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| Topic: Too good to be true,,, | |
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Is it weird to require a person to have flaws...lol I mean if you meet someone that just seems to good to be true,,do you chalk it up to intuition and protect yourself from being disappointed? What do you think? Are there people who seem too good to be true, but are actually the real deal? I've yet to meet said person ... 
Isn't it just an urban myth, folk tale??? |
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In my opinion, everyone has flaws and if they don't...they are lying thru their teeth. But....what if they ain't GOT no teef? 
 
Hehehehe they could gum their way through.......... |
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you cant always get what you want yours truely DEATHSPEAKER
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you cant always get what you want yours truely DEATHSPEAKER I CAN 
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Ohhhhhhhhhhh heck I'm not looking for perfect for I'm far from it....... just looking for someone that fits perfect with my imperfections.........
 
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you cant always get what you want yours truely DEATHSPEAKER But if you try some times You just might find You get what you need Yours Truly,The Rolling Stones  
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Is it weird to require a person to have flaws...lol I mean if you meet someone that just seems to good to be true,,do you chalk it up to intuition and protect yourself from being disappointed? What do you think? Are there people who seem too good to be true, but are actually the real deal? No, requiring that a new significant other have flaws is to have the luxury of controlling them with these flaws later. Say for instance an airbrushed, supermodel type gets involved with a guy who may be substantially older, overweight, balding, or any combination of the above, for the purpose of using him as a tool. By berating him later for any or all of these flaws incessantly, it is possible to beat the guys' self-esteem to a pulp so low that he is a virtual emotional slave to her. This could be perpetrated upon anyone, in an kind of relationship...a woman controlling a man, a man controlling a woman, gay, straight, lesbian, dogs and cats, whatever. ...and it's diabolical. Stranger still, the perpetrator of this can do this subconsciously, possessing a deep-seated need to control, the consummate "control freak".
I was subject to the conniving manipulations of just such a person not long ago. She wanted me to move in with her, be her rent-paying roommate, lover/boyfriend, etc. However, she was in her jacuzzi one night beneath her bedroom window mouthing off about me, and I heard her say some incriminating things. 
She was also a nurse, having been trained in the gentle art of manipulating patients for their own good. However, this knowledge can be wielded for selfish purposes, and was, in our case. Much to her chagrin, I escaped. 
The beotch... 
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Is it weird to require a person to have flaws...lol I mean if you meet someone that just seems to good to be true,,do you chalk it up to intuition and protect yourself from being disappointed? What do you think? Are there people who seem too good to be true, but are actually the real deal? No, requiring that a new significant other have flaws is to have the luxury of controlling them with these flaws later. Say for instance an airbrushed, supermodel type gets involved with a guy who may be substantially older, overweight, balding, or any combination of the above, for the purpose of using him as a tool. By berating him later for any or all of these flaws incessantly, it is possible to beat the guys' self-esteem to a pulp so low that he is a virtual emotional slave to her. This could be perpetrated upon anyone, in an kind of relationship...a woman controlling a man, a man controlling a woman, gay, straight, lesbian, dogs and cats, whatever. ...and it's diabolical. Stranger still, the perpetrator of this can do this subconsciously, possessing a deep-seated need to control, the consummate "control freak".
I was subject to the conniving manipulations of just such a person not long ago. She wanted me to move in with her, be her rent-paying roommate, lover/boyfriend, etc. However, she was in her jacuzzi one night beneath her bedroom window mouthing off about me, and I heard her say some incriminating things.
She was also a nurse, having been trained in the gentle art of manipulating patients for their own good. However, this knowledge can be wielded for selfish purposes, and was, in our case. Much to her chagrin, I escaped.
The beotch...
my previous marriage was very much the same; what was I to do. I took those learned lessons and turned them around on her. She didn't like it when the pupil surpassed the teacher. I found it funny and rewarding. I got the kids and she got the boot. |
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"When someone show you who they really are - BELIEVE THEM!!!"
~Maya Angelou |
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Is it weird to require a person to have flaws...lol I mean if you meet someone that just seems to good to be true,,do you chalk it up to intuition and protect yourself from being disappointed? What do you think? Are there people who seem too good to be true, but are actually the real deal? No, requiring that a new significant other have flaws is to have the luxury of controlling them with these flaws later. Say for instance an airbrushed, supermodel type gets involved with a guy who may be substantially older, overweight, balding, or any combination of the above, for the purpose of using him as a tool. By berating him later for any or all of these flaws incessantly, it is possible to beat the guys' self-esteem to a pulp so low that he is a virtual emotional slave to her. This could be perpetrated upon anyone, in an kind of relationship...a woman controlling a man, a man controlling a woman, gay, straight, lesbian, dogs and cats, whatever. ...and it's diabolical. Stranger still, the perpetrator of this can do this subconsciously, possessing a deep-seated need to control, the consummate "control freak".
I was subject to the conniving manipulations of just such a person not long ago. She wanted me to move in with her, be her rent-paying roommate, lover/boyfriend, etc. However, she was in her jacuzzi one night beneath her bedroom window mouthing off about me, and I heard her say some incriminating things.
She was also a nurse, having been trained in the gentle art of manipulating patients for their own good. However, this knowledge can be wielded for selfish purposes, and was, in our case. Much to her chagrin, I escaped.
The beotch...
my previous marriage was very much the same; what was I to do. I took those learned lessons and turned them around on her. She didn't like it when the pupil surpassed the teacher. I found it funny and rewarding. I got the kids and she got the boot. YAY!  GOOD FOR YOU, MAN! These days, men are expected to just bend over, while their wife/gf positions herself behind them with a strap-on... (and I suppose you realize we've already been pegged as chauvinists, wife-beaters, etc., for even discussing this)
...and then it's all swept under the rug. 
The strange thing is, this same KIND of woman has a "drive" (NPI-"no pun intended") to dominate her man in just such a fashion, then will wonder where all the good men are!
By her behavior, she will leave her man with only two choices: either take it up the ole pooper, or leave. 
Truly, "you have to shake the whole tree to find one good apple" all too often.  This is often why men who date a lot before marrying (if they ever DO get married, a 'la George Clooney)are seen as shallow. This is way off base.
I've learned to view a new relationship like walking a car lot. Sorry, but it's just a great analogy. 
Always be ready to walk away. Allow time for the "glass mask" to fall to the floor and shatter. If there is indeed a "screw loose" somewhere in her head, or she has a hidden agenda, she'll betray this by trying to rush you into things, as my aforementioned "friend" did by insisting I move in with her. She DID NOT want to allow time for her "glass mask" to fall and shatter. Too bad. But when she turns out to be SANE, honest, and understanding, love her like each day is your last together. 
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Edited by
trublu4u
on
Sat 09/19/09 07:29 AM
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 Is it weird to require a person to have flaws...lol I mean if you meet someone that just seems to good to be true,,do you chalk it up to intuition and protect yourself from being disappointed? What do you think? Are there people who seem too good to be true, but are actually the real deal? No, requiring that a new significant other have flaws is to have the luxury of controlling them with these flaws later. Say for instance an airbrushed, supermodel type gets involved with a guy who may be substantially older, overweight, balding, or any combination of the above, for the purpose of using him as a tool. By berating him later for any or all of these flaws incessantly, it is possible to beat the guys' self-esteem to a pulp so low that he is a virtual emotional slave to her. This could be perpetrated upon anyone, in an kind of relationship...a woman controlling a man, a man controlling a woman, gay, straight, lesbian, dogs and cats, whatever. ...and it's diabolical. Stranger still, the perpetrator of this can do this subconsciously, possessing a deep-seated need to control, the consummate "control freak".
I was subject to the conniving manipulations of just such a person not long ago. She wanted me to move in with her, be her rent-paying roommate, lover/boyfriend, etc. However, she was in her jacuzzi one night beneath her bedroom window mouthing off about me, and I heard her say some incriminating things.
She was also a nurse, having been trained in the gentle art of manipulating patients for their own good. However, this knowledge can be wielded for selfish purposes, and was, in our case. Much to her chagrin, I escaped.
The beotch...
my previous marriage was very much the same; what was I to do. I took those learned lessons and turned them around on her. She didn't like it when the pupil surpassed the teacher. I found it funny and rewarding. I got the kids and she got the boot. YAY! GOOD FOR YOU, MAN! These days, men are expected to just bend over, while their wife/gf positions herself behind them with a strap-on... (and I suppose you realize we've already been pegged as chauvinists, wife-beaters, etc., for even discussing this)
...and then it's all swept under the rug. (DOUBLE POST!)
The strange thing is, this same KIND of woman has a "drive" (NPI-"no pun intended") to dominate her man in just such a fashion, then will wonder where all the good men are!
By her behavior, she will leave her man with only two choices: either take it up the ole pooper, or leave.
Truly, "you have to shake the whole tree to find one good apple" all too often. This is often why men who date a lot before marrying (if they ever DO get married, a 'la George Clooney)are seen as shallow. This is way off base.
I've learned to view a new relationship like walking a car lot. Sorry, but it's just a great analogy.
Always be ready to walk away. Allow time for the "glass mask" to fall to the floor and shatter. If there is indeed a "screw loose" somewhere in her head, or she has a hidden agenda, she'll betray this by trying to rush you into things, as my aforementioned "friend" did by insisting I move in with her. She DID NOT want to allow time for her "glass mask" to fall and shatter. Too bad. But when she turns out to be SANE, honest, and understanding, love her like each day is your last together.
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you cant always get what you want yours truely DEATHSPEAKER But if you try some times You just might find You get what you need Yours Truly,The Rolling Stones
If everybody followed this wisdom, there would be no need for mingle2!
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Is it weird to require a person to have flaws...lol I mean if you meet someone that just seems to good to be true,,do you chalk it up to intuition and protect yourself from being disappointed? What do you think? Are there people who seem too good to be true, but are actually the real deal? What I think happens in the first six months is called lust blindness. All the emotions and hormones involved in this new relationship blind us to ignore possible subtle signs that all is not perfect. Think back to someone that you thought was "the one". If you look back clearly, at some point, there were small signs that we choose to ignore. Let's say our hormones get the best of us. |
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Is it weird to require a person to have flaws...lol I mean if you meet someone that just seems to good to be true,,do you chalk it up to intuition and protect yourself from being disappointed? What do you think? Are there people who seem too good to be true, but are actually the real deal? What I think happens in the first six months is called lust blindness. All the emotions and hormones involved in this new relationship blind us to ignore possible subtle signs that all is not perfect. Think back to someone that you thought was "the one". If you look back clearly, at some point, there were small signs that we choose to ignore. Let's say our hormones get the best of us. Exactly! You're very wise. We tend to ignore these signs because we've neglected the health of our LIVES. We have discontinued dating, because that "perfect one" hasn't yet come along. So, when someone does come along who INITIALLY "rings our bell", we just sometimes latch on. Very unwise, and sometimes downright dangerous. Kudos to you. |
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Is it weird to require a person to have flaws...lol I mean if you meet someone that just seems to good to be true,,do you chalk it up to intuition and protect yourself from being disappointed? What do you think? Are there people who seem too good to be true, but are actually the real deal? when I first met papersmile I thought she was too good to be true and then when she was bad I knew couldn't let her get away |
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NO, when they seem too good to be true, they are.. IMO thats just a phrase to say... something is amiss, and BS.
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Is it weird to require a person to have flaws...lol I mean if you meet someone that just seems to good to be true,,do you chalk it up to intuition and protect yourself from being disappointed? What do you think? Are there people who seem too good to be true, but are actually the real deal? I've yet to meet said person ...
Isn't it just an urban myth, folk tale??? Thought I may have just met him on mingle,,,go figure,,,guess he wasnt feeling the same,,, |
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Edited by
trublu4u
on
Sat 09/19/09 06:42 PM
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Giving someone you just met a "chance" to prove themselves is no different from tossing care to the wind and latching onto them. So why not go the safer route, the one that requires some discipline of ones' feelings?
IMHO, the best way to give TIME a chance to evaluate a persons' character and their motives is to keep communication lines open with others. Also, never let a new significant other dominate your time and attention to the point where you neglect your friends. From their vantage point, they may notice things about your new s/o that you don't, or WON'T.
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