt do it again...until one day when he had me choked out against the wall. needless to say that was all it took for me to be done with him for good (even though it was very hard to get rid of him still).i know how hard it is to leave but u did the right thing! don't be sad and miss all the good things about your relationship. you need to focus on what was bad and wrong with it and it will help u be stronger and move on. u deserve better than to be with someone who treats you like that. I always say i would rather be single and happy than with someone and unhappy!

welcome back

you are a very strong woman to have gone through such an ordeal and even stronger to have removed yourself from any dangerous situations.

here's to you!!! Jayme

I do know that usually when a girl says a guy abused her she winds up going back, but I've left before and didn't go back and its gonna be the same this time. I don't revisit the past, once I leave someone thats it. I really do appreciate all of your kind words, my friends have been amazing but sometimes they say everything I don't need to hear to try to make me feel better and it doesn't work...lol

I'm glad that you are safe now. It sounds like you have alot of thinking to do. Remember the bad or exciting traits of the men who abused you. Make a point to not be involved with that that type of person again. It might sound easier said than done, but it's all about balancing your heart with your head.

good luck

The problem with that is they're different types of men. I've now had 2 definite abusive relationships, along with a handful that were headed there... as in grabbing me in anger and all that (they got kicked to the curb immediately too). They have all been completely different. You got the guys who are seemingly brutally honest with themselves only to realize they actually just beat themselves up over every mistake, therefore they do the same to you. Thats not to feel sorry for them, they should get that in check before they attempt a relationship. You got the guy who seems to have no flaws and treats you like a princess only for them to turn into abusive pricks the second they get you where they want you. I never date the same 'type' twice in a row. When something goes wrong with one guy, the next time I look for one who is different from them. I've actually dated a few really good guys, but they didn't fall for me and weren't going to. The few really good ones who liked me, I didn't feel anything for. There's only been once that a guy loved me the way I loved him and we had a mutual respect for each other. It didn't work b/c we were too young, but its to date the healthiest relationship I've ever had. I have been trying to get a hold of him to find out what mistakes I made in THAT relationship so that I don't repeat them in the future.