is it not that i question myself to discover my self worth
but self indulgance
do i help others as to gain thier attention
do i stand alone for fear of rejection
do i sharpen my wit to discourage opinion
do i write merely to pass the time
i hope not i fear so

fabled aseop
the fox who sneered at the grapes he couldnt reach
tho wolf who cried foul so as to kill the sheep
the grasshopper who died for just skipping thru life
the scorpion killing the dog and dying as well
the 2 ***** and the donkey they had
the hunter skunked 3 times bleep bleep

isnt it silly we do not learn from historic tales and imagine its the times that create the people we read about in the papers
the nature of man has always been here

i'm dating on mingle its hopeless i think
not the site just hope
twisting and turning like a vain in the wind
i try to explain the mess i am in
i've used up my self pity and started on angst
sooner or later i'll stop picking on myself
but til then i do what im good at
which is laf at myself it helps
but there are too many switches conductors and baggage
i'll still wish for a life but it wont matter
never again will i make the mistake
of shutting myself up
because of what people think.....

12:30
i gaze out my window arcs of light fading into the night yet the darkness does not touch me now errant noises do not disturb my reflections looking inward i see calm no eddies to carrry thoughts away i rest easy pacified by the soothing passage of words on to paper revealing my thoughts to me strange how we know so litle of ourselves the potential escapes us it is peacful now my mind like the lover who lies sated content with the feelings expended
would that i suffer this strange delusion more often without hiding away seeking solace in seclusion

for no reason other than i can
contradiction
eyes closed to the past ...expecting a distant future..how i rail at that which deceives me into thinking i'm alone.....thought empty of promise fills my aching head with its echo....the words unclear a montage of images searing my blind eyes and now the voices are back insisting i listen to thier silent message

why bullying is taught in schools
pride goeth before a fall yes i remember that and the meek shall inherit the earth,do unto others yap yap yap
why is it these pithy sayings clearly show a lack of understanding the human nature.i'll never get ahead like that. get outta my way push and shove see just like that.....now im
getting somewhere and never mind the meek they can have the earth when i'm finished with it if they wish

see just empty words of no value other than to think and consider
this is fun for me and therapy

hmm it is possible that you think i am saying that anyone who does not want change is a fool if so plz stand corrrected i am extremly well aware that change especially 2 much is no good either also once i had the time to dwell on what you said i realize i missed much of it i admire the way you put your thoughts forward and agree with just about most of it .i am no scholar grade 10 dropout.i am mostly doing this because i wrecked my back working 2 hard and the gov has agreed i have enuff mental problems to be labeled mentally handicapped an extreme concusion at 4-5 mths old may have contributed to my issues with impulse and inhibition or lack therof it is no different than being 2 short to reach the water fountain really... change to suit the enviro deal with it tks again for input

more verbiage called homeless
Alone amoung us he stands like a lone charred lightning hit tree
he bled pain thru our eyes with his croooked stance with his plea
the torture of years past plain in ere contorted muscle as plain as the time etched lines carving his face
the pain in his voice was far by the worst no physical abuse could equal the emotions scarred,ripped,shredded and cut that took his voice thru every hurt and oh lord how it cut so quick to our conscience
how quick we were to bleed money out of are pockets and he laffed and scoffed and groweled at our pain and said stop buying fish and going home

as an example this is not what i started
perspective
To be a bird and see thru thier eyes, no colour,
perception shaped by need,perhaps would be no different than blindness. not knowing the difference unable to compare having no basis to decide. would this be worth the freedom of soaring-high above all that we dont understand have little use for
thiers is a world of black and white prosper or die winters bleak summers dry heat faced with a problem we decide to envy them without a clue blindly thinking that freedom doesnt carry its own bitter cost
i havnt a clue if they can see colour btw

thank you as i may have mention i am happy if you like any pce. i do this as a way to improve my 'person' however it makes sense to appreciate others enjoying it tks again also thks to kc003 i hope noone is put out when the garbage appears laff the good the bad the ugly i do it all

merci leigh

yes you have the well read part down rite but the rest is just tooooo much ethusiasm and a need to get rid of many old bad habits as a rule i think of none of this stuff. it usually is typed ex as dropped from pen however after many years of raging against the machine i am attempying to utilize my asets and admit to my faults would u believe i very much envy persons such as yourself who have a gift for visualart ps at 50 i believe i qualify very well as an old fool i dont suffer from insanity i enjoy it thank you by the
way

good day i actually would like to take that back and instead say thank you for sharing i found the title and content very inspiring

awesome tks

hi nice writing good subject i hope you wont mind the credit.! but for some reason the title and some of the subject made me go off on a tangent and write radar love a bit on stalkers i will have it printed here tomorrow i hope look forward to having time to reading more of your style. thanks? again for distracting my brain LOL

love is a coat of many colours
lust respect trust to name a few
it is amazing how colours are used
feeling blue? does your love miss you too
perhaps your friends are green with envy
her dad seems to be in a black mood
red is love,blinded of course
matched to anger niether can see
pure as the driven snow
white is her purity and ahh
where did that go?
yellow is what tempers red when lust fades
friends replace frenzy
love grows green as yellow and red blend
eventually budding into the brown of those diapers
ha ha !! pink and blue
does that make you purple
like your face is gonna blow

i claim literary license lol colour blind?

as a second note i get 1hr a day on library puter short story
i am not shure if this is right way to proceed but mistakes dont bother me overly...sorry if spelling sucks,,,,punctuation hmmm
here is example of why i dont bother editing a little
as written
my fields are empty my lands barren of a crop worth harvesting
i spend all my time worrying about weeds
that grow only because of the fertile poison of my mind
i worrry if i grow corn oats and wheat
my nieghbours will take what i dont eat
selfisness is the fertilizer i spread so lavishly
laziness the crop i sow
thistles the crop i reap
and store in the barn i neglect and now an attempt to edit

yes i have a garden of which i am so proud
vanity grows like mad amoung the towering ego
pride suffocates anger chokes
there is no place here for charity,love,hope
venomous hatred lavishly distributed
diluted with others tears
i carefully cultivate that i do not disturb
the roots of envy and greed
no love is lost-instead discarded like weeds
joy in the acccomplishments of others joins the pile
and i curse those who offer me the seeds of goodwill
preferring to take that which is not offered instead
why do i love this garden so much that i spend all my time
ensuring nothing will grow that
will comfort the hurt,sustain the hungry,support the weak
i have so little i say
because others may take that which they wish without my consent
in spite of the razor sharp wire of my ill concealed contempt
my prejudices,my hate,my version of the truth
surrounding the garden
alter-editing? so i pretty much leave things as they are
it is better for me to dislike a verse than to waste hours trying to make small changes i feel somewhat like a cheat because these are not dragged out of me most just go thier own way i just scribble the nonsense down

Bonjour Bien Matin
i wake and rub the sandmans gift into my eyes
and curse
only a fool repeats the same mistake
and expects different results [m twain? ]
i look outside and the world is perfect
millions of visually hardened precipitates
slowly drifting to earth
obliberating all that i see
turning the bleak reality of my mistakes
into a world reminicent of a childs toy
and as the sleep falls and reality sets in
i see with adult eyes and curse again
danmnit it's snowing

allrighty then

once upon a time
Knights of valour did stain with blood the battlefield
a stand against injustice
thier code a brand not endured lightly
loyalty honour fight greed
corruption like rust
insiduous creeping
forcing honest men from thier homes
staining truth ignoring that which true men die protecting

Kings and Queens rich and poor wait with hearts racing wildly
thier fate resting on the backs of men most would never know
once upon a time that is clearly past
evil could not stand against the might of right
but the winds of time have worn away the good
in mens hearts and souls

And the clock strikes 3

i think if i write enough
i will get to that which bothers me the most
like a pebble in my shoe here now gone again
an earworm from my youth
i know not what i seek
i hope it willl come to me
i hate to think of all the time
i could have wasted
instead of chasing a dream
a moment in time
a thought lost
some recollection
remembered dimly
distraction overtakes me
i change direction
i wander aimlessly
words cannot paint the picture trapped in my mind