The Priest of a small village was very fond of his flock of ten hens and a cockerel.
He kept them in a hen house behind the parish, but one Saturday night, the cockerel was missing.
The priest, suspecting fowl play decided to say something about it at church the next morning.
At Mass, he asked the congregation, has anyone got a cock? To which all the men stood up.
"No,no," he said, somewhat flustered, "that's not what I meant. "Has anybody SEEN a cock?" All the women stood up.
"No, no," he said. "That's not what I meant either. Has anyone seen a cock that doesn't belong to them." Half the women stood up.
"No, no," He said, now thoroughly embarrassed "Perhaps I should rephrase the question: Has anybody here seen MY cock?" All the choirboys stood up.

Ok..

Hey hayiya will sound little different

I gave a blind friend of mine a cheese grater for his birthday.

He said it was the most violent book he'd ever read

This guy was showing his friend his new golf ball.

"This golf ball is state of the art" he said, "You just cannot lose this ball. If it goes in the rough it beeps, it glows in the dark, it floats in water and had an inbuilt GPS"

His friend said "Wow, where did you get it from?"

"I found it"

distant thunder and fresh rain.
When you approach the milk section you hear the sound of cows mooing and the smell of fresh hay.
When you go to the egg crates you hear the sound of clucking and sense the aroma of bacon & eggs frying.
The veggie department has the smell of buttered corn.

I don't buy my toilet paper there any more.....

Interesting topic marsgil. Is there such as ting as a Godly man? speaking for myself I have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. As I also choose to live my life in a biblical and scriptural way as my savior has commanded. Yet I know daily that I break those commandments as well sin every day. Yet only through Gods grace I am forgiven and NOT worthy. However I also realize why some may NOT be as open about their Faith online. As you probably already know or have experienced OUR statements of Faith can be ridiculed as well there are some who like to debate, argue and NOT have productive Good faith conversations sadly. So to sum it up don't lose faith in knowing there are Godly men on the internet as well this website. Yet many are NOT like myself and are as open and vocal to express or share. Thank you for your question as well reading my response. Enjoy the rest of your day and weekend. As Always keep smiling :) and enjoy the Journey.
_Jimmy

Interesting topic marsgil. Is there such as ting as a Godly man? speaking for myself I have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. As I also choose to live my life in a biblical and scriptural way as my savior has commanded. Yet I know daily that I break those commandments as well sin every day. Yet only through Gods grace I am forgiven and NOT worthy. However I also realize why some may NOT be as open about their Faith online. As you probably already know or have experienced OUR statements of Faith can be ridiculed as well there are some who like to debate, argue and NOT have productive Good faith conversations sadly. So to sum it up don't lose faith in knowing there are Godly men on the internet as well this website. Yet many are NOT like myself and are as open and vocal to express or share. Thank you for your question as well reading my response. Enjoy the rest of your day and weekend. As Always keep smiling :) and enjoy the Journey.
_Jimmy

Is this the complete joke in form of a question, or are we supposed to finish it ourselves?

So that's how you find their true age.

There are more than 7.5 billion people on earth, if you're looking for "the one" out of 7.5 billion, play the lottery instead, you have better odds

You need to love urself.. you will start likeing everything ;-)

You need to consult Dr. Rustom June Junwala