Topic: Men VS women Jokes | |
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Q: Why are men like blenders?
A: You need one but you're not quite sure why. Q: Why is food better than a man? A: You don't have to wait an hour for seconds. Q: What's a man's idea of helping to make the bed? A: He gets out.. Q: Why are men and parking spots similar? A: The good ones are already taken and the ones left are handicapped. Q: How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: ONE! men will screw anything. Q: What do toilet seats, anniversaries and a clitoris have in common? A: Men miss them all. Q: How do you keep a man interested after marriage? A: Wear perfume that smells like beer. Q: How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? A: She starts the sentance with "A man once told me..." Q: Why did the woman cross the road? A: That's not the point, what's she doing out of the kitchen? Q: Did you hear about the guy who finally figured outwomen? A: He died laughing before he could tell anybody. Q: How many men does it take to change a toilet roll? A: We don't know it has never happened. Q: Why are there only snowmen and no snowomen? A: Because only men are stupid enough to stand out in the snow all Winter. Q: Why don't men get Mad Cow disease? A: Because men are pigs. Q: Why are guys like lawn mowers? A: They emit foul odors, are hard to get started, and do not last for long. Q: Why are men like laxatives? A: They irritate the **** out of you. Q: Why did God create man? A: Because vibrators don't mow lawns. Q: What are two reasons men don't mind their own business? A: No mind-No business. Q: Why is it hard for a women to find men who are sensitive, caring and good looking? A: Because those men already have boyfriends. Q: How is a man like a snowstorm? A: You never know when he's coming, how many inches you'll get or how long it will last. Q: Why are men given larger brains than dogs? A: So they don't hump women's legs at ****tail parties. Q: Why can't men get mad cow disease? A: Because they're all pigs. Q: What is the main difference between men and boys? A: Men's toys cost more money ADAM and Eve joke: Adam and eve were in the Garden of Eden, and Eve had not been there long and Adam was trying to get a grasp on the female thing, so he asked God if they could have a talk. God replied, sure your my son and I love you can ask me anything. So Adam asked, God you have given me the beautiful flowers and the sunset....But I look at Eve and she is so beautiful it takes my breath away... Why God, did you make eve so beautiful? God replied, my son that is easy, I made her that way so you would love her, Adam replied well, it worked but I have another question... I touch the cool water and rub the furry animals and they feel so good to me but I touch Eve and it is so wonderful my heart almost stops... God, why did you make her that way? God replied well Adam that is easy I made her that way so you’d love her...well Adam replied, it worked, I do, but God I have one more question and I don't mean to question your wisdom or anything, but God she is stupid, why did you make her stupid? God replied my son that is easy I made her that way so she would love you. |
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Lmbo!!!!!
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Here is one for you!
After the woman gave birth to a baby, her doctor stood solemnly at her bedside. "I have something I must tell you about your baby.." "What's wrong?" the alarmed mother asked. "Your baby is a hermaphrodite." "What's that?" "It means your baby has both male and female parts." "Oh my God!" the woman exclaimed. "You mean he has a penis and a brain?" |
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How many women does it take to change a light bulb?
Its an unknown fact they would rather sit in the dark and complain about it. |
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After, God created the earth.. He then created man and then he started
to have second thoughts and he said to himself: " Damn, I could of done better". So god created Woman. |
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