OMG are you serious???? This is starting to creep my out. It's almost like it's dying time or something.

Of my bra or of Patfan's wood?

Yeah..CLEAN, FRESH wood. Not dead particle board.

As long as it doesn't smell.....

Ok...so I bought this drawer chest at Ikea the other day. I put it together and the thing smelled like wood...not a big surprise but not really all that great when you wanna put your undies in it.

So I'm like...ok, I'm gonna just put some of these here air fresheners in the drawers. I work at Bath & Body Works, so I had some Evergreen Scentportables in my stash. Don't laugh...I like Evergreen and I stocked up on them after the Holidays.

Anyway. So the other day, I'm in the kitchen and I'm thinking "Why am I smelling Christmas tree??? I don't have anything like that plugged into my walls...yet the scent is following me around". Then it dawned on me. It was my bra. How cool is that?

I'm my own airfreshener!!!

Uh...no. But I saw this guy the other day at the mall and he had two tattoos on his neck. One was a hand granade and the other one said "DO ME". I'm not kidding.

I don't know where I'm at. Am I coming or am I going? I think I need some more coffee. But then again, it's almost noon here now...so maybe I should just get some lunch. Oh heck, I don't know.

I don't know...it's just looks...uh...naked.

I used to date a Canadian guy back in Atlanta. I hope he does NOT have a Happy Canada Day, eh?

To all you other Canadians:

Happy Canada Day!!!

I ain't dancing on nobodys grave, that's for sure. That ain't the way I was brought up.

He did this show called "Pitchmen" on the Discovery Channel with Anthony Sullivan, the annoying British guy that does infomercials. Yes, I thought Billy Mays was a loud weirdo and turned down the TV every time he came on. But the show kind of provided a look into his life and what he did...which was basically promoting products that people brought into his office with hopes of making it big. If he liked the product and thought it had potential, he'd go for it. Many people got rich and are living the American Dream because of him....inventing a product and having Billy Mays as your pitchman on TV was pretty much a homerun.

Really, the show made me kind of like him. He was really only half as annoying as he made himself out to be in his infomercials...it's what he did best. Pitching products while waking up people from their naps on the couch. He was a pro. The Discovery Channel show changed my mind about him...he was human after all, not just a yelling clown puppet on TV.

I'm going to miss him and I feel sad for his family. His adult son made an appearance on the show..he was just getting started producing infomercials of his own, only behind the cameras.

Weird

I have nothing to say about that. Shut up Dan

It was so hot outside today my deodorant quit working. Shut up, Dan.

Uh..yeah. If he calls or txts me. Which he hasn't in a week. Won't reply to my messages either. At this point the only excuse I'm willing to accept from him is personal death.

Please...at least YOU'RE getting laid! So just shup up, Dan, ok?

I wouldn't hump you if you were the last man on earth. Shut up Dan

April 18th...HA HA HA

Oh shut up, Keith