Community > Dating & Relationships

Topic: Sabotage
KimmiM Joined Sat 12/27/08 Posts: 1694	Thu 05/07/09 06:56 PM
Yep. And I know that I've been guilty of it. Not consciously at the time, but I'm guilty, nonetheless.

MirrorMirror Joined Fri 10/26/07 Posts: 89680	Thu 05/07/09 06:57 PM
Yep. And I know that I've been guilty of it. Not consciously at the time, but I'm guilty, nonetheless.

MirrorMirror Joined Fri 10/26/07 Posts: 89680	Thu 05/07/09 06:58 PM
Yes

moofooga Joined Thu 01/31/08 Posts: 25515	Thu 05/07/09 07:00 PM
Do you think some people sabotage their relationships because they don't know how to handle being in one? I personally think they do such things because they don't know what they want. They over-think what their overall goals are in whatever relationships they're trying to take part in and -in the end- they end up shooting themselves in the foot. Of course, they could also be sabotaging their relationships because they just have a total lack of common sense, too.

MirrorMirror Joined Fri 10/26/07 Posts: 89680	Thu 05/07/09 07:02 PM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-sbqIyeed4g Thank you

trsmith22 Joined Sat 08/02/08 Posts: 5959	Thu 05/07/09 07:02 PM
Do you think some people sabotage their relationships because they don't know how to handle being in one? I have actually been quilty of that. Not because I didn't know how to handle it, but because it scared the crap outta me

JustAGuy2112 Joined Sun 12/16/07 Posts: 18033	Thu 05/07/09 08:26 PM
Do you think some people sabotage their relationships because they don't know how to handle being in one? Speaking from experience... Absolutely. My ex g/f flat out told me that the fact that I loved her with no conditions scared the hell out of her and that she just couldn't handle it. Many times, people say they know exactly what they want out of their partner. The problem is that when a partner shows up that is " exactly " what the other wanted, it suddenly becomes a case of " There must be something wrong here. I can't believe it could be true. " A lot of that comes from bad experiences in the past , which, no matter how much people say they have " let go " of, still cause them to not accept their partner at face value no matter how long they have been together. This is especially true in new relationships. Experience has taught us that when a person seems to be all we have ever wanted, it normally won't turn out that way in the end. So rather than accept that the person really could be all we have ever wanted, we start picking apart things that may not be in that category. I think just about everyone, no matter how much they deny it, has been guilty of this kind of thing at one point or another in their lives.

TelephoneMan Joined Fri 10/12/07 Posts: 2297	Thu 05/07/09 08:45 PM
Most times I just simply tell people to go to hell... get the hell away from me, or just plain leave me the hell alone... because typically I can't stand being around human beings... Would much rather be left alone, living in the wilderness somewhere with the nearest neighbors over a hundred miles away... Not sure that is sabotage... more like simply being happy being alone with myself, and admittedly a complete recluse... My experience has been that typically most people (male and female) are vain, fake, shallow, and only want my attention for either personal gain or capital progress... I am much happier being alone

MirrorMirror Joined Fri 10/26/07 Posts: 89680	Thu 05/07/09 09:58 PM
Do you think some people sabotage their relationships because they don't know how to handle being in one? Speaking from experience... Absolutely. My ex g/f flat out told me that the fact that I loved her with no conditions scared the hell out of her and that she just couldn't handle it. Many times, people say they know exactly what they want out of their partner. The problem is that when a partner shows up that is " exactly " what the other wanted, it suddenly becomes a case of " There must be something wrong here. I can't believe it could be true. " A lot of that comes from bad experiences in the past , which, no matter how much people say they have " let go " of, still cause them to not accept their partner at face value no matter how long they have been together. This is especially true in new relationships. Experience has taught us that when a person seems to be all we have ever wanted, it normally won't turn out that way in the end. So rather than accept that the person really could be all we have ever wanted, we start picking apart things that may not be in that category. I think just about everyone, no matter how much they deny it, has been guilty of this kind of thing at one point or another in their lives. thanks J.A.G.

MirrorMirror Joined Fri 10/26/07 Posts: 89680	Fri 05/08/09 05:10 PM
Most times I just simply tell people to go to hell... get the hell away from me, or just plain leave me the hell alone... because typically I can't stand being around human beings... Would much rather be left alone, living in the wilderness somewhere with the nearest neighbors over a hundred miles away... Not sure that is sabotage... more like simply being happy being alone with myself, and admittedly a complete recluse... My experience has been that typically most people (male and female) are vain, fake, shallow, and only want my attention for either personal gain or capital progress... I am much happier being alone

robert1652 Joined Wed 11/14/07 Posts: 8447	Fri 05/08/09 05:27 PM
Do you think some people sabotage their relationships because they don't know how to handle being in one? Sabotage may not be a correct word here Mirror as the meaning is that you do it knowingly so may be we say ruin instead thanx for explaining that You are always welcome

MirrorMirror Joined Fri 10/26/07 Posts: 89680	Sat 05/09/09 12:30 PM
Do you think some people sabotage their relationships because they don't know how to handle being in one? I have actually been quilty of that. Not because I didn't know how to handle it, but because it scared the crap outta me

Bi_CurizGrl Joined Sun 11/05/06 Posts: 675	Sat 05/09/09 02:17 PM
I think it's more common than people realize.

PATSFAN Joined Mon 12/10/07 Posts: 42782	Sat 05/09/09 02:19 PM
People with issues , yes

MeChrissy2 Joined Sat 12/13/08 Posts: 10155	Sat 05/09/09 04:58 PM
From experience as well, fear plays a serious factor. Just a Guy was spot on. You can't believe you might actually find what you are looking for so you ensure you don't. I don't think it's done maliciously, just letting the fear get the better of you. Hurt them before they can hurt you mentality.

JustAGuy2112 Joined Sun 12/16/07 Posts: 18033	Sat 05/09/09 05:23 PM
Do you think some people sabotage their relationships because they don't know how to handle being in one? Speaking from experience... Absolutely. My ex g/f flat out told me that the fact that I loved her with no conditions scared the hell out of her and that she just couldn't handle it. Many times, people say they know exactly what they want out of their partner. The problem is that when a partner shows up that is " exactly " what the other wanted, it suddenly becomes a case of " There must be something wrong here. I can't believe it could be true. " A lot of that comes from bad experiences in the past , which, no matter how much people say they have " let go " of, still cause them to not accept their partner at face value no matter how long they have been together. This is especially true in new relationships. Experience has taught us that when a person seems to be all we have ever wanted, it normally won't turn out that way in the end. So rather than accept that the person really could be all we have ever wanted, we start picking apart things that may not be in that category. I think just about everyone, no matter how much they deny it, has been guilty of this kind of thing at one point or another in their lives. thanks J.A.G. You are more than welcome, Mirror.

MirrorMirror Joined Fri 10/26/07 Posts: 89680	Sat 05/09/09 10:05 PM
Do you think some people sabotage their relationships because they don't know how to handle being in one? Speaking from experience... Absolutely. My ex g/f flat out told me that the fact that I loved her with no conditions scared the hell out of her and that she just couldn't handle it. Many times, people say they know exactly what they want out of their partner. The problem is that when a partner shows up that is " exactly " what the other wanted, it suddenly becomes a case of " There must be something wrong here. I can't believe it could be true. " A lot of that comes from bad experiences in the past , which, no matter how much people say they have " let go " of, still cause them to not accept their partner at face value no matter how long they have been together. This is especially true in new relationships. Experience has taught us that when a person seems to be all we have ever wanted, it normally won't turn out that way in the end. So rather than accept that the person really could be all we have ever wanted, we start picking apart things that may not be in that category. I think just about everyone, no matter how much they deny it, has been guilty of this kind of thing at one point or another in their lives. thanks J.A.G. You are more than welcome, Mirror.

misstina2 Joined Sat 11/01/08 Posts: 13508	Tue 05/26/09 12:06 AM
some people are crazy

Gypsy41 Joined Tue 05/15/07 Posts: 123359	Tue 05/26/09 12:09 AM Edited by Gypsy41 on Tue 05/26/09 12:09 AM
yA and it gets old...... and so do they!!!

XxAchillesxX Joined Sun 01/11/09 Posts: 318	Tue 05/26/09 12:11 AM
That's a given. My youngest daughter did that with her first marriage. She married a guy just to spite another one....naturally her marriage ended in utter failure and misery for her. She has since learned her lesson (I hope).