And one more thing...life gets better as you get older so be patient...we ALL learn from our mistakes. And YES we all make mistakes. My best to you...if you ever need to talk just email me...I will listen.

i know and thanks..

I wish you the best with your difficult decision. I raised my child by myself. When they get older, it does get easier.

thanks i just dont want to do it by myself i already am with my two yr old and her dad dont help and this one i am carring noone is the daddy i told him he told me that my problem not his ..

You might want to look into that leagally...it IS his problem too!

He said it was your problem and not his but the courts see it differently when it comes time for child support.

Btw, I have seen my relatives have children close together. There is a good thing called hand-me-downs with clothes, toys, and beds. (If you kept it.)

My heart goes out to you and this difficult decision.

BIRTH CONTROL. !!!

ESP if your single!!!

Jmo

im not judging you in any way, would you keep the baby if you were in a relationship?

yeah i would it hard though to raise two by yourself

You really do need to talk to the people close to you and not strangers about this.

And I apologize but drinking is no excuse for anyone's actions especially if it affects someone else.

Thats all I was trying to say....

First off I want to commend you for having this baby in a world where many in your position are pressured to abort, not realizing the trauma that it can bring later (as I've seen in my mother). You are doing the right thing, and years from now regardless of what happens to this baby, you can always take solace in the fact you gave it a chance to live.

Second, so as to not be put into this position again in your future, you may want to consider abstaining from sex until at the least you are sure you will be able to care for another child. As you know it only takes one time, one failed birth control method for you to become pregnant. As an addition to that you would also be wise to keep yourself out of situations and places where you feel you may be compromised in this area.

Good luck to you, and as I said before you are doing the right thing. Take care of yourself, if you ever need someone to talk to about this, feel free to send a message.

well thank you

You are very welcome. (hugs)

First of all, as I told someone else a few days ago, when you make a post on a public forum and then ask for opinions or advice, you are putting yourself out there and allowing yourself to be insulted, ridiculed, judged, looked down upon and more. If you don't want people to give their honest opinions, you shouldn't ask for them. I am not being mean, I am being honest. I don't ask people on here for their opinions about anything I do or plan to do, and if they give them and I don't want them, I deal with that appropriately.

I never, ever ask for opinions about subjects that are personal to me, because I'm pretty sure I won't like the answer. Some people believe in abortion, some people believe in adoption, some people believe it's best to keep their child, no matter the situation and do the best they can to raise it. Those are personal choices, and only the person who is in that situation knows what is best for them. I have no idea what you are going through; I have never been pregnant, and I never plan to become pregnant, so I'd never say "oh you should do this because-" or "you're wrong to feel this way because-" I think people who do that are full of crap. Until something like this happens to you, you don't get it. So I won't pretend that I do.

Secondly, the unborn child's father is a jerk, pure and simple. You didn't get yourself pregnant on your own, so yeah, it's his fault too. I'd be on the phone to the proper authorities about child support and anything else you might need as soon as possible if I were you. I get so sick of men sitting around whining about not wanting to pay child support and how "she" ruined his life. That's crap, too. I tell them if they don't want a kid, use protection or get a freaking vasectomy- yeah, I'm sure it "lessens the feeling" but so does an unwanted, unplanned pregnancy, and most of the time, if you force a father to be around a child he never wanted, the child ends up being abused.

Thirdly, take it from someone who does know this- do not drink around men. Never! You lose your inhibitions and you do things you probably wouldn't do sober. It is a bad bad bad idea. If you have to drink something around a guy, have a soda, have some juice, but do not drink alcohol.

Fourthly, do what you think YOU can live with, this is your life; it's not about what we think, your parents think, the child's father thinks, it's about you. It sounds like you have decided that giving the child up for adoption will be the best thing for you, it, and your other child. That is up to you. Only you know what's best. I commend you on making your own decision. It shows character.

Lastly, don't let other people make you feel bad about what you've done; learn from your mistakes and victories and move on. Be a good mother to your current child and your future children if you plan to have any.

Good luck.

well thank you i was going to delete it but i dont know how on here

The reason you posted your request was so you could hear from complete strangers what they think you should do. Since you seem to be ok with that, my advice to you is to locate someone who is trained to listen to your specific situation and guide you to the right choice. Some suggestions would include a medical professional if you can afford it / have insurance. If not, a good place (and maybe even better place)is to find a church that is accepting of all, (many non-denominational churches exist now and don't judge you or look down upon you for much of anything). These places often have amazing programs for many different problems and can help you learn more facts and make wise decisions. They may not have medical certification all the time, but they are usually people who have been in the same situations so understand really well. They can also help your spirit grow so that you feel better about yourself and can learn to control what you consider your "bad decisions."
In addition, It is my own personal opinion that people make mistakes. People are not mistakes. Babies are just undeveloped people. Help them develop to be the best they can. The decision is ultimately yours and you will be in my prayers to be granted the wisdom to do what is right for the baby.

Unfortunately, we can't delete posts on here. We can edit them for a certain amount of time, but after that, it's permanent. Don't worry about it, it'll scroll off eventually.