So on Saturday a girl had viewed my profile, and I thought to myself "She's hands down the most beautiful girl to have viewed my profile yet!" Obviously, she wasn't showing any interest, as she didn't mail me, but I decided to take initiative, and tell her I like how she worded her profile. She told me thanks, and I replied with:

"I have a confession to make: The intention of contacting you wasnt cause I wanted to tell you how awesome your use of the word Outlandish was(though its a badass word) The reason I contacted you was because I thought you were smokingly stunning, and had a killer kind-hearted smile.

I think with most everybody, their personality shines through in their appearance, how they present themselves I suppose, and you just struck me as a very neat person that I'd like to talk to. "

From that point on out, we hit it off really well, replying to eachother's emails within minutes of sending them, and we talked for about 6 hours straight. Early on she had told me how much she really liked talking to me, and about halfway through, sent me a friend request.

It was me that eventually had to call it a night, as I had an 11 hour shift at work ahead of me, but I went to bed with a smile, as she promised to email me with more questions, and that she was looking forward to getting to know me more the next day.

So I check my email, no reply, then I go online to look at her profile again, and it was deactivated...

I was at a loss for words. Frustrated that I wasted 6 hours of my time, frustrated that I let my hopes get up, just for them to be shattered.

For me at least, I've resorted to the online dating, because my luck with girls in the area is less than pristine. I never took this site as a place to find "the one" but I'm always open to anything that presents itself in a positive light. I guess it just feels like the one place I could go to meet people that were actually looking for relationships turns out to be no different than anywhere else.

My initial thought is that I might have scared her off by coming on too strong, but I've read and reread our conversations over the past 2 days, and I'm certain that I didn't lay it on too thick...

Is there any ideas as to what went wrong, or what I did wrong? Any insight is greatly appreciated, and I thank anyone who read this whole thing for their time, if nothing else.

Ive known people to deactivate with no notice...maybe they decide to start looking irl or something...maye an old flame called her or something...who knows.

she wasnt the "ONE" ...i gotta quit watching the MATRIX..really...

she could have been a fake profile, especially if she had really beautiful pics. i've seen some really "hot" pics of men on here and i'm fairly certain the profiles are fake. sorry you got disappointed. just chalk it up to 6 hours of harmless fun and move on. good luck!

same thing has happened to me. you seem like a well put together guy. keep looking she is out there. just cant let it drag u down.

I understand what you said, and I do not know how to phrase this rightly, so will use me as the example.

I put more effort and hope into email with people who seem to genuinely be interested. Genuine, versus general stuff that prevents really getting to know anyone.

After a few emails, either the person deactivates or simply doesn't respond anymore. There are two exceptions, so far, whom I've remained in contact with, on a regular basis. If not for those two, I would be in your shoes, asking what I did wrong, but those two assure me that I am unlikely to be at fault.

I hope that you develop a few acquaintances here who will do for you what these Mingle ladies have done for me. It is a blessing worth seeking.

Hey bro, I read you blog...and well...not much to say but this -- I don't know how old you are, but stuff like that happens..and will happen in the future and my best advice is to not put too much into it...if she likes/liked you..she will definitely let you know...

Roco

I really didn't get the feeling she wasn't who she said she was. I suppose it sounds most likely that maybe an ex boyfriend, or current boyfriend or something came back, and she must have just lost interest *sigh*

Guess I gotta work on being more interesting!

I completely agree with scoundrel. I only put any effort into getting to know her, because she genuinely was putting forth effort to get to know me. Every other person who I've been with contact on this site either loses interest in me after 2-3 emails, or I lost it in them.

You did nothing wrong.

Basically, your story is consistent with EVERYTHING I have personally experienced in online dating. You lucked out in that you weren't led on for weeks or months or longer. Consider yourself blessed, in that regard.

Simple law of averages dictates that there must be some legitimate people on these sites. I have yet to see any evidence of it.

ok.. as mostly all we have had so far is the male opinioin... lets try some optimisim for a change
lol

could be a number of things.. could be that she always deactivates her profile upon signing out.. i have known people to do that to keep the freaks at bay..
could be she was a thread poster and got in some trouble with the admin.. and now she was deactivated by the "powers that be"

could be that she has a rough past with men and she got scared cuz she liked you so much that she was afraid of a history repeat.. (ive been there)

coulda been that she had some issues going on with another person sho was harassing her and she deactivated to get away from them...

or she was having a bad day and deactivated because she was stressed and frusterated..

if she deactivated her profile.. then any email she sent you would magicly disapear when she deacgtivates.. and its possible that she didnt know that


just a thought or 2 on what coulda happend

point being.. it was probibly NOTHING that you did.. probibly an issue with her and not you....


have a niceday

and keep trying.. if i can find love.... ANYONE can!

there could be a million reasons why she deleted
and 99% of them probably had nothing to do with you

you're good looking
you're young
you are creative and very expressive according to your profile
there is no reason you shouldn't find the 'one'
try to have fun with meeting people until you can feel that connection you're longing for.
it'll come...don't look so hard for it

you spent 6 wonderful hours with someone that made you feel good...why was that a waste?..you have no idea why or what happened so there is no point trying to speculate..be grateful to have had this person in your life, no matter how brief it was....

As long as you expect nothing, you'll never be disapointed..expectations lead to attachment, attachment leads to suffering..

Damn it I wanted to say that.....

and this...

Who cares, this is the internet...Until it goes to the phone, NO ONE IS REAL.

Maybe he/she actually did start liking you and didn't have the heart to ask you for money.

Her account deactivation didn't delete her emails we sent back and forth.

Thank you.

But dating myself just doesn't have the same pizzazz it used to. For one thing, I'm WAY too predictable....

And with a Buddha like smile..............