"Just" is my way of viewing it. Not saying it's wrong...just saying it's wrong for me.


thank you for clarifying .

Well, provided you can find someone who's worth making that sort of effort, then I suppose you'd have some motivation. But there is also a question of available resources....some of us are just not in a position to go there.



It's definitely a diverse group of people, in many ways. In the ways that really matter to me -- i.e., situationally, the whole concept of expectations and what they're "looking for" (either nominally or in actuality) -- there's virtually no diversity at all.

I tend to see this more as a logistical denouement more than anything -- in that it seems as if people tend not to think about trying dating sites until they're already at a point in their lives where certain belief systems/expectations are written in stone and cannot be altered....

I would take another approach, but like I've already said...I don't have a problem getting dates, and I don't tend to have a problem keeping ahold of said person (not always true, but people tend to think I'm not really who I am online...which I am...). There is no problem in that at all, my problem is that I can't find someone I would actually enjoy spending a lot of time with, and like I also said...this is all subject to change. My point in this thread is why don't people look at themselves or even just decide to be happy alone? I am an awesome person, and all of my voices agree...though they tend to argue like children about it.

I think personally that you have to be happy alone and with yourself before you can move onto a relationship, some people rush that process and I've fallen into a few of their paths. There was of course interest in the person, but that quickly fades after the person shows who they really are instead of who you thought they were...which I guess comes down to honesty. I just think people should enjoy themselves either alone or out with some friends, then after that step maybe move onto a relationship. I'm past that step and am okay with not being in a relationship at this point in time.

Also, eHarmony couldn't match me...I'm starting to think their math is flawed, one in ten doesn't really make a lot of sense seeing as all the people I've come across couldn't be matched through them either.

right now im not working and prying i dont end up in the hospital again plus after my string of bad relationships i just want to be single and work on me

but the more i stay single the more i like it.i like not having to worry if the other person is cheating or he just wants in my pants b.c more then likely he does.

so i just done date.im having being just friends with my guy friends

See, that's another stigma attached to dating that I see quite often. There is always the constant thought of "he/she just wants to get in my pants" and yes, it does happen to guys a lot as well. We just tend to get laughed at when we bring it up because that is all "men" want out of a relationship. Which is a stigma drawn over both sexes, one constantly thinking the other just wants to get in their pants...and the other hoping that isn't what they are thinking.

Relationships require a lot of communication, and I think this is where they fail. This generation has grown up under the guise of having a pill for everything, we are sad we take a pill, we are too happy we take a pill. We don't need to communicate with anyone but the doctor. Now I do understand this isn't always the case, but I think for the most part it is. We are a co-dependent generation, we need something at all times whether it be the screwed up abusive boyfriend...or the pink pill.

They told me that 20% of the people who take the 29-point matching personality profile thing are unmatchable.

Having done some research on the site and its founder (and having noticed how prominent the word "Faith" is in some of their advertising), I have to believe that one's religious orientation (or lack thereof) may play a part in their assessment of one's matchableness.

"Relationships require a lot of communication, and I think this is where they fail"and i agree with that totally i want a guy who completely in love with me and not b.c ive got nice hooters or a nice ***.and i dont believe sex is the answer to fix a problem.if i cant have an intelligent conversation with somebody about the world im interested in being with a dumb *** or a lazy bum.and i run into girl who think they constantly have to have a boyfriend or they are a loser if they are not dating.and thats not the case for me id rather be single then feel like i have to have somebody or something to be complete

that's weird.

I do find it a little strange, because we're seeing so many new, more specialized, sites popping up all the time.

eHarmony, on the other hand, seems to think the payoff is better if they masquerade as a "general" site while actually functioning as a religion-specific site. It strikes me as a little misleading. Not to mention a big waste of time (how long did it take me to fill out that 29-point matching thing, anyway?) for people like me.

They told you 20%? I was told one in ten, either way the math is flawed I think. Two out of ten? Considering in this thread alone there is what? Five? On top of the number of every person I've talked to can't be matched through them. From different faiths as well, most agnostic/atheist though.

Yeah, after I completed the thing, they sent me the results. This was back in 2006, so I don't remember the exact language, but they definitely said 20% of all those who participated were unmatchable.

They clearly have no use for agnostic/atheist types, which I'm sure is why I was relegated to the scrap heap....

Maybe we should make up our own God.

Works for me. I'm sure we can come up with something more interesting than all those blah gods they're using now....!!

I was thinking we should put you up there, but I don't know if you are narcissistic enough for the position.

You are so hard about love and one day everything that you think you stand for is gonna hit you in the face there is love for you i have talked with you and know past what you show is an amazing man that one female will break through to you and i hope i am there to be there for that and i will sit on my porch and raise a glass and smile and my heart will be happy that day because all that you have been through love has found you and i will know my friend has found the one who respects and loves the true man that you are

Maybe one day that will happen, I was in love once...I screwed that one up, although the feeling wasn't mutual in the first place it could have been had I not screwed it up. I just get bored quickly, and for whatever reason, either I or something else screws it up. Usually something else, but I have terrible luck at anything.

I know exactly what you mean.. If what you've been doing isn't working for you, rather than try, try again... try something new, different

Like yourself. I can't date because I'm not stable at this point in time, but I don't mind because I am comfortable with myself. It can change, but it isn't changing anytime soon...I'm happy.

I am, but I can think of some more deserving candidates....!