Last Jan I seperated from my ex wife. Now I'm trying to once again start a relationship... but it's causing issues with a girl I'm getting to know, from her passed experiences of dating seperated guys it's gone bad... is there anything do or say that'll convince her that, this time will be different?

p.s. I did also mention to her that my ex and I tried getting back together in Sept, but failed due to no more love in the air between us. Was it a bad move to have mentioned this?

I am kinda going through that now, my boyfriend is going through a divorce from his ex. My advice is to just be extremely honest from the start. Don't hide or sugar coat anything about your ex.

i have been there. i was with a guy for 2yrs and he was separated from his wife for 5yrs and they never talked. in fact i helped him with the paper work on his divorce..
were not together anymore, for i got sick and tired of supporting his ass. he was lazy. he got married about 2yrs ago and i still talk to him every now and then..

I can use some help with the paperwork it's almost in a different language. The divorce process won't even take that long, we have no kids and no property is being fought over.

Yes, get the divorce ASAP


Honesty is good, but if you tried to reconcile with your wife that recently, your girlfriend is right to be concerned.

Sorry about your pending divorce I hope it goes as smoothly as possable & best wishes for you & your girlfriend.

im emailing you now

Yes. Actualy get divorced.

it can work out as long as you are both honest and caring.
don't get involved with anyone though if you still have
the desire to try to get back together with your es. that
is her fear and it is a concern that is often justified.
but if the previous is really over pending court action and
there is no chance that the ex is getting back in the picture
then, well, we all have to move on at some point.

good luck to you all.

If you still have any romantic feelings for your ex, that can be a problem for your current relationship. But if you are absolutely sure that you don't, then just let your girlfriend know that. The thing is that your girlfriend is probably thinking, "hmmm, he tried to get back with her not long ago, does he still have feelings for her?" Put yourself in her shoes. How would you feel?

take care of your loose ends, your divorce isnt your new gf problem its yours and your ex wifes. she should be no part of helping with the paperwork either..

Are you married or separated? Your post reads that yo divorced, got back together but did not remarry, then separated again, and now you are trying to date someone else. Seriously....

If you aren't explaining it well here (yes I read that you are still married)... then how are you explaining it to others?

You must live in a world where it's okay to date if you are married. I live in another reality....

Get a divorce already..... and stop dating 'til you figure out what way is up.

Relationships don't come with a guarantee, so there's nothing you can say. Your either deeply attracted to each other, or not. Im 55 years old, and i've been in alot of relationships along the way. I've come to the conclusion that the best way to make sure your with the right person, is not to have sex for a long time. If you can't wait at least 6 months before sharing the sheets, you don't really love and respect her anyway. If neither of you can wait, then your headed for doom. If you want to prove your sincerity to a possible future mate, tell her you have a 6 month rule about sexual activity, so you can really get to know each other. It all comes down to what your really looking for. I bet you didn't wait even 30 days before having intercourse with your ex, or any of your past GF's for that matter. It's not that difficult to see the pattern once you look back and think about it.The worse you want it, the worse you'll get it. Dennis