Topic: One Guy's Thoughts on "The Clique" | |
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I just noticed, on another thread, a guy who had been on JSH for awhile
was quitting because he felt the site was getting boring, and he mentioned a clique on JSH; sounded to me like he felt he had been excluded and wasn't ever going to fit in. You know, there was a point when I felt that way, too. Shortly after I signed up, I realized there was a group of posters who obviously had been on the site long before I was, who posted a lot (they had thousands and thousands of posts under their belts!), and talked about things and people that I knew nothing about. And I perceived a "clique" there, and I felt like it would be hard for me to ever fit in. So, what I did was, I started reading a bunch of the old posts, the ones that maybe nobody had commented on in a week or a month or whatever. And I started to get some perspective from that, I started to figure out who's who, and who were the "old established pillars" of the site, and such. And finally, I just said screw it, I'm going to start posting things, even if I'm not a member of the "clique." I figured, it's not like they can kill me or anything, not as long as I can avoid the bombs. This was a little out of character for me; I have been described as "reclusive to the point of intangibility," which is not far off the truth. But I liked the site, I liked what I was reading, and I wanted to be a part of it. And then a funny thing happened; I found out there really was no "clique" at all, at least not in the way I had imagined. The "old established pillars" turned out to be supportive and welcoming. I got a lot of nice e-mails from a lot of them. What I found out was that, yes, there are a lot of people who have been here for awhile, and they know each other, and they're comfortable with each other, and, sometimes, as people who have known each other for a long time will do, they make esoteric references that a new person probably wouldn't catch. But they are NOT exclusionary, they are NOT aloof, they are NOT standing off in the distance somewhere, looking down their noses at the newbies, laughing, and saying, "How droll, Max, here comes another pathetic tyro attempting to join our exalted pantheon...." You just have to let them get to know you. And the only way to do that is to put yourself out there and post things. It doesn't matter if you start new topics, respond to old ones, write a poem, tell a joke, whatever, just let it be known that you exist and that you want to be involved. Really, that's all it takes.... There's no "clique," it's just a bunch of people, good and caring and decent and supportive people, who will take you into the fold if you just let them know you're here.... |
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Want to learn to swim, you HAVE to get In the water.
Situations like this are the same. Jump in people. YOUR opinion is just as good as anyone elses. |
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Very nicely said Lex. I know the feeling that you are talking about. I
was nerves as heck when I first signed up. But like you said just start posting and let them know who you are and people here are great. And yes watch out for the bombs...lol Oh one more thing......... CATCH |
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I understand exactly what he is saying. I can add to a thread, and no
matter what i post or how often, I very rarely get any direct response |
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OnALark I feel the same way sometimes.
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(((((((whisper))))))) I've seen many of your posts; you're a great
person. Stick with it, ok? I will if you will |
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Whisper -- have you ever heard of a bomb-eating llama? See, they have
their uses. Lark -- not everything you post is going to generate a lot of feedback. You never know, because some threads die out quickly, and others linger forever, and there's no way to know which will do what. I think you just have to keep your presence out there, on a more or less consistent basis, if you really want to get noticed. A month ago, I never would have believed I'd have reached 250+ posts. Then you just get wrapped up in different discussions, and there it is.... |
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Oh trust me OnALark I am not going anywhere not know sine Lex mentioned
bomb eat llamas. Still so much more I need to learn around here...lol. |
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Gotta run; my son just showed up
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Take care OnALark ((((hug)))
Ok 2 more post before I hit 2000. |
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Lex that was a really good post I can see how people might be
intimidated by the regulars on this site but we are really welcoming and supportive. Thanks for writing that I wouldn't want any newcomer to feel not welcomed. |
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Good Morning,,
Lex,, you are an incredible writer and have an amazing ability to express yourself in your words,,, I have felt that way, and have come to learn people by reading them,, and once I started posting and got over the fear of not being excepted I have come to learn and feel the Love of the People here at JSH,, I have made some Incredible Friendships here that I will carry with me for the rest of my life,,, I would like to take this moment to introduce myself to you and those around::: My name is Denise I am 45 years old I have 4 Incredible kids and 1 Incredible Grandchild and 1 more on the way,,, I also met the most incredible Man in the world here on JSH,,, and we are making plans for our wedding,,, Well enough about me,, How are you all doing today,,,,, (((Whisper)))) whoaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa coming up on 2000 |
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((((((Mom))))) How are you.
Want a bomb? I am handing them out freely. Got to speak to lex about the bomb eating llama's though I am still unsure about them myself...lol. But YAY for 2000 post...lol. Ok Not that big of deal but I a hyper and in a good mood today. |
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((Whisper)))) I am great today,, good to see you smile my dear,,, 2000
Ohhhhhhhh Yaaaaaaaaaaaaa,,, I am still trying to get caught up on the llama's,,, |
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Well I do agree here. I felt like that in the beginning but it just as
oldsage said, to swing, you have to learn how to swim and I soon I learned how full of wonderful people this site is. |
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Well Mom stick with me. I am sure we can figure it out together
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Let me tell YOU a thing or two YOUNG MAN!!!!!
"I COULDN'T HAVE EVEN "TRIED" TO SAY THAT BETTER!!!!! Wink,wink. You hit OUR "NAIL" on its "HEAD" here on this HI site.. Thank you for letting us and the newbee's both SEE, and KNOW, how we "REALLY" are here and IT will HELP some to "GROW" HERE!!!! Welcome to this place and I trully hope that you will continue to make posts, and to keep us all in your REVIEWS!!! And I also FELT THIS "OVER-LOOKED" FEELING, When I first came here, then I added some pic's and said the hell with it and started speaking from ME, my Heart, and didn't care what others thought!!! Then I was rewarded with many, many, FRIENDS and close conversations about "EVERYTHING" that is in LIFE!! LOL And through that process,, I WAS FOUND, by a lady who NOW, will become my "WIFE!! LIFE IS SHARING "HERE" ON THIS SITE!! And I wish for YOU to have my same success here!! You are off to a GREAT FUTURE HERE, Good-luck!!! T |
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hey.. even us OLD TIMERS lmao were newbies once.. you just have to put
yourself out thar as LEX, old sage and the rest stated and just jump in.. it's ALL about having fun ya know.. AND RESPECT!! I made jokes.. laughed at myself.. heck.. on MANY occasions just TALKED to meself.. and people finally started coming round and yakin with me.. NOW?? I run one of GREATEst treads in the place.. the BAR.. and all because I thought it'd be FUN just to HAVE a place to hang out and chatters with a few new found friends.. half of us don't even DRINK.. but.. in REAL life when ya DON'T wanna go home cuz there's no one there or just CUZ.. you USUALLy end up at a local pub.. so... figured that was a good place to start... although NEVER thought I'm sure NONE of us thought it'd be THIS much of a hit!!! we've posted over 1500 PAGES (had to open a new one cuz the first one got too heavy ) and we're STILL going strong.. I don't wander round much in the other threads cuz the FIRST bar rule is NO DRAMA .. BUT.. Anyone can come in.. sit fer a spell.. yack with us regs and if yer reSPECTFul.. well.. you can ALWAys come back.. anywho.. for SOME of us it's our home away from home.. so.. if ya play NICE.. so will we.. O.. and remember to bring yer funny bone k?? nicely stated lex |
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Well said Lex, take care of the llama, if he stops eating the bombs, he
can always spit on them to put them out too. Take care. |
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Well, I just started here, and ain't one bit nervous of taking on any
bullsh*t clique. These are usually just groups of people who can only make "friends" that are as messed up as they are. Nope, never took their hooey in school, and sure ain't going to on some website. There is even one where I currently live, and I put them in their place way too easy. Just point out what weak morons they are, ever so sweetly, and they are usually too stupid to know why everyone else starts laughing at them. Be warned, clique better be a nice one, the exception to the rule, 'cause mean people SUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!! RFLMAO So, how do you like me so far ????? |
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