A very elderly gentleman in his mid-nineties, very well-dressed, hair
well-groomed, great looking suit, flower in his lapel and smelling
slightly of aftershave, presenting a well-looked after image, walks into
an upscale ****tail lounge. Seated at the bar is an elderly-looking
lady, in her mid-eighties.

The gentleman walks over, sits alongside her, orders a drink, takes a
sip, turns to her and says, "So, tell me. Do I come here often?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A couple in their nineties are both having problems remembering things.
During a checkup, their doctor tells them that they're physically okay,
but they might want to start writing things down to help them remember.
Later that night, while watching TV, the old man gets up from his chair.
"Want anything while I'm in the kitchen?", he asks.

"Will you get me a bowl of ice cream?"

"Sure."

"Don't you think you should write it down so you can remember it?", she
asks.

"No, I can remember it."

"Well, I'd like some strawberries on top, too. Maybe you should write it
down, so's not to forget it?"

He says, "I can remember that. You want a bowl of ice cream with
strawberries."

"I'd also like whipped cream. I'm certain you'll forget all that, so
maybe you should write it down?"

Irritated, he says, "I don't need to write it down. I can remember it!
Ice cream with strawberries and whipped cream. I got it, for goodness
sake!" Then he toddles into the kitchen.

After about 20 minutes, the old man returns from the kitchen and hands
his wife a plate of bacon and eggs.

She stares at the plate for a moment.

"Where's my toast?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Three old guys are out walking.

First one says, "Windy, isn't it?"

Second one says, "No, it's Thursday!"

Third one says, "So am I. Let's go get a beer."

that's good one thank for the laugh