Well, not in those words, but yeah. I considered the source and decided they were in no position to be making such judgments, and they are no longer in my life.

Of coure I do by the boys most everything they want. But what I meant by love, for instance my sister has this thing where she needs to be the center of attention and always get her way.. B/c I love her, I allow it and as long as it's not hurting me what's the big deal... Well, she ends up smashing me along with it every single time... I've drawn the line... Most recently she's decided to drag my oldest son over her way.. Well I cried was hurt and was told I was selfish to let him go... He screamed and cursed at me called me names all b/c I told him I would rather him live with me.. After he did all of that I said 'it's apparent what you want so you go ahead and go b/c you're not treating me like this anymore'.. I took his stuff to her house and the reaction from him was "Mom disowned me" the reaction from here was "you dropped your kid on my doorstep" my reaction was "wtf, you've both been harassing me for days to let go and I give you what I want and it's mean"... I am very confused and deeply hurt that my son thinks I disowned him BUT I am not going to be yelled and screamed at and called names by anyone, my son got away with it far too long b/c I love him so much.. so yesterday I drew the line.. I pray I don't lose him forever but how many more years was I supposed to let this go on? He's 24 btw..

((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((indy!!))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

mew.




does vinny need to pay a visit? give em one of those offers?



you treat you mother with respect!!!! younknowhatimean? eh kid?

Uhhhhhhhhh 24???? Maybe you need to give him his "Im a grown up now" diploma!!! Oh and a "Go get a job" diploma!!

Exactly, 24 does the things I mentioned and I'm mean for finally putting my foot down... Which I wouldn't have done but he told me what a piece of sh1t I am and he wanted to live with his aunt... So I packed his clothes... She even told me that she's going to kick him out eventually and he'd be back with me b/c I'd never close my door so why not just let him do what he wants.. I did and now she's mad at me too.. um I don't get it do you???

IndnPrncs >

I went through something similar with my oldest about a year ago (he just turned 21). I finally told him to just leave if I was so bad. It was difficult. I made sure I called and left messages on his voice mail every few days (he wouldn’t answer my calls) telling him I still loved him, was here for him, wished him the best, and hoped things would be better if we didn’t have to put up with each other so much. It took a few weeks, but he finally called me back to say hello. Little by little, things got better. Now we get along as well as we did before all his ‘growing pains’ and he comes by almost daily to talk and hang out.

Allow a little space and time, but make sure he doesn’t forget how much you love him and things will eventually be ok again.

Joy, that's a tough situation you're in, but I was thinking the same thing. Thought you were talkin' about a 12 or 13-year-old, not 24. They're manipulating you. Sis needs to stay out of your issues with your kid and the kid needs to grow up. Stand your ground, hon.

Stick to your guns. He will be back....24 and whining you disowned him??? hahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.... Does he think he can live with him mama forever???

lmaoooooooooooo princessssssssss!!! Can I live with you???

Dont feel guilt joy.......but letting go is the hardest thing a parent can do. I know.......

And "manipulating" you is exactly what your eldest son (and your sister) are doing to you. And they keep on doing it because you allow yourself to manipulated.

Basically put, you have to leave the son to his own devices. He's old enough to do his own thing, and you don't need to be there to be his security blanket any more.

Your son needs to grow up and learn how to respect his mother. Even though he is somewhere else, just let him know that you are trying to keep in contact with him and everything will work out. Good Luck.

makea list of what you've done for him, and put his name next to it and until he's exceeded that list, he is not welcome till he grows up....he knows you are there for him, and a user mentallity will try to work around this, but this list and fact will help you hold your ground, because this IS destructive toward YOU....he's 24, and good looking and will live off girls when he's finnished with you.. when you are filthy rich, throw him a bone, but not until then. the pain of releasing him is exceeding the pain of your welfare, they argue because that is the way they use you, and make you feel bad, and guilty, and that pain is worse than him treating you like poop when he's there.

No, can't say that I have.

thank you all of you.... I'm working on letting them swim in their own stuff for a while without involving me.. Hopefully my son will learn from this decision he's made and forced me to make..

Now y'all are getting the idea! I wasn't looking for support, apologies, or to stir up, continue or entertain anybody with drama; just experiences and how you may deal with it. Sure I'm crushed, but would rather be told by somebody who actually matters to me in hopes that I could fix whatever's wrong. And thanks to what I've read, I can see things from different perspectives.

well, your post has helped heal some folks here, and anytime that one person can help or make a positive impact, it could be life changing as it is here, and precipices to be overcome with others help make the journey that is never ever easy, a little more bearable to get through serious obstacles....i wish you good healing, and a prosperous future.

I'm rather cold, so it doesn't bother me but for maybe a day or two. Well, at least a lot of people call me cold...I disagree, but I suppose my personal history is a pretty good indicator of it.

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