notice how you put in attractive? now you've just moved from being the "nice guy" to the "superficial guy" who's into women for looks. why not go for an unattractive woman, or even one who's not necessarily unattractive, but just regular looking? she might be looking for a guy like you.

legal's legal. but yeah, it'd be a little weird i think.


. . .

im a possitive guy. finding a date isnt dificult. its more about how you can keep the momentum going, ese.

Yes, for sure...

so an attractive girl wouldn't be looking for a guy like me?

when i say attractive i mean a girl that i find attractive. my tastes don't always coincide with the rest of the population.



. . .

I knew what you meant.. I think that so many are looking for the unattainable beauty/handsomeness that it's just the common thought when it's worded that way...

That brings back memories. It's not so pleasant as it seems like..dust and bugs and the hay can scratch you all over.

now you're being paranoid, i don't know anything about you, beyond what you've said on here. from what i'm told from men about unattractive women, they come close to being the female version of the nice guy. therefore you might have a chance with her, since you describe yourself as one. that's what i meant by "someone like you"

try not to be so sensitive, all women aren't b!tches out to insult you, that's just your insecurity.

Something like " The Butt Ugly, Only Kinda Nice Dudes Thread "????

And that statement gets right back to the heart of the problem.

The people who are looking for " Perfect for " them, want the charming, intelligent, funny person....as long as they LOOK like Brad Pitt/George Clooney/Harrison Ford ( insert your particular favorite heartthrob here ).

People do that, no matter how much they want to avoid sounding superficial and deny it from the hilltops.

Wow, I think 74Drew is the only one who actually read my post and replied to my question/s. Drew, yes I see your point about it being creepy to be our age and have little to no experience. But what you stated about not sleeping with a busload of women is something to be proud of...especially if you haven't gotten an STD. I sure don't want that stuff in my body.

By the way folks, some mentioned being superficial about looks. I think it's foolish to lower one's standards just to "be" with somebody if they are not pleasant to look upon, or if they refuse to take care of their health, i.e. losing weight if that is the known issue. A majority of the time since grade school, being a "nice guy" as some of us had negatively spoke of has gotten me attention from the unattractive girls all the time because I've given them the time of day that they are noticed. Sucks to be me in that I don't find them attractive, because then I'd be happy with someone. Therefore, physical attraction is a MUST to be happy. If I can't see myself waking up every day to see the face of that woman I'm with, I can't be with her. Same thing goes for you ladies. Admit it, you think all the way to wedding bells ringing when you see someone as a potential partner.

I've raved enough for now.

P.S. Me being a nice guy only makes me a rarity, not a whiner.

Actually he wasn't the only one that read your post and you've stated the same thing others have stated myself included.. We sort of went off on our own tangents b/c that's where the conversations went...

And don't forget...that's just what we DO around here.

Tangents run rampant....lmao

agree with clay face

Thank you, Jurtule :)

wow! this thing has a life of its own...craziness

Can a guy get a date?

I don't know can a guy do what is generally necessary ?

If he considers his profile as a dateing resume and actually puts up flattering smileing photos rather than an icon or something that wouldn't even pass as a DMV would help.

Most women don't expect a doctorial thesis but writing some of the interests that a date would actually be interested in shareing makes you sound like a lot more fun than a walk through a testosteron filled gym. Stateing the kind of woman you would find a little more interesting than a boty call doesn't hurt. Most women want to be liked for the individual they are.

Probably won't hurt to put on something a little more stylish than baggy pants, and undershirt, a baseball cap, and shades. What you make as a first impression is directly going to be linked to how you will be expected to show up for a date. Few women are going to be impressed with your toys that you share with the boys. A respecably clean car is a plus but we are "not in love with your car" and your wallet doesn't carry on a fun conversation. Pets are fine but unless you are planning to bring them on your date we really don't need to see them.

You might want to think about getting involved in something where you could invite a first time date besides your apartment. I don't know many women who would after a few casual and positve conversations who would turn down a date to a public venue to see a zoo, bowl, watch a highschool or community college event, play a few penny slots, wander a flea market, or have a dessert in a local mall but you will defintely establish yourself as a contender for her time if you ask her to meet you for a specific date a few days ahead. Or following up with a polite Thank you for her time and effort to be with you. Forgetting a date is a privilege not and entitlement will sink you before you ever get out of dry dock.

Stop the I am not a hunk junk and clean up your act. Having a fresh hair cut or what hair you have groomed with a little more style than cutting it so close it is barely there and a clean shave has proven it will up your odds. What is really more important to you? A few whiskers or getting cheek to cheek with a date? Buy a pair of clippers and clean up your hands and for heavens sake take them out of your pockets or making some stupid out dated hand gesture.

Next you might want to have something a little more socially acceptable and pleasantly memorable than some self loathing, boreing monicer that a half a dozen other guys have. If it wouldn't fly as your opening statement in another social setting don't use it on line. Doesn't hurt to actually have and ISP address that isn't going to load up her computer with pop-ups and spam or be associated with Scammers. Asking somone to look you up somewhere else is rude and stupid when there is plenty of competion right here. It is like saying you are too lame to talk to here. And it actually won't kill you to stay on site more than thirty seconds before you start whineing about how no body loves you.

And the IM feature. If someone doesn't invite you it is pretty good chance they don't want to talk to you. If they wanted to be interrupted in whatever conversation they were in they would send you at least a nudge.

I think the simple answer to the original question is...

As hard as the guy wants it to be.

wow!

If I was on the receiving end of that it would harsh my mellow.

Darlin only if the shoe fits. The guy is asking what it takes to get a date and that is an answer. Harsh? LOL Dating isn't for sissy's. Very competive game. If you are not wining it is probably because you don't know the rules and foul out.