But you don't have to choose, and even when you do choose that's not the choice you're making. That's just one of those sad lies we tell ourselves to justify being so scared of face planting that we deny ourselves all possibility of joy or exhaltation.

You never swap a long term friendship for a night of joy. The long term friendship will survive or not according to its own agenda,

No, all you do is forgo the night of passion, that's the only decision that's made. Sadly, with that decision you also inadvertently discard a whole pile of other potentially great things; the possibility of true love, the possibility of a few years of something like it, the possibility of expanding your circle of close friends and wider acquaintances, an orgasm or two, the possibility of a truly unique and exciting sexual adventure (for all you know you may be passing up the greatest **** of your life), an opportunity to make another human being really happy.

Human intimacy is so exciting because it can be the very best of us, but it's scary because it is also dangerous. Who knows we just might get hurt.


To forgo the night of passion is not some glib sacrifice we make in the noble endeavour of ensuring the well being of a lifelong friendship.

There are two reasons for which we will forgo a night of passion;

1. We do not find the other person attractive. If this is the case we should say so, as kindly as possible. But let's be frank some folk need pointers, and this is a chance to help them. Tell them they need a hobby to have more interesting stories to tell, or whatever it may be. This person has just paid us the highest compliment one human can give another, they deserve our empathy, respect, and honesty.

2. We're more scared of what could go wrong than we are excited by the possibilities. That's usually the ugly truth we are hiding from ourselves with our glib and evasive white lies.

This is it, this is all you ****ing get, there's no replays, extra time, or rematches. One shot, one hand, then it's over. No more chances, ever.

All of us exist on a razor's edge, with death never more than a breath away. Forgo nothing, I say. Have it all, and have it all right now.

The inside of a coffin is a dull, lonely and passion less place. Don't be in a hurry to climb in.