I dunno, I'm actually between churches right now as every time I go to one and try and get involved I notice it's very clique-ish, and one of the main reasons I go in the first place is to try and escape that kind of thing

Speaking for myself, maybe I'm trying to hard just to connect with someone. Leaving no stone unturned. Has it really become this difficult to meet someone from the opposite sex that I'm posting ads online, trying to sell myself? Is my last resort to go to church and pray that God sends someone, than cross my fingers that she's stable, sane, and honest. I see postings from thousands of women from all over the country that are just as single as I am yet not a single reply to my post. Quite a few views though. :) It's almost easier to dust off the old black book and rekindle an old flame with an ex than it is to meet someone new. Plus i'll be more prepared to deal with them, their flaws and faults in the sequel. Just a thought.

ah i feel ya man.

and i know what you mean about the ex's part. sometimes it just seems 100x easier to do that.

?....maybe it is just me...seems like I constantly get replies to my comments and more often than not, it is the ladies who initialize contact in the first place. And WITHOUT FAIL...it is always the women who bring up the subject of sex first.

Yeah I think it takes time. I don't think going back with x is good there is a reason they are a x. Unless children are involved. And you can resolve differences.

Well...I like to consider myself among the women with good morals and values. I'm not one to talk about sex online with someone I barely know. I don't sleep around. In fact I take sex very seriously and view it as an expression of love, not just a way to feel good. I think the majority of our problems as a sexual culture is that we have begun to view sex as casually as you would a handshake.

When people begin to see sex that casually, the odds of finding someone who will really be committed in a relationship becomes increasingly more difficult.

I constantly run into men that come on like a dog in heat. I keep expecting one to start peeing on my leg or something. I mean...if you could SEE HALF of the messages I get from men, you would **** yourself with the way they talk to me. They say things that even HUSTLER wouldn't print, and expect us to swoon over them. SOME even get offended when you DON'T! it's rediculous.

I agree with what Raven said.

I can only imagine, probably gets worse depending on what pictures are posted I've tried initiating contact here but it never works, then the ones who contact me are either flaky, fake, or they email me once and then never again. (I guess I'm a good timekiller until the ones they really want to talk to get back to them or something.) Funniest thing to me is how many millions of threads are on here about how there are no good guys left, where are they? where did they go? why are we all jerks and blah blah blah (the only thing that even comes close in number is all the lame "there is no God" threads)....meanwhile...those of us "good guys" who do make the effort never get anywhere anyway, if I could ask for any one thing on here i think my one and only wish would be for more courtesy, I take the time to reply to all of my messages whether I'm interested or not, sure wish other people would do the same instead of just blowing people off etc.

Well, I suppose that's why they call it the dating "game". HAHA! cuz everyone's out to play or be played now-a-days. and for those of us who don't like to play, we are stuck on the sidelines waiting for the cast offs. By the time we get them, they have been destroyed by the game or they have BECOME the game. Either way, we all get screwed in the end.

best advice I can give is something you are already doing to begin with. And that is replying to all messages, and keep an open mind. Because you never know when that RIGHT person will cross your path. But remember, Thomas Eddison, when asked if he got discouraged when making the light bulb, said..."Certainly not! I learned 9998 ways how NOT to make a light bulb." Well same thing goes with dating really. and life in general.

Reading the post, Raven seems so true. So many have been burned my age trust issues on both sides. After not dating for 30 and coming back can be very depressing. And for the young ones keep faith :) with all the negative there is also possitive. I think that is why people jump to fast you been out there for a while and find the one that shows you attention and everyones knows that story.

I know Mr. Gabriel. It is extremely harsh but true nonetheless. If we don't stop the nonsense women will start hanging together in big groups as they ALREADY have. It's time for all of us fellas to be more patient and just go out for that reason alone..."to go out". Let's keep our wills with good intnetions gents.

It's also not easy for me to say in the slightest but "men and women; just hang in there." We cannot expect our future "one" to just pop up and be extremely perfect in every aspect or way. It might take like what seems to be an eternity but you will run into someone.

I disagree with the "thrill of the chase" but all we can do is try and keep our itentions good and then something will come of them. In the meantime just make friends and hope that someone will come into your life. It's sad waiting but you have to work for it.

That's funny, because I get messages all the time from men I never met before and first words out of their mouths are things like, "Do you like sex?" or "Wanna see me cum?" or "wanna f**K?" I mean for REAL people! I'm pretty sure women do NOT come on like THIS. In fact I'm pretty sure they would be a bit more subtle about it.

I agree with Raven there might be the few but for the most part NOT. I mean I think it strange with all the sexual diease out there when someone comes on to you the first date. But I guess the internet is a easy way of free sex for some.

you are very right. More and MORE I'm seeing men that EXPECT a woman to be completely free with her body on the first date and when I try and talk to a man on the net, they nearly ALWAYS try to get me to "cyber sex" with them. It's ridiculous! Men REALLY have to learn to tone down the hormones a bit. No respectable woman is going to want to be with a man who acts in this manner. I could paste a few conversations I have had with various men just to prove my point here, but I think you all get the idea.

Men have to start acting like gentlemen again, not sex crazed dogs in heat!

Definition of a "gentleman" has seemed to become subjective over time. For instance, I was raised between a ranch and city life and was brought up to respect your elders, respect the opposite sex, respect the Lord, and to respect yourself. The keyword is, you got it, respect. Yet in today's time, I have been told not to call someone "ma'am", have been slapped for opening a door for a lady, and actually laughed at for expressing manners. This enigma just stumps me even more when I see threads/posts saying "all I want is to be treated like a lady", yet when one acts that way - you are brushed aside as yesterday's news.
The problem with "online dating" is you never know what you are actually dealing with. Yet for instances like me, I do not handle the bar scene (too many moronic imbeciles) well and I work too much to actually get out often.

You wait for that girl that values your morals.

Firespark stick with your values and the morals you have been taught they will pay off in the end. Just ask any Real Gentlemen no matter what others say or do never let them change what you have learned!!

Kuddos to you for retaining what you have been taught!!