I want to tell my friend so bad that her boyfriend is a complete and udder douche. But at the same time I do not want to be the one to tell her. Because then I will end up being the friend that she feels like she cannot turn to when she has a problem.

I was there Sunday after noon until late last night. And the whole time I had to listen to his no-it-all attitude. Everything he says is right he is never wrong and is now about to cost my friend a bunch of money that I know she does not have. Her computer was messing up on her and I knew it was a simple fix. Something I could of had done in like 20 minutes. He sat on the computer for almost 2 hours doing who knows what to it. Not allowing me anywhere near it. Two hours of him working on it did not fix. I even offered him suggestions to how to fix it, and he would not listen to me at all. ended with him shutting the computer down and him telling my friend, a single mother with no job that she has to take her computer in and that it was unusable. Now she thinks she has to spend all this money to have it repaired. She has an Autistic son who's one quirck is the computer.

This is just one example. I cannot see somebody that I care about live like this. I am just not sure, should I tell her how I feel, or should I just sit back. But sitting back and watching my best and dearest friend is not something I think I can do.

Any suggestions at all?

Walk away....she wont listen to you anyways.

If you can fix it, fix it for her...then bury her boyfriend under my stoop...I need another one for my collection...

homicide

See that is what I wanted to do yesterday was fix it. But the moment I sat infront of the thing he was like No leave it. We had a huge argument over it. I did not want the stress on my friend so I just walked away from it.

i don't see the problem. i'd just tell my friend i think her boyfriend is a prick.

I just dug up a new plot, what? About six foot by three feet? That's good, right?

Honestly, ask her if she wants you to try, don't listen to him...he says something stupid, ignore him. If your friend doesn't want you to fix it, then don't bother.

If she think's it's broken how are you going to "make it worse". Surely she'd rather let you, her friend, look at it, than pay a boatload of dough she does not have to repair a problem that does not exist.

A nice start would be to offer to "have her computer fixed" then just fix it. It will save her some money and reinforce your friendship. You can't stop people from dating jerks.

yah me too

I just dont have the kind of manners that keep me from telling someone when they are being a dumbass

I mean they may not realize that they are a dumbass and its our Christian duty to inform them

tell you friend to get a spine! Fix the computer, call her BF a douch in his face. If she gets mad? Tell her wisdom comes at a high price and that your friendship may be part of the cost if she does not pull her head out of her ***.


Then again you can sit back and tell her "I told you so" after the fact.

Well she did tell me that she would like me to look at it when he is not around. But the thing is he is ALWAYS around. So in reality I can see him getting her to take it in before I even get a chance to look at it. She stopped the argument yesterday by saying that she did not want to see her best friend and boyfriend arguing. I have already told myself as long as he is in her place I am not going over at all. I am there to visit my friend not some ******* that thinks he is better then anybody else.

Love is blind. If that is all she is seeing then reality is that telling her something like that would like I said make her feel that she cannot come to me.

Try getting her a lovely new vibrator. Then the prick can be put away in a drawer when not being used.

what would make ME not want to go to a friend is if i felt she is not being honest with me. i like honesty in my close friendships, both ways.

I'd stay out of it, the best way to ruin a friendship is over a guy/girl that the other person is into. And the bad thing is, once they make up, you're the bad guy. I'd let her know that I'm there for her, but as for telling her the guy is a jerk, either she already knows that and doesn't care, or she'll think you're being a b!tch for saying that.

Never said that she was NOT being honest with me. I have known her like 16 years. Honesty is something that I know we have.

And see that is how I see as well. Thank you. It is just so hard to sit and watch.

you misunderstand.

i was speaking there from the point of view of the friend with a prick of a boyfriend. i'm just saying, if i were in her position i would treasure honesty from my friends. if i can't trust them to be blunt with me, who else could i trust?

I would speak my mind (bu wouldn't shove it down her throat)
Then she will know where you stand and how you feel. and at least you tried to warn her, but the rest is up to her. all you can do is do what YOU need to do for yourself