Primary parachute failure at 4400 feet.

I don't know if this is really " irrational " or not but....a little insight into why i am the way I am....

My Dad took off when I was seven.

Many members of my family didn't like the fact that he did that, then proceeded to project their dislike of his actions onto me because I had the unfortunate genetic sequence that made me sound and look a lot like him.

Basically, what I heard for the rest of my childhood and teenage years was " You are nothing more than a stupid piece of sh*t just like your father. You will never be anything. You are just like him and you will ALWAYS be just like him. "

Well...there is a saying that says something like " if you tell a person a lie often enough, they will begin to see it as truth ".

For a lot of years, I felt that they were right. I really WAS stupid and useless.

Of course, that didn't stop me from reading almost everything I could get my hands on. But of course, I also got a lot of " Why are you even bothering? We aren't good enough for you so you always have to keep your nose stuck in a book?? You are so stupid that it isn't going to do you any good anyway. "

These days, I take great satisfaction from knowing that my IQ ( I am NOT bragging so please don't take it that way ) is higher than any TWO of them ( the ones who took delight in letting me know how " stupid " I was ) combined.

The problem is this. I ALSO, to this day, clam up when I am around new people because I have a fear of sounding as stupid as they told me I was. I have tried everything, including counseling, to get past that particular problem. But it hasn't helped at all. It always takes me a little while to get comfortable enough to be able to just relax enough to say what I want to say.

It's the biggest reason that I have such a tough time approaching a woman.

((((((((((JUSTAGUY)))))))))

peanut butter mixed with pickle juice.......

That took some serious balls my brother. I bow to you and pray those fears leave you and never haunt you again.

Thanks, Gypsy.

I guess it all boils down to being a little insecure about it. I am comfortable with who I am as far as how I look and all that other stuff.

That particular fear is the one thing I just simply cannot get past.

I truly believe that it's also the one thing that is going to keep me from finding " the one ".

: sighs :

Thanks, man.

I appreciate it.

That's mine as well.

Irrational fear or not...you are way better then anyone who ever said or done any of those things. Cowards can do that really easy...bravery is more in what you just did!!! Hugs to you!!!!

Really, needles used to be it...anymore I'm not quite sure.

This message is brought to you by the number 12...when the sh** hits the fan, think 12.

Im often afraid of the number 8.........

Thank you. I suppose that there are some that will see my post as nothing more than a " Look at me " type of thing...but that's their problem.

I don't go looking for sympathy.

My MAIN reasons for posting it were

1) To give a woman who says she wants a " real " guy a look at what that really means.

and

2) Because I KNOW that there are others out there like me. I want them to know that they aren't alone.

Im afraid of fishy purses!!!! DONT ASK!!!

AMEN to that!!!!

Why?????????????

Ok, I just had to.

Would you like a fishy purse???? ahaaaaaaaaa long story~~!!

lol, no! I was just wondering why you had one.

I absolutely fear Spiders and Snakes I will become irrational till the bloody things are gone, preferable dead.
As for camera's I prefer to have snapshots taken I love taking pictures but hate to have mine taken. Always end up with my mouth open most of the time.

My irrational fear is driving over a high bridge and going over the side. I will "white knuckle" the steering wheel until all the way across. Irrational thing is I have no fear of heights or driving anywhere else.