I have 2 friends who are roommates.. I have known one guy for about 2 years and am pretty close to him and I have become good friends with his roommate over the last 6 months or so.

My friend is about 28 "greg".. has a load of finacial problems and has failed to pay rent for the last 4 months to his roommate, who is only 20 "tom". I feel like greg, who I thought I knew, is taking advantage of his much younger roommate. I have lost so much respect for this guy and question the possibility of sustaining our relationship.

Greg maybe works 10-15 hrs a week, talks about doing nothing and being bored all the time, owes a lot of people money and spends his paychecks on alcohol rather then helping with rent or utilities.

we are all really good friends and tom has confided in me. I know that it is a situation that does not directly involve me and it needs to be handled between tom and greg.. but I can't help but feel I owe it to greg to be honest with him. Knowing this situation and acting like everything is ok doesn't settle right with me.


I wanted to ask all of you guy, Should I approach greg about the situation and openly support tom?

Do you live there?

Is it your name on the lease?


Then mind your own business...

Harsh.... but it is the truth.

Tom, can get off his arse grow some assertion and kick greg's arse to the curb...

Sounds like "Greg" needs his monkey @ass kicked back into reality and needs to grow up. He's a loser....

Are we channeling each other Brian?

greg fartedhe needs to go.

yea.. I feel like my good friend is kind of a douche and needs to hear some reality ..

has anyone ever been in a situation where you screw someone over and you can accept treating someone like that.

I have roommates and I pay my bills, it's life. I can't imagine not paying my part

Greg needs an intervention, and treatment for his problem.

I hit "Post Topic" and saw your reply Jess ...and was ROTF

We think waaaay too much alike

If they're both roommates, and the one who sucks has been your friend longer, don't you think it'd be a good idea to talk to your long-time friend about how he's just not cutting it as a roommate? OHHHH you mean they are roommates and you're not.

Well you can bring it up to your new friend, or you can tell your old friend you think it sucks how he's treating your new friend, but either way, it sounds like you need to talk to your old friend about how much he sucks and needs to get his sh!t together. Chances are good you may lose your old friend either way, but maybe he'll hit rock bottom after that and wake up. Sounds like he's really close to falling down already.

I feel like I can't just watch him f*ck someone over who is both of our friends. I'm embarrassed for him.. i'm scared for him and if I don't say anything to him.. am I being the friend he needs right now? it sucks

You know copperhugs, sometimes we have to just allow others their process...

Tom will figure it out, and so will greg.... you dont get to do THEIR work.

there is always 2 sides to a story

unfortunately ethereal is right.

Sometimes people just need a good ass kicking. Of course timing is everything... and so is tact

it feels so fake to me to feel for toms situation but at the same time say "it's ok" by my actions towards greg..

I have been in situations with friends and I didn't like my friends acting mutual when I was openly being hurt by someone..

I do agree that it is there business but I don't know if i can put two faces on

I would rather be open about knowing the situation and my stance on the whole thing..

I think as a friend to greg you should mention to him that he needs some financial guidance, and if he don't start paying the rent that he owes he may be kicked out and you worried that he will not have a place to live. But it really is Tom's place to tell greg to pay or leave though.

goof luck

that is exactly how I feel.. I'm almost ready to lose greg as a friend simply because I feel like he isn't the type of friend I want/need to hold onto

and if alcohol is his escape... he needs to hear it from someone who cares about him and get help

strong and truthful you are, life wisdom is not easy to give but later if he pulls out of his acidic funk, he'll thank you for being honest if he has the salt....let's hope he does....he was your friend of standing once....watch your back as well.

I think you have to be true to yourself